LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA, USA - MARCH 8, 2013 - Delta Airlines Airbus A320-212 takes off from Los Angeles Airport on March 8, 2013. The plane has a range of 5,900 km with 150 seats.
I am Carla St. Laurent, M.D. and this is my home. Whenever I fly anywhere I usually fly out of Los Angeles International Airport, or LAX as we call it. That's where my boy learned to read--those very tall letters on Century Boulevard, which spelled out the airport--L-A-X.
I've been blogging ever since I got my Reiki Master in December 2010. I started this blog with excitement, enthusiasm and wonder. I sensed a great energy as I made that first blog post. I had no idea what it would become.
Initially I thought I would bring Reiki into Conventional Medicine. And that was it.
Instead I have been on a personal journey of growth that has taken me to the stars, to a world where Spirit and Love are right near us (but invisible to the untrained eye), and also, an awakening of the hidden symbols and 'magic' which aren't good for humanity but are cleverly hidden in plain sight.
What are my results of my efforts, at blogging nearly every day?
I send Reiki out with Ross, my Twin soul, who is well-known and a 'celebrity' here and in the Higher Realms (apparently I am no 'nobody' 'up there' too, in my meditations I have seen the crowds)--every day, along with Divine Peace Healing, two separate healings in all--daily to lots of people. Like, millions.
That's probably the most important thing, the raising of the vibration and consistency, and the connection which has formed in out community. Many members were in our community in Ross' immediate past life, and our souls are family/known to one another, and this brings great peace.
Fortunately in sharing my journey, online, others have joined to share theirs, and together we are waiting patiently for 'a change' which has been predicted for a long time, and it's a big one. We are talking the coming of the energy of Heaven on Earth.
Beautiful landscape of Beartooth Pass. Shoshone National Forest, Wyoming, USA. Sunrise scene.
It's not easy. This life is difficult for most. And when, like those of you who follow this page, layer on the tasks of the Spirit--the real reason we are here--it's tiring. It's a long journey. We are never alone, technically, for our guides are forever with us while we are incarnate. But since we can't really enjoy their presence face-to-face, it's a long walk home without clarity of understanding much of the Big Plan.
Ross and I have wanted to keep this blog and our outreach as a source of comfort and guidance to those of you who are walking the same path.
I've kept my name secret for the longest time, even though I'm certain through my social media those who have had an interest to find out, have found out through their own means.
I wanted to protect both my career and my boy with my identity 'private'.
Basically the reason behind this is fear. Fear of the unknown. Fear of being 'out there'. Fear of having some super 'science-y' repercussions for my work.
Know most people around me know I do Reiki. And they tolerate it or support it. I did an art class at my work, my boss knew, and he was okay with it.
So today is the first time I let go of that fear. And I can just 'be'.
Church of the Primacy of St Peter at the shore of the Sea of Galilee where Jesus,it is believed, appeared for the fourth time after his resurrection(John 21:1-24)
The last few days have been really difficult.
I've been working on some core issues--Ross is quiet so I know it's my soul work--the first is that when I have had a dream home in the past I lost it, and now I can't even move forward towards moving or decorating or remodeling. I worry about the expense, the financial security. And I absolutely cannot put 'me' into my home--my 'design touch' or 'expression of myself'. There's a huge ancient 'block' in my soul. I had to just say, 'uncle' and let it go. Ross has given hints and told me it will be easy when it's my time to move. Just know for this issue I am paralyzed with fear.
The other core issue is Ross' violent death which I witnessed and was present throughout.
It's hard to heal. Even after many lifetimes.
It's my heart.
I realized with Anthony and Jared's automobile accident that life is a gift, a very fragile and tenuous one, and we can be here one day, gone the next, with no explanation whatsoever.
I've asked Ross if attachments get broken this haphazardly up in Heaven, because if that's the case, I'm not going to like it because I ENJOY loving and being loved on a predictable basis.
Ross has been quiet.
And last night, as I was falling asleep, I confessed to my Higher Self that I'm really lost, and sad, and depressed. I see all these lies everywhere around me in the media and the politics and it has me down. I've been watching for some sort of movement against the darkness, for nothing. I'm so weary, so deeply weary, I just want it over so I can rest. From here it looks like the fight is getting nowhere, that the opposition won't give up, and we are doomed for all eternity to be stuck here on a dying planet with no morals, no freedom, and no grace.
I think she was surprised I would talk to her, and seek her out. I sought out Divine Father too. I don't feel like myself. I have little motivation. I can't think straight. I wouldn't be surprised if 5G is up and running in the Los Angeles region because I know it's a test zone. And it's been super hard to 'hear' Spirit too.
