Wednesday, April 9, 2014

My Ex-Boyfriend's Half-Sister's Brother

Growing up in Southern California, bringing up someone in conversation with the girls was as easy as rattling off 'My Ex-Boyfriend's Half-Sister's Brother'.

As a matter of fact, my father's mother (the paternal grandmother) noticed my sharp memory, and decided to make me the family historian. On every visit, out came the photo albums, with quizzing me by pointing to the many faces and asking how they were related to us.

I actually know the difference between a first cousin once removed (your cousin's kid) and second cousins (both of the children from two cousins--my cousin's kid and my kid). I understand the difference between a great Aunt and a great Grandmother. We were not doing formal geneaology--it was just a family role that was passed down to me.

Does any of this sound natural? Can you imagine deer talking like this? I know they have their way of knowing who is with whom, and at mating season the bucks make a big to do about it, but after that, they are all one big herd, together for survival, are they not?

In some indigenous Native cultures, such as the Maori in the movie, The Whale Rider, the tribe is Patriarch- oriented. (And the girl in the movie, the hero, challenged that).

This photo is of a beautiful Inuit family from the Pacific Northwest.

In other cultures, such as Latin culture, the lineage is determined through the Matriarch, in the last names. (Although in modern society here and most likely in other Latin countries, legal Patriarchy prevails).

There is an incredible book titled The Shadow King: The Invisible Force That Holds Women Back that is written by Sidra Stone

This explains this 'hidden' Archtype that perpetuates masculine dominance in the structure of our society.

The author does deep work to discover this very much alive shadow persona deep within her clients, this inherent belief system that is keeping women back because deep down they think they are inferior to men, even some of the most successful ones in business. There is this little voice deep inside that says, 'women aren't good at this'. So to honor the Shadow King, the women unconsciously hold back. And the men have the Shadow King in their subconscious too.

The cruelest example I have ever heard, is of a husband who was once married to a wife who has muscular dystrophy, introducing her to others socially as 'One Of Jerry's Kids' (Jerry Lewis is a well-known spokesperson celebrity and fundraiser for muscular dystrophy in the states.)

He is making it clear that she is beneath both him and the person he is introducing her to, right from the start.

Thank God she was able to finally leave him, and start over. This is about as far from the Divine Feminine that a person can get, this type of cruel, twisted thinking.

Bathwater by No Doubt
(please excuse the tee shirt on the right--this is the only one with lyrics in the video that was not karaoke)

So what can we do about the Silent King, and the resulting imbalance between the Divine Masculine and the Divine Feminine?

We can make ourselves aware of it, and educate ourselves to look for it in our day-to-day experiences.

Why not, next time, introduce your ex-boyfriend's half-sister's brother by their first name only?

Does it really matter how we are 'connected' to each other, when we are all cousins and aunties and uncles in the Ohana that is here on earth, together, as children of Gaia?

Today's long story short is this:
In your own interpersonal relationships, what is it you wish to focus upon? The energy of Separation? Or the energy of Oneness? 

It's your call.

And each day you wake up--it's a clean slate. So as you go through your day, have that little voice on your shoulder ask, 'How's that working today? You like it? Are you comfortable with it?'

Then take it from there.

It's always time for Stirring The Pot--about something or another--at Doctors With Reiki, isn't it? Enjoy your new perspective and trying it on for size to see what 'fits' and what doesn't, okay?

With so very much love,

Aloha and Mahalos,

Reiki Doc

P.S. Is this synchronicity? It might be! You decide--