Yesterday I was in a fog. A haze of having working three weeks straight with no time off, and trying to catch up on things to do, on my one and only day of the weekend without commitments.
For this reason, I wanted to just curl up and fade out for a while.
But I didn't. I had lots to do. I watched the sports for my boy. I went to UPS to return something to Amazon. I mailed bracelets and made four more, one was for the 'Going Away' party for Janet who is our nurse manager at the O.R.
Ross sent me to the discount clothing store in the area. I was embarrassed because I don't have anything to wear--not for the party, not for the fashion show charity event for my niece. My shoes are old...
I got two pairs of jeans, one pair of black leggings, two pairs of 'Italian Made' shoes, and one dress. On the way out I thanked Ross for understanding how it is to be a woman, about the clothes and wanting to look good. It is expensive. He reassured me he would help with the money, with this being discount store we would be okay.
I loved the feeling of having something new. I haven't had that feeling in a long time, possibly one year.
Ross told me to throw away the sweats I was wearing once I got home. Don't even donate them. He said, 'you will be doing a public service to throw those things away.' LOL! Gotta love my man! How clear guidance it THAT? (sigh)
Then I went to Michael's where I feel more comfortable. I was with my bead supplies! The sterling I use was on sale. And I had a coupon for twenty-percent off!
I was supposed to go get lunch, but I couldn't. I had just had yogurt before, and I skipped it.
I kept feeling all this turmoil and anxiety inside me...I just couldn't shake it. It had to do with the 'saying goodbye' and the 'celebrating with alcohol'...
Ross gently told me I didn't have to go to the party...it was okay.
He had me lie down on the couch. I rested deeply and awoke to the reminder to get the corned beef for Anthony. He loves St Patrick's day, and requested I make his meal for him before he leaves for school camp next week?
I couldn't believe I had forgotten! I had lost my checkbooks and only found them when I was looking for Anthony's passport--it expires soon and I need to renew it. If I hadn't been reminded about the property taxes--I would have forgotten about them too! It's like my head is in the clouds with all this Ascension stuff happening, you know? (this is a Karuna Reiki symptom--'time' kind of 'is different' and you get a little confused as you adjust to the higher energies--ed)
Once home I ate a burrito. I commented to myself as I was preparing it that I ENJOY cooking and it relaxes me. I wish I could make more of my own food...
Ross wanted me to enjoy some wine. Sometimes he does this to get me to talk. When he has me take off all my jewelry, and have some wine, I know there is a lot of deep measurements being made to my soul and how it is doing. I am monitored very closely. I enjoy energy upgrades too. My medical team has a lot to do...
There is something about me that is 'avoidant'. For example, my birthday was one month after my dad's funeral. My family wanted to host me a party. Well, everything was fine until mom said we were going to have Panda Express...
It was the last thing we had eaten together as a family before daddy passed!
I couldn't go.
I couldn't go to my own birthday party because I was devastated and in tears and couldn't drive.
So they sang 'Happy Birthday to Carla' and had my cake without me.
This morning the deep healing came.
My gold piece is a 'Timeline Eraser and Splicer'. I can edit life experiences for you or for anybody, including our story. All the learning will remain. But the connection to the past is as if it was gone forever and never happened...
Ross and I exist on two separate timelines in our shared past incarnation. I've made my choice--Ross agrees to my wishes--and we 'officially' are on the one where he lives to a ripe old age. Some traditions support this timeline.
Well, last night or early this morning, I ERASED the old yucky bad 'other timeline'...
And what came up?
The two weeks before Ross died, there was a huge celebration for him and his work.
I KNEW SOMETHING WAS UP. I didn't trust it. My intuition told me 'Watch Out ROSS!'
He didn't believe me. He wanted to accept the love and well-wishes from the people.
I felt terrible guilt for not being able to stop what happened...and it lingers to this day, even with my father, watching him die a respiratory death when I could have intubated him in a second and helped him to breathe and not suffer...he WANTED it that way...much like Ross 'wanted' to do what he was born to do?
My medical teams healed me.
I got permitted to keep the bracelet I had made for Janet's farewell. It is freshwater pearl and swarovski crystal--named 'Sayonara'...because goodbyes REALLY get to me in a big way...because of Ross and his dying the way he did.
I also was shown how to make a new bracelet, Divine Peace...
The self-cleaning oven protocol is complete.
Yesterday morning Gaia was put on 'Reverse Isolation'. Let me explain this in medical terms. In an 'Isolation Room' the person who is contagious is inside. The airflow is so that air always blows IN to the room, so that no germs can easily 'escape' outside to the rest of the hospital down the hall.
For 'Reverse Isolation' think of the boy in the plastic bubble who is so delicate and vulnerable, he can't be exposed to ANY germs whatsoever. So in REVERSE Isolation, the 'vulnerable patient' is inside a room but the airflow always blows OUT so no germs can get in to them.
Energy flows are OUT, directed axially out and away from Gaia at this time, to protect all the vulnerable, 'newly Ascending' ones from any attachments or outside interference.
Gaia further requested to make herself a 'Healing Spa' in a spiritual sense. All roads and freeways are now encased with Archangel Golden Healing Light--it can't be seen but it can certainly be felt. At all stoplights, every person present--animals too--will have their chakras cleansed and balanced while you wait! Every 'roundabout' will create a vortex to celebrate the Divine Union of the Goddess Divine Feminine Energy with the balanced and completely Masculine Christ Consciousness energy, and this will heal both those in the vicinity and also send the energy of Love and Gratitude UP to our Star Families when we travel on them.
The Hospital Room
On the drive to my mom's house to pick her up for the fashion show, my higher consciousness and Light Body was in a hospital bed. It looked like Dorothy at the very end of the Wizard of Oz with all the family around.
I told Ross it seemed as if I had just woken up from a very bad nightmare, and I was confused and trying to sort things out.
I was reassured by all of my Star Family present that indeed, the nightmare was over. They knew what to do to care for me next. It would never happen again. And I get to be with Ross by his side for as long as I wish, forever...and to relax and to rest.
Michael told me that I inspired him, with my faith and my trust and my willingness to always help others awaken.
Raphael gave me something, an 'en-something-er'--like a little gold web or puzzle that moved on its own, giving me great delight to watch the motion and the patterns to the movement that were always changing. (It is very healing, this device, for it adjusts the frequency of the person who has it and watches it).
Metatron was most kind, and gave me permission to call him, 'Metatron-ael'--as my personal name for him now that we are 'on the same side' again...and if I ring a cowbell any time he will arrive and come to my aid.
Then I asked please for cookies!
They were startled why I was so adamant about it?
I wanted cookies to give to all the nurses who would take care of me and to all the visitors who would be so kind to come...
A huge platter of cookies were given. Someone else asked, 'would you like chocolates for this purpose too?'
I said, 'I want them for me' and I showed Ross the molasses chips I like in the assortment box, and he said they were very good. Raphael declined because they were too low energy for him--'too rich and too heavy'...he is very polite.
Today without my knowing it, Divine Mother decreed for all her children to awaken from their sleeping in The Illusion.
I picked up on it without knowing it in any way except for what was written here...
Trouble In Paradise
The Charity Organization my sister and niece belong to is having political unrest because the new people don't want to follow the old rules. They keep rejecting them and voting for changes.
My sister, who has a senior, is 'entitled' by the old ways, which are like a pyramid system--to be treated to a nice 'going away dinner' for herself and her girl; but the new ones are balking at 'the system' and more of the cost is being pushed back on all the senior families!
In the past, only a nomination could allow a mother-daughter pair to participate.
In the old ways, one sister could be in but the next needed a nomination too. So did the daughters of 'Legacy' members...
Now this has changed. Sisters, and daughters of Legacy, can join freely...because people are awakening...and the old energies of separation are falling down the wayside...
(clears his throat)
There is one thing at this time I wish to say to you: I AM at Carla's side forever for all eternity; I never shall leave her. I go to her when she is awake, I watch her and comfort and guide her. It is both my pleasure and my deepest honor to be at her side through the dissolution of 3D--the Illusion of Separation both from God, from Spirit, from Light and from the vibration of Love itself.
Carla's courage to go through the life experience with me, when we were both incarnate--dwarfs my own by comparison.
For those of you who have Twins, you will understand what I speak...
Without her giving heart, none of this would be possible...
So with Carla, together, I erase what happened to us for the common good...only the lessons learned we keep, and the rest?
We begin tomorrow anew...for however long 'beginning tomorrow' will take.
We are in it for the long haul...
Aloha and Mahalos,
Ross and Carla