I drove home from work today in silence. I like to keep the radio turned off so I can 'be' sometimes. That's when I meditate; it's when I drive. In Los Angeles the car is your second home. I grew up saying the rosary when I drove because I was afraid. It really helped with my fear. But then, I got to praying, and one thing led to another, and now, I can do this.
As I pulled out of the driveway from work, I felt his presence. This isn't the first time I have had contact with Michael. Lately he's been working on something with me. I wasn't sure what, but I post it right away as it happens.
I pulled onto the freeway. He asked, 'what is it you would like to do with me?'
My soul answered, 'I would like to sing a song with you Michael.' (Sometimes my soul answers, it feels 'different', like the time I learned Divine Peace Healing and my soul cried out, 'I want to HELP bring peace'. I wasn't a big protester when I was in Berkeley or anything. I just wanted to survive. That answer was very unlike 'me', but it was my Truth nonetheless. It always surprises me. ; ) )
'What would you like to sing? Billie Jean? I like that song.' Michael suggested, very upbeat.
I wanted to sing one of my favorites, and was thinking, but I realized there was a reason for this song. So I said, 'Yes'.
The music started. And he started singing. I interrupted him and said, 'Michael, I want to DANCE! I want to sing and dance like you. Can I do that too please?'
He said yes and I could be a back-up dancer but not dance like him because it would look funny, I am a girl. At first I was more watching and listening. But then I began to move freely and have fun.
Then a verse came, and Michael handed me the microphone, 'And people always told me, be careful what you do, don't go around breaking young girl's hearts'....I sang all by myself. I handed the mike back.
He took the next part. Then we were singing a duet, with him taking a few lines and then having me take some next. At the end we were singing and dancing and laughing together.
Michael is so gentle and fun. I wish I could share with you how beautiful it was to be like that with him.
I confided that I always loved him since the first time I heard him sing. Not like a boyfriend, I just, something inside me really liked him and connected. He said, 'It's because I have talent.' He explained how God gave him this gift to help others, and he used it to the best he could with what he had.
He also spoke with me about another person. It is a private matter. But I can say is he was totally kind and really made me laugh about the situation. He gave me hope and understood all.
I forget exactly how he said it, but he wanted to give me a gift for a reason that was kind and thoughtful. He put a big, expensive, shiny necklace around my neck. You know, the kind they wear at the awards ceremonies? I was surprised, then at once, horrified! Did any diamond miners suffer for me to wear these? He reassured me, and said, 'No. They are diamonds of Spirit, they just show up. Nobody has to work for them like that.' They were very heavy, but I wasn't sure I liked the look. He waved his hand over it, making them iridescent, like an opal but not with the little specks of rainbow; it was more of an overall effect. He said it was to remind me of where I am from, and that was the look from my home where my soul originated.
I thought for a moment, accepted the gift, and then asked him about Elizabeth Taylor. Was she of the Light?
He asked, 'Well, what do you think?' And I understood--her courage to stand up for AIDS patients in support of them made her an angel. For all her addictions, at her very core, she was good. I smiled because he had answered my question.
He was getting ready to go, and I started crying. I said, 'Michael, I like you so much I wish I could be like this forever. I don't want you to go. You understand everything without my having to explain it. I have always wanted a friend like this. And besides, I am not so good with trusting people to come when I need them.'
I showed him a picture of the neglect I had at the babysitter who was drunk when I was around one year old.
He said he would come back any time I thought of him and wanted him to come.
'Do you mean it?' I asked, embarrassed to be such a baby about it.
So we practiced. He went away, and I thought of him, and he'd come back. It took about three times for me to let it sink in that he meant it. But he really had to go.
He told me one thing before he left: to do everything I could tonight to make my babysitter and her boy happy. They have had hard times, having recently lost her mother. It was her birthday, and I was taking them out to dinner with my boy too. Michael said to only concentrate on that one thing, and to do it with all my heart and soul. It was needed by them, needed very much.
I took them to Outback.
They both hadn't eaten anything all day. Not breakfast. Not lunch. And I got home around seven.
Watching them both relax and laugh and eat was the nicest thing in the whole world.
And over her left shoulder, I saw her mother, Ethel, in spirit, smiling the whole time. She was between both of them. I could feel the love bursting forth from her heart that her daughter and only grandson were enjoying themselves in celebration for the first time since she had passed. She knew I saw, and I could tell she approved. She didn't say anything. I just knew.
I wouldn't dare tell my friend who watches my boy--not in a million years---what I saw; she is Christian, and thinks this is the work of Satan.
I know when to keep my mouth shut. LOL. I see dead people but I'm wise enough know what is cool and what isn't.
Aloha and mahalo and namaste,