On Love

This is one of the most important things I have ever discovered in my spiritual growth towards Ascension.

It is also one of the most difficult to find the words to get across...

It is Self-Love.

There is no substitute for it.

Nobody else can give it to you.

Like the foundation for a home, any other relationships which are built without the foundation of genuine, honest lovingkindness to your self--will falter.

Yet for me, for years, the concept seemed both boring and unreachable.

My earliest years were filled with genuine self-love. I was happy and content just to be alive! I had no expectations, nor judgement of anyone I met.

Until I discovered friends called people like that 'stuck up' and made fun of them.

I learned to hide.

I hide it very well.

My close friend and babysitter Heather found that out about me about five years ago. She said, blurting out in surprise, 'you suffer from low self-esteem!'

I am quite adept at hiding it behind my accomplishments.

But I was found out.  I didn't have the slightest clue how to fix it. I'd been to counselors. I'd done Reiki daily on myself and others.

I just didn't have a clue!

Perhaps some of you have excellent self-awareness, self-esteem, and self-love?

Perhaps some of you are struggling with the self-loving concept?

What IS self-love???

I think it's a little like professionalism. It's hard to describe but you can sure notice when it is absent!

One starting point is to replace the word 'self love' with 'self preservation'...

Here is an example. I have been to three emergency rooms in two weeks.  My niece, my 'mother in law', and my son both have had serious health concerns.

My work has also been really long hours--long call shifts--which are exhausting.

I followed my heart and did what I needed to do to help my niece and my family. It has been three days straight of pushing me to my physical and emotional limits to get everything done.

Today I had the day off. I was going to sleep in but was woken up by my sister at six thirty in the morning. The docs wanted to give a transfusion, would it be okay? (by the way she is still texting me now...at nine thirty p.m.)

It was a good question. I spent time looking it up on the internet. I remembered leukocyte-reduced, irradiated blood products to reduce risk of CMV infection, from medical school, and I'm glad I was right.

Then I excused myself from her, and went back to sleep.  I spent the day in total seclusion.  I slept until ten. I even went out in the back yard, put a blanket out, and lay on the grass to get some sun.

I am a serious believer in the energy healing qualities of the sun. I had it cleanse, along with the violet flame--everything in my energy system.  I just soaked in in.

I needed it.  I knew later I would pick Anthony up from school, drive back to my work to see my niece who is in that same hospital, and drive back.

The dishes are in the sink. The animals are fed. Nothing has been tidied up. The mail is just sitting on the table where I opened it.

This is an example of 'self preservation' or 'self love'. I am in 'energy-saver' mode!

In medicine, your career will suck the life out of you if you let it. There is always someone in need of your skills. There is always a favor to give, a call to trade. It won't stop.

There are people out there like that too. Who ask and ask and take and take. They might not even realize it. It's just the way they are.

The second major point of today's talk is that you can take all that stuff that is taught in church about self-sacrifice, and take a good long look at it.  Being a good Christian or Buddhist does NOT mean to give every last ounce of your vitality away to prove your love for Creator!

When you are living a life from the heart, you give what you feel so moved to give. And you are always an outside observer of yourself and your actions. When there is imbalance, it is wise to put a halt to the energy flow.  And allow it time to correct.

The last point is letting Spirit guide you.  The more you can focus on the present moment, the more flexibility Spirit has to move you through your lessons.  I was in the Here and Now and talking with my sister on the phone this afternoon, when I saw what looked like either a leaf or a bird's wing in the spillover part of my fountain.  After I hung up the phone, I went and took a look.

It was a baby bird, with a few flight feathers but not all. It had drowned. Perhaps it had fallen while learning to fly? Or as Anthony believed, flown into the window and bounced in?

I found a container, and picked it up out of the fountain.

I started bawling.

I started with sorrow in my heart for Ross' death.  And for all the cruelty and suffering Earth has endured for generations upon generations. I cried for the poor bird who died, and for it's parents, who must be frantic.  I cried for all the animals who have suffered. For all the souls on earth, human and animal, plant and mineral...who have endured such pain!

I went through a burial, to wrap the bird in my prettiest napkins, adding flowers from my fresh bouquet, and my favorite Aussie Bite from Costco--with oats and dried apricots--like a healthy cookie. I took it outside and found a burial spot in the yard. I marked it with the lemon from