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Friday, March 28, 2014
To My Love Of My Life
I love you so much, God.
I love you so much I agreed to this thing called 'life', this 'experiment', and let myself be blocked from every joyful happy memory I have from when I was with You, before birth, in this latest cycle of reincarnation.
Today you wrote this: http://sirianheaven.wordpress.com/2014/03/28/heavenletter-4872-everything-comes-from-within-you-march-28-2014/
On earth, as healers, who are compassionate and understanding, we never tell a grieving person how to feel as they recover from their loss.
It takes time. It is personal, deeply personal to the soul, to 'process' the loss in their own way, in their own time.
This is one of the truly few ways that honor is respected in the same 'time does not exist' manner as it does back at home, in Heaven.
Time for the bereaved, does not exist. They muster the healing forces up just as best as they can.
Do you not see and feel and experience the tremendous grief all of us have from the experience from leaving Home and coming here to Gaia?
We so very bravely do our best to carry on and act as if we are fine when our very foundation of stability, has been weakened by our veil of Illusion?
It is disorienting at best, and truly devastating at worst, and all of us to some degree or another experience this.
You are entirely correct to say we have the ability to decide how to be, how to feel, and to give us the permission to 'let some things go'...
Even when the Illusion dissolves, I suspect there is going to be some major triage and resuscitation because of the adaptations people have adopted in order to function within the Illusion as a whole. When they are taken away, the auras will leak, and people will need tender loving attention to their 'wounds'.
Almost all wounds heal. I understand your scar analogy better than most, because of my line of work.
I LOVE YOU! I will never forget you!!! Even in my blindness and my stumbling, I have a crystal clear memory in my heart of what it was like to be Home in Heaven with YOU.
I can't do any better in my healing at the present. These wounds, Father, are on my very soul!
The best I can do is to be vulnerable, to show you every scrape and scratch, and ask YOU the eternal Healer of ALL THAT IS, to gently wash out the dirt, to cleanse it, and to dress it with a bandage to protect it from getting re-injured or contaminated so it has a chance to heal.
I know where you are coming from, and why you wrote this. I know you are feeling in your heart, 'I made this all for you, to enjoy, and to feel blessed, and to create! Why aren't you making the best of it?'
It is like when a child stumbles and falls, and you make something fun and light to distract them, and make them smile.
I know your way...
The most important thing you have ever said in any of the Heavenletters, and there are like, over thousands and thousands of them, is You ask me if I know of the pain and suffering? I KNOW.
I appreciate it.
Sometimes here on earth people try to act as if nothing ever happened.
That's not cool.
Will you please hold my hand after I get up and dust myself off? And when my wound gets better, perhaps I can choose a nice bandage out of the box, one that pleases me, so I can look at it and know we both want me to heal?
I'd rather be with YOU more than anything in the whole wide world. But for some reason, I am Here, and there is some purpose.
I invite you to join me in the garden. It is time to work on it, and I like that garden very much. Gardens are healing. And please, God, never forget how very painful it is to be so very far away from you--even if you are right next to us and we are just imagining it--and while we are healing we are doing every possible effort to do as you suggest in this letter to us.
I know you have eternal patience! It looks like we are needing all the time we can get to find our way back to you with our hearts. That's why I tried to help and wrote about the OR table plug.
I love you.
Never forget this.
And I can't wait until I get to be with You again. Now let's go spend some time together in the sunshine and listen to the birds...
God? In medicine, we have our patients use a scale to describe their pain from 1 to 10, with 10 being the worst pain you can imagine. When it gets to a 5, you still have pain, but can ignore it.
Today I am a 5 in my homesickness for you.
Let's have fun together and make do, and not mention the pain, okay? Thanks. I love you, and am so very grateful that you understand.
Aloha and Mahalos,