Scenic road UT 211
Part of this 'funk' was the stark realization that I am a slave at my work.
When I got the call from Anthony about the accident, my heart was in anguish. I called my boss after I had contacted a friend to come. And he said I was 'lucky' that there were people home. Otherwise he couldn't do anything. Would he cancel cases for me? (the natural alternative--if it happened to a surgeon they would cancel their lineup). No. And I had to arrange my own coverage on the spot. He wouldn't call anyone back in for me.
Money was more important.
Then I was first call on Friday, the day after the accident. A friend offered for me to stay home until six p.m.--she had dinner plans--but only if I would cover for HER on Monday until six p.m. There's no school this week! She's a mom! She wanted to be home on Monday too.
On Friday, I did so many cases. One after the other. And each one has the same tasks, the same repetitive motion. That's when I felt non-human, more machine than heart, because of the production pressure.
My boss had the mistake on Monday of having to do a four-hour case that normally takes one hour but went bad. He knows I don't mind staying late if it's once in a while. The next day, I was on for that. The following day too, at the surgery center. And Friday, I saw a four p.m. start, in my boss' lineup, and KNEW in my bones I would be doing that case. I knew it would come to me.
Sure enough it did. But by some miracle, all the other rooms were going too. And someone finished two minutes after me, and they were stuck with the one hour recovery duty onsite.
I went to the main O.R. at the hospital and finished my shift. I'd like to say more, but it was pleasant although long (four hour case) and I learned a lot and enjoyed the patient.
NARBONNE, FRANCE - JANUARY 06: Regional electric train at Narbonne station on January 6, 2014. SNCF operates 211 trains of the class Z 27500
Today is better.
Last night Anthony wanted to go with friends, and a friend's dad drove them. It was funny because Anthony and I don't fight, but he challenged me and I was surprised. It was a 'get together' that 'happened to be on a girl's birthday' and she was organizing it.
I told him, 'you need a gift to acknowledge her birthday'. He argued against it. Strongly. He said, 'only a girlfriend would want it, and I don't want people to think she's my girlfriend!'
I said, 'after puberty, girls are different. With a boy they will tell you what they want, even what gift to buy. She is testing you, testing the friendship. There is a whole unwritten world out there in the world of girls. I can't read her, but I know enough about the social situation that you better have something ready to give just in case.'
He was still angry. We know another mother who has excellent social skills. So we called her. He got mad at my voicemail I left and erased it. I was blunt and he didn't like it.
When I got home I texted. And she called the girl's dad to ask. He said she didn't want lots of attention, but yes, it's her birthday. And our mom friend sent the husband to the store to buy a gift cart. I asked how much, she said, 'twenty five dollars'.
So Anthony sent me to the Hobby Lobby because this girl enjoys 'costumes' and 'anime'. And I bought three cards--for him to pick one that wasn't girlfriend-y -- and the gift card for $25.
He was all showered and ready to go.
I explained to him since he's known the birthday girl so many years--all of elementary school--she's more like a sister because you grew up together, and she deserves a little respect and attention on her special day.
When he came home he said she was so happy she had tears in her eyes, and his gift was her favorite. It was a whale card with three whales in birthday hats. And his choice in gift card shows that he 'gets' her.
He came home very happy.
The outbreak of the unprecedented Great East Japan Earthquake and tsunamiI had a hard time at home while he was gone. I've felt like this. I even tried to go to sleep without dinner. I lay on the couch and that's when I spoke with my H.S.
But I watched some YouTube later. I liked one on picking pointe shoes.
You can see what I watch on my channel, 77Picklehead. Just follow the history if you're interested. The one about the homeless I watched last night helped me to see the truth of what The Council has been saying--many people live under deplorable conditions, and it's not right. They need to be healed/assisted first.
We can't heal the planet until the needs of the hungry and homeless are addressed.
Today is better. I'm not as anguished. I've had a good night's rest. I've let go of the frustration of not being able to enjoy my time on earth, my free time, due to my work hours. When I worked part-time, and had benefits, my house was clean and I was able to do things I enjoyed, as well as enjoy being a mom.
I've worked full-time now for ten years, even though I'm part time in name only at my work all of us have crazy long hours.
I realized accurately last night that my cup was very empty, and I needed time to heal before I could resume my 'to do' tasks, my 'outreach' tasks, and one day, I hope, my website and app (there's talk with Apple I need to do, and it's just a big headache. If I used the apple ID I have with another name it would be up tomorrow, but the developer wants my name on it, and I'm frankly in over my head trying to find a day off work where I can accomplish this...I paid for the apple ID last year, and it's due for renewal now, I've probably missed the date for it...)
I've let go of my dreams for someone coming to 'save us' or even for us to 'save ourselves'--if it happens, it happens, but there's really not much I can do from where I sit to affect anything. The brainwashing runs deep on the general population. They seem to like it, to prefer it to being awake. And the ones doing the brainwashing keep reinforcing it. Instead of hoping and dreaming I've simply decided the problem is too big for me, and 'kicked it upstairs' and let it go. Divine Creator can take care of it. Ross and his teams can keep at it. And if they stick me someplace to do work, like they did recently, well, I can do my part, I don't mind.
I see the 'squeeze' going tighter and tighter on the people and the planet. I don't like it. I don't see any intervention or evidence of hope, so I let it go.
I do have hope.
Right now it's hope against hope.
And life right now is getting difficult enough I must pay attention to that for a while. I love writing, and I'll keep writing. I don't mind healing and personal growth, so while my boogeymen are poking around in my deepest darkest fears and terrors, I'll examine whatever comes up for healing, and I won't fight it.
From what I've heard, everything is in process--the Event or Awakening or Ascension--and I've been told it will be like waking up from a nightmare. We will suddenly find ourselves in a better place.
It was a good source who told me that. So I'll trust it.
Our countdown day is 211. I was excited for 212 because 212F is the boiling point of water.
And I will keep counting.
When given the choice to love or fear, I will love.
When I'm overwhelmed--like with my job--I'll tell my Higher Self I want a new one that's better, and I'll look for signs to fix the situation. Already it's hard enough to see the dentist (one year now) and the periodontist (two years) and doctor (don't ask!). I'm not sure when I can job hunt! LOL.
I liked this video, especially the end: https://www.shiftfrequency.com/i-need-a-miracle-a-story-of-triumph-and-victory-video/
There is a plan, and it's in progress. I will do my part. And I think all in all that's the most I can do.
Carla had a very hard time of it with Anthony. I am proud of her for facing this challenge with an open heart.
Carla has been made aware earlier this year through Anthony about his father's dangerous driving style. He cuts in and out of the freeway traffic, weaves through, often at very high speeds which frighten Anthony.
Her options are to talk to him (Jared is stubborn and will reinforce the behavior if told not to), go the full legal approach (and make Anthony sever ties with his father, again, not good for the child or the family), and to trust US and therefore accept that one day she might lose her son.
It is delicate her psyche after the experience of losing me.
When a bone is broken, and it is to be set, the bones must be moved a little further in the direction of the break in order to loosen them and allow them to be made straight.
This is what is happening with Carla and her soul. I had to move her in the direction of pain, just a little bit, in order not to overwhelm her, and allow the restructuring of her soul in the area where it was hardest hit (the loss of our newborn son who she was told 'died' and never saw the body, and the loss of me all within a year).
I am an expert Healer and I and all of the souls up here who are close to Carla are working their best to assist her in her growth.
There is a physician at Carla's work, who's from Sicily like her mom. His father always called him, 'the crooked branch' because he didn't follow the path of the family.
Carla is no crooked branch.
She is straight and true.
And believe it or not, she is headed on track to a glorious future in Heaven with me at her side, to experience joy and fullness of heart, never to be stricken again with grief that overwhelms her.
All of YOU are heading for this future too.
I want you to see this:
I told a story once about a person telling someone about a speck in their eye, but they didn't realize they had a log in their own eye while they were noticing the speck.
I ask you to let go of all preconceptions, or what was told to you or promised.
This pastor is right, absolutely correct about the subterfuge behind the scenes with 'the ecumenicals'--they take the focus off a personal relationship with Creator Divine.
The log is for itself quite obvious.
Now please direct your attention to the comments section.
You will notice how in this older video, the comments and machinations of the social media complex of control aren't evident. And how many people are wide awake, absolutely, in calling a spade a spade (what Dr. Billy Graham is...is very dark).
I want you to read about the confessions of those who thought Dr. Graham was of the light, and how they cried and cried upon learning the truth.
And it is for this that I invite you to hold compassion.
Those who were told lies and believed them are just as innocent as you and me who know the truth.
The time is coming soon! where there will be need of this.
I want you to remember Carla's example, and to WITHDRAW when there is need to fill your own cup. I want you to make a reservation for a massage or a special treat, to do it right--to really show the joy and nurturing to YOU--before you go back into the consoling mode.
Take all the time you need to comfort yourself first--like putting on your own oxygen in an airplane--and do not be concerned about the wait/duration until our 'countdown is done'. We have 365 - 211 is 154, we are almost reaching the halfway point. Hang on and do your best until our countdown is done.
THEN you can 'give up' (he's smiling and teasing me--ed)
Aloha and Mahalos,
Ross and Carla