January 8, 2010
I want to talk to you about homosexuality. Though I was born with it, that doesn’t make it right.
Love God. Love God more than your flesh and inhibitions. Not to act on it. Not to act on it. Acting on it brings misery and death. Mom was right. Dad tried to make me see. It is the hardest card to be dealt—a STRUGGLE. I am happy that some had accepted more—it makes life tolerable for those that have it. But the urges, they are strong. The compulsion is not normal. It will control your life.
Ed is okay. He waited for his right man and celebrated his partnership by striving to be a good person, always bettering himself.
Girls that have been hurt by men can’t open, they are ruled by fear. Their love is a different form of expression. It is restorative, calm, “two buddies in battle” sort of relationship. That happens, and it allowed.
It is the individual form of expression type “I gotta be me” that exists but shouldn’t. Sometimes you don’t have to ‘be all the way out there.”
Everyone ‘out there’ has to really pray. Accept and ask why God gave it to them, this hardship. It always has existed, and has been selected by the spirits before they arrive. It is the HARDEST thing to take (next to being a single mother, the kids) Always pray for those you know to ‘find God.” To find God honey. Not the ‘roses on South Beach.”
It is good to discover yourself and come to terms with it. Only what God wants. Only what God wants honey. There is a way out—mine was to be with animals and to take care of them, to build. It is important for a man to build. Ed does hair, Jeffrey does boxes, they are an anchor in their family unit (which was dysfunctional to begin with). Keep seeking what God wishes—
Jeffrey his daughter and the harm he caused without being awake (what the mother said.).
You can trust your son with them. They are holy. Not all of them are. The loudest and the most vocal don’t support godly ways. It will manifest in those individuals as hardship in another life. They are riding on the current free-not contributing.
Some straight folks are this way in their twenties but children change them. Almost always. Even (my sons' first name) father did. Your message to him about his boy’s love for him was important in a lot of ways.
C: Oh Ryan—I totally get you. It was hard for me—I wanted to be intimate so much God wouldn’t let me have it. My child changed that so much. Really balance and priorities.
Ryan: Shhh. It’s gong to be okay for you. I promise it. Talk to Tim. And clean! Put away all the Christmas lights and stuff. It is strangling you. Have a good day.
God Bless You and thank you for listening.
God will marry you.
Ryan of the holy flesh light—‘holy flash light’.