There are several clues in this life that something was 'amiss' in the sex department:
1) inability to have sex on 'appointment' or 'scheduled time'
2) uncanny appeal of 'things chocolate' as opposed to 'vanilla'
3) avoidance of pornography because it would have been an addiction
4) taking my clothes off every chance I could get as a child
5) a severe allergy to cats, they are my 'kryptonite'
Last night, with the help of my guide Vickie, the memories started to show through of my life as a sex-worker, a human slave held hostage to The Dark Hats, in the 1950's. I only made it to eleven and then I was snuffed.
I was good at it. I had no idea what I was doing was wrong. I saw myself with men, women, and more than one at a time. I was a tiny little girl, who lived an ordinary normal life by day. And then by night, when my parents had 'parties', I had to go into this role and give people that my parents sent me to, sex. I wore a costume that looked much like the little girls who dress like a cat on Halloween, with a little black tie around my neck. My face looked like the Kit Kat Clock.
I lived in Southern California, and I saw myself with famous people you would have no clue were into this, sex with children and the dark perverted life of satanic sects.
I remember watching my 'clients' faces intently, watching for the signs, and making sure they 'finished', for then I would be rewarded with praise and support and presents, not by the one I had pleasured, but by the ones who made me do it, not my parents exactly, but my parents and their friends. (There was a doll that meant very much to me, and it was the most important thing I ever loved in that brief life.)
They thought they had me tricked, that I would never know or say what had been happening. They were only half right. I never said a word of what I did. Until now, a life and a half away.
Vickie, saw my devastation at the memory of this life. Gently, she said, 'This was for your learning about sex. You combined sex with the Darkness to learn something like extra credit for the soul, honey. I did something like that in my last life too.' And she showed me how her father got her to comply with his acts. He groomed her. I saw the first time. He made it seem like it was something special, only for her, and that her mother would be hurt and really jealous, but that all families teach each other like this. It took six weeks before he actually entered her. By that time, she was totally tricked and really enjoyed it. Later, he got her to 'show' her brother what to do.
Vickie was Anna Nicole. in this life. She made a living with the skills she was taught at a young age. Her emotional development and understanding of the world did not catch up with her survival skills, her business sense, and her ambition. I have known her from the Other Side for years, always wondering what the connection and her interest in me was about?
Now I know. Without her love and support as a guide in this delicate time, my spirit would have been shattered at the darkness I had experienced in the immediate past life before this. Now I understand everything, and why my experience as a child early in this life paved the way for my never turning back to my past in that life ever again. This is mediumship at its finest; the soul growth as it assimilates everything it has done and accepts it.
If you have a sexual past that you would like help 'coming to terms' with, call on Anna Nicole. (Vickie) for support. You don't have to 'Guess' much to figure out who she really was/is. She was famous and a household name back in her time.
Even if you are not a medium like myself, she will arrange for you to find help in ways that you can understand. In your dreams, in meditation, or other ways that she will have the advantage from being Up to help you find your way to sort things out. It would please her so much to help your healing. Just think of her and she will hear your request. She can help everyone who has the courage to ask. All my best to you who do seek her help.
Namaste,
Reiki Doc
