Yesterday was the next to last of my calls on Labor and Delivery. It's a long story, and I won't go into it. Let me just say that the woman who is taking the most calls from here on out says vehemently that 'this is the WORST (as in meanest) OB area she has ever had to work in all her career' at our department meetings, and 'the first day she went to work there they made her cry'. She was thrown out two years ago, out of the hospital by the nurses' complaints against her. And now the nurses want her back.
I had a long day, and I was sorely tested for my patience, my willingness to go the extra mile, for my acceptance of what is...in a word--I am pretty sure I was put to the test by Kuan Yin incarnated.
Epidurals are an art. You sweat when you do them. It is such exacting work, and the needle too far--you see a 'wet tap' (CSF flows out the needle)--and the patient gets a headache the next day.
Placement of one in labor is a blind procedure. It's entirely by feel. Both where to put the needle in the first place, and then how it goes in from there to make sure it's in the right place.
Kuan Yin had a back that was as tight and stiff as a pumpkin as far as the tissue goes. And I couldn't find the right spot because feeling for landmarks was like pressing on a pumpkin--smooth and tight with no 'give' to the tissues. The patient was EXTREMELY patient and nice, but I was given a tough challenge in just about every way an epidural can go. She got relief. But I had to be super careful, and check on her every one to two hours through the night. I wrote over two pages of notes on everything that happened. Normally for an epidural that wasn't perfect, I would pull it out and replace it. But we both didn't want it. And ultimately, she delivered fine.
I can't begin to say how humiliated I was by the whole experience.
Yet I did everything I needed to do to take excellent care of her.
I was given signs--a lucky pin to pick up, a lucky moth in the elevator--Spirit told me I had PASSED my test.
Even on the way home there were signs in license plates and other words on trucks and things. 'Student First' made me realize I was still learning...
I also have been getting EAGLE symbolic messages from Spirit for two days. I stopped and wrote 'eagle' on my arm so I would remember on the drive home while I was at a stoplight. I knew I was going to have to look that one up.
Once home, I cried very hard. I haven't cried this hard over anything in a long time.
I wanted my son. I wanted my baby. As luck would have it, we just finished a weekend away with dad--then a day off school where he stayed with family but I worked, and then an overnight shift where he stayed with dad again. And here he was at school!
I think everyone from the neighbors to Sky Crew to Divine Source heard me, my loud anguish--over my life situation, my powerlessness, and my being a single mom.
Two important things came from this realization, as I could see and know everything is not real, and yet my emotions were telling me something important--I want more time to be a mom, and my life is just not vibrationally 'right'--including the time where I don't sleep.
The other important thing, is that I applied the Divine Mother Healing Love Key to myself, and it WORKED. I felt my pain go away, my mother's pain, and it really helped.
Release is important. When it is time to let things go, and discover perhaps the less 'acceptable' side of you--live it, feel it, experience the grief, and let it go. Let everything go to Divine Mother. Ask for All Divine Assistance from Source. It will be given.
For me, I 'quiet down'. I took a bath, then a short nap, before my appointments.
I also made a bracelet. Spirit named it The Diamond Bracelet for Liberation From The Torture. It's not diamonds but it's sparkly. And I needed the energy of it very much.
Jettisoning The Third Dimension
- tonight my assignment came out at eight p.m. It was for a procedure in the heart room by a cardiologist. I wanted to make sure I knew what was typical anesthesia for this. I texted a friend, no answer. I texted another and he called. It's like, 'have the heart surgeon available on standby in the next room'--BIG. It also involved major set up of invasive monitoring and medications for bypass. So I spoke up! I called my boss at home and asked, 'Are you sure you want me for this case? This is what is involved.'...He didn't know. He was in a hurry. I was willing to do it, but since I haven't done hearts for some time, a case where I'd need my skills in a hurry when it's been four years--might not be good. I also called two people while my boss worked on it, so I could arrive at the hospital ninety minutes early and have someone take Anthony to school. As it turned out, not only did I get a different assignment with a normal start time, but I ALSO realized just how harsh my working conditions are, and wanted them changed.
- The Eagle. After dinner out, we stopped by an art store. And there was an eagle statue! Spirit sure gets the message across. It's hard to describe, but one of a kind and made in Japan, and very different, in a nice way. Ross said to buy it. Then the sales man sold us some photo image coasters. Well he gave us extra eagle coasters for free, and the last sculpture--of the pair, for half off. I went home and looked up Eagle in my medicine cards--you have passed the trials and tests, and can now rise above and live by way of Spirit, rising High with Great Spirit...can you see the synchronicity with the bracelet, the eagles, and my situation with work--both Kuan Yin and the assigment for tomorrow?
- Today I had a Skype with a beloved Lightworker who was given a gift of great healing by another who was on the same line. This Lightworker basically complained like to the complaint department right after the introductions. Furthermore this one was deeply involved in 'etheric parasitic attachments and removals' and 'the black sun theory'. This is logic. This is THE MIND. It's not compatible with 5D, this whole concept. In 5D, there is love and respect, gratitude, and implicit understanding that things are as they are for the Highest Good and on an intuitive level everyone there in 5D just 'gets it'. Here is an excellent article on the same type of things--https://johnsmallman2.wordpress.com/2015/01/21/you-are-proceeding-full-speed-ahead-towards-the-moment-of-awakening/
- I refuse to engage in such conversations--and our Skype session ended abruptly with a second dropped call. We said our good byes. The energy was too different...between speakers.
- Yesterday a MEAN OB-Gyn whom Ross has described as 'deeply unhappy' when I have worked on gynecological cases in the main OR with, said, 'You should see my rabbit now. Once I started feeding it the right things--whole fresh produce instead of pellets--it is so cuddly and loving!' This was the piece the soul of this doctor gave to my puzzle which I will explain in the next dot. This piece is why the doc--who seems to need to stay in 3D because they are so 'worldly' and 'self-absorbed'--did something useful to 5D and my work. And goes to show 'you can't tell by looking' at who will ascend and who will not. Spirit has different criteria...
- I read a book on Women's Health by a Naturopath. I realized that our modern diet is a smoking gun...what are the ODDS that so many diseases can come from gluten, dairy, red meat and other 'staples' of our 'culture'? All the fake estrogens in pesticides and plastic bottles too? How could it be random to have so many unhealthy things we are exposed to every day, the 'silent killers' and 'slow poisoning' of the masses I suspect was on some agenda or something that was not for the Highest Good.
- Another very 3D nurse taught me that TV attraction is based on the 'likable' charisma of the actors...with this sympathy and closeness to the characters, people will spend a whole weekend just watching a whole season...it is no accident how this works...how TV becomes a part of one's life, one's self-identity (this is my show) and one's lifestyle (I just want to watch TV and relax all weekend on a 'me' day). She likes some show with an Opie in it, that's been on for seven seasons, and I never even knew was on TV.
- Same nurse has a brother in law who goes to Hackers conventions. Apparently there is technology to read a credit card from over one MILE away--with some high tech scanner. They flashed the partial names and numbers of people inside the auditorium to make a point. Furthermore, when people are on their cell phones in a restaurant and are annoying, her brother-in-law pulls out a device, presses a button and it takes all phones OFF the network for ONE HOUR. All modes--texting, internet and telephone--are temporarily disabled, no matter which carrier. If this is HACKER technology, can you imagine spy technology? And even further, GALACTIC technology? WOW.
I needed to go to our favorite restaurant. It was good to see the ocean, and listen to it. It was very deeply healing for me. For both of us.
And we also celebrated for Ross with this cake--Ross let me get what I like--because of my bad day.
My baby has it difficult. Sometimes this is a good thing, depending on the level of difficulty. Carla is being prepared for what is next, what will be asked for her to 'rise above' in the service of others. As an Ascended Master, life is not all about cake, although I like to eat it, and have a taste LOL.
It is about work and refinement of the ability of the soul, of the heart. And like diamonds who are cut to achieve their brilliance, or other stones and gems of high quality who are polished, or like the bible saying about 'gold being tested'...so it is with you in these next few weeks.
The curve ball that threw Carla at the end of her exhaustion is that after the tears, after the errands and appointments that cut into her lack of sleep, at the end of the school day on the nose Carla picked up Anthony.
His father's girlfriend is an aesthetician. She notified Carla earlier today by text that 'she had cleaned up a pimple and sent a cleaning regime that is gentle' . It sounded good, but Carla knew this in fact was illegal in the sense that perhaps the father did not consult the mother on this thing, for permission to squeeze and possibly cause pain to her child.
When Carla picked up Anthony, the pimple was red with infection, and as bigger than a quarter in area. There is no time to waste with antibiotics when it is this inflamed. Standard care is to use a sharpie permanent ink pen to trace the border of the infection, and watch it as it grows.
So after all this stress, and with all this longing to go to the beach to relax, Carla had to drive both of them home, find extra antibiotics (that would cover the infection) and treat her son with ointment and pills. In the car she did Reiki and the codes. But it delayed her plans by a lot.
Carla didn't fight it. She is resigned and agrees to do what is correct for each patient who is in her care.
Last night she noticed the aged OB-Gyn from the Middle East. She has noticed him come and go to four different hospitals, some at great distance--and her place too. He did a delivery, and had joy! With his tired body, his worn old hoodie jacket, and white hair, he is a masterpiece in what a soul can do with a commitment to a lifetime of helping others. Carla learned a lot from him and his work ethic...
So keep your eyes peeled (he puts hand over eyes as if to make a tiny visor to shield them from the sun) and I want you to be on the lookout for whatever comes next--be it jettisoning what is old, tired, and 3D in your experience, a 'lesson' much like Carla had, or a symbol like the eagle that is meant for you.
All of us here are watching! And everyone here likes what they are seeing with you.
(he gestures to take a picture with an invisible camera--hinting at the technology they have, their advanced capability, unlike anything we could imagine...He smiles BIG too.)
Aloha and Mahalos,
Ross and Carla the Reiki Doc Twins