Thank you everyone for putting up with the poor quality iPad blog post--with NO pictures! It's impossible to put them in with that technology of device!
Many MAJOR breakthroughs are happening in my awareness, and also, with our relationship together, with me and Ross.
I will summarize them for you as best as possible:
Maturing In Spirit
- I worked a twenty-four hour shift on OB. I didn't sleep. I was up all night. I was polite the whole time, and opened my heart to all the new mothers who were seeking relief from their pain--adding to mine a little in the process--but joyfully bringing new life into the world. I also SCHMOOZED the nurses more than ever. I'll tell you why...
- In two months I will not do any OB call. The politics at work swung the other way, and a new "OB Mostly' team is being brought in. Frankly, I won't miss it. Why? Because the workplace is so hostile. It gets me nervous (I have to run up and do the nurses' bidding when they call, I can't even do doctor workflow--I have to put in epidural first then paperwork). Then I make mistakes (none in six months and then two wet taps in one night--on technically challenging patients but still on my 'watch'). So for the past six months, I took to HIDING in the call room between cases to avoid being written up. And guess what? I and another woman are being 'taken off the team' because we 'don't go up'. Our of ten docs who take OB call, six are being asked not to come. So I'm in the majority, at least.
- There is no resentment at this place, only love in my heart. But my Gyn doc today confided to me that when he did OB, an hig-ranking RN who was high risk approached him with her pregnancy, and he declined to care for her. He was persona non grata for four YEARS after that with her. It's THAT hostile! He brings patients and business to the hospital!!!
- I drove halfway home to pick up my son by noon, and got paged by the OR charge nurse who asked, 'did you KNOW about this special request case?!'...um...no....I didn't. But it was someone who needed me, so I turned around and drove back.
- I did this for free. As a gift to humanity. Because this anxious one has multiple medical ailments and I've done four of their procedures--I'm the 'private anesthesiologist' on the case. I started it, but left to the assigned doc.
- Once home, I took a nap. I did that meditation-light sleep. I asked Ross what's up? How come I don't have my feelings for him back like before still after all the Larkspur? I realized it was the council who outvotes him behind the decision to 'clue me in on the Tantra'. So I called THEM in to meet with me. I insisted. This meeting was NOT optional!
- I profusely thanked each of the ones at the desk for their commitment and service to me. I asked next, very politely, if it would be possible that for all decisions that are made on my behalf that affect me that I please be given a say--as I am reaching Full Consciousness enough to participate in my own evolution as a soul. I then showed them a 'movie' of my reaction--tears, anguish, a whole free Saturday spent sobbing in bed--and explained calmly how this is what happens when a decision isn't made properly. I went to each one at the desk thing facing me, one at a time, and asked if they agree to let me have a say in my own development? One by one they said 'yes'. I gave each one a kiss of gratitude, a daisy (to show the beauty of simplicity), and a little popcorn--the gourmet kind with chocolate on it. They agreed to my request, and also, asked, 'Why don't you get some popcorn for yourself?' (there is a store in the area that has my favorite...and later today I did go!)
- At one point, everyone of the Council, which was actually thousands of people too I couldn't see, broke into tears--because I was now healthy, sovereign, and healed. I sincerely thanked them for their efforts to rescue me.
- MY Life Force soared after asserting my sovereignty with the Council.
- So did Ross' respect for me and my assertiveness.
- Now I feel happy with Ross again.
- Next to the popcorn place is Indian. We ate there, me and Anthony. He LIKED it for the first time. And Ross was delighted because he and I go way back to India...
My Amazing Twin
When I was in college in Berkeley, I had never eaten Indian food. My roommate, Patty, took me to Kashmir India restaurant on Solano in Albany when I was twenty-one.
If it is possible to fall in love all at once with a food, a culture, and people, that night, I did. I've always had a place in my heart for India, and in medical school I went often to a little place called KC Tandoor.
Anthony doesn't like Indian food. Not at all.
But since the popcorn place was so close, we went to see if it was open. It was. And next I knew, I had us seated for dinner. I explained to Anthony we would try things...he had his first mango lassi, and, well, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree! He LOVED it.
He enjoyed the rice, the chicken tikka masala, the nan, and the tandoori chicken. Ross was smiling the WHOLE time and I very strongly felt his energy.
You see, back in our time, when Ross and I were both incarnate, I fell in love with India too. We spent many happy times there, and in fact, I wished to remain there for the rest of our lives, together. India, like France, is my 'home away from home' and I have VERY strong ties there...
Ross rekindled my joy, on a day where I literally had none. From lack of sleep to plumbing and the rest, it was highly stressed...until an easy meal with Anthony discovering the cuisine of Mother India...and my being able to enjoy Golab Jamun one more time.
Thank you for helping me find the spark, my beloved. Thank you for taking me in some ways, 'home'.
I Am Your Man
With the plumbing leak in the garage ceiling I had on Christmas Day immediately AFTER gift opening with Anthony's other family...I hit a new realm of dread. We've had the water off to the house except for toilet flushes where I run to the water main--for five days.
Ross had said, 'I am your man, I will take care of the plumbing. Have patience, and I will send the right people for the job.'
Today they fixed the sink but not the ceiling. Why? Because there was NO LEAK. There was moisture--in the walls, and they tested for it, but not in the wood. They used a little saw and cut a one by one foot HOLE in the wall board on the ceiling. It's hanging like a trap door. The water has been on to the house all day, and there's no leak.
It's a miracle if you ask me.
Thank you, honey!
Thank you, honey!
There is a sense of CALM with me, even with things that used to be stressful, like planning winter childcare during break. I just KNOW things one way or another are going to work out. This is huge and very new to experience.
I also have 'flashes' of Galactic behavior being 'normal', more so than 3D. For example, I Skype other light workers, and in my mind's eye, I see us on board our ships in flight suits, as we speak...it's a psychic 'sight', and premonition perhaps?
I want to share with you today my personal messages to Carla today. They might not make sense to you, but they were designed to heal and uplift her heart:
Signs on different trucks that say: Diversified -- Interface -- Wholesome Choice
RED SEA (license plate to show Carla I could fix the plumbing LOL)
As you can see this message is encrypted to Carla's vibrational frequency, as a child who grew up in the 1970's, to communicate with her in a realm of comfort, loving support, and a message of my romantic commitment to her.
Only SHE could begin to understand the meanings of these words, especially the last ones. The are intel for her on the success of some Lightwork projects we have been working on together.
Unconsciously, Carla will KNOW by my persistence with the themes of these messages to her, that I am keeping my promise to her, that I made recently, that all is WELL, and that it is safe for her to open her heart again with me.
If it wasn't for this, the Indian food wouldn't have had its effect. It is her ANCHOR for the new feelings, the return of safety to her with my affection, which is true, and always has been. It has never changed, my affection for her.
It was Carla's PERCEPTION which had the hiccup very mightily, and now we are back 'on track' as a couple again.
The energy flows between our hearts freely, and without effort.
All is well.
Now it is time for Carla to get some sleep... my beautiful One, I promise I will be there for you, no matter what (he knocks on the pipe in the ceiling three times--another 1970's thing <3 )
Life is a beautiful thing. Not only for us. But for each of you. I want you to understand how the message of spirit isn't a broadcast for all to see. It is of the heart, one on one, and only to be understood by the heart.
Aloha and Mahalos,
Ross and Carla, my love, my twin and my angel...