Yesterday I posted a disagreement to the Heavenletter message from the Divine.
I also put it up on my Facebook page, and got many responses.
One of them hurt.
'Change your thinking and your will be happy! It's all YOU! It's YOU who is putting the blame on God! I'm not even going to read all of what you have to say.'
Nee-ner nee-ner nee-ner!!!
I was like #%$&! Where is the nurturing, warmth, love and compassion in THAT?
So I forgot about it after my feeble reply, something along the lines of, 'Dude?' and went off to teach a Karuna Reiki One class and forget about everything else for the entire day.
How many days like this do I have a month, where there is no work and no kid?
Exactly ONE day a month, if I am lucky. That's it. Sometimes I don't get that day at all, or I am terribly sleepy from being post-call.
Here is the exact interchange on Facebook, and then after that, I'll share what Father-God said while I was meditating in the garden in the warm California sunshine...
The comments that are posted here from each of my dear readers, including the one who is more advanced than I am and at least cared enough to offer me a helping hand....are pure Goddess Energy. Please, note the presence of the unmistakable signs of nurturing, warmth, love and compassion in every word shared...
I was going to post the Heavenletter, but it didn't sit well with me. Here is is, along with my perspective. Please let me know how the Heavenletter makes YOU feel. Am I way off base with my sentiments? I'd like to know.
Okay, so I am in the garden sending my Divine Peace Healing like this:
And I feel Him.
He usually doesn't come.
Earlier at breakfast, I was thinking about the only dream I have, that pales all the others by comparison, is: to be reunited with my eternal Twin Soul forever and ever and ever.
Although I was sharing my smoothie with Harry my cockatoo, Ross came in, and rubbed my right forearm, and said, 'it's coming' in a very calm and soothing voice.
I don't want anything else. I never wanted anything else. I only want Him and to Get Out of Here.
(Galactics don't like the density of Gaia's 3D. Any dimensional difference of one level makes both parties a little 'uncomfortable'. I'm 11D! That's seven entire dimensions difference--and that's why I'm so miserable on earth, in a spiritual way. I love my home and my friends and family and I love helping people and doing everything I do. But it's not HOME home, and I REALLY miss it.)
Anyhow, I felt Him, and I was like waiting for Him to speak. I told him how much I didn't like having free will, free choice, because I like everything to be just the way of God 24/7, without ceasing, and it was incomprehensible to me for anyone to ever make a choice away from His Will. It frightens me what can happen when people 'choose'. And it hurts.
Just then a lizard ran by.
God casually mentioned it and asked me what lizards do?
I know from my Animal Medicine Cards that lizards are the dreamers. They eat. They sleep. And they spend an awful lot of time basking in the sun, in God's glory, basically. (this is what seraphim do, every day, and never stop). In doing this the lizards create reality.
I saw God was right, and I thanked him, and I also appreciated His gentleness and patience with me on this lesson.
He asked, very softly, 'How much time to you spend basking....?'
I have no downtime whatsoever. I understood you don't have to literally be in the sun to bask in His Glory. And perhaps for me, it would do me some good to just no matter what I am doing, superimpose a layer of 'bask'.
Then even more softly He said, 'I would never have let you come here if I had thought you would get damaged in any way.'
And I cried out to Him, softly, and tenderly, 'If I did get hurt in any way would you make it stop?'
Over dinner with a friend, she calmly suggested, 'There is a certain kind of beauty in pain...'
I was like, 'What???'
Something had happened to her son, when he was eleven. And her husband, who loved him very much, was overcome with grief.
She never realized how much her husband loved their son until she saw him consumed with sorrow and tears over what happened to their boy (who lived, but needed a lot of counseling after the trauma).
She said in a way, pain shows you something that you might not appreciate. And in a way, that is a good thing...
It gave me hope, her words, that perhaps there was some point in all of this free will and suffering.
If you ask me, life on Gaia is a lot like going to medical school--it is doable--but if you ask any physician, including myself, 'would you do it again?' and they would say 'no'.
There are some things you can just do once, and it takes everything out of you that you ever had. You're glad you did it.
But you would never 're-enlist'...
Aloha and Mahalos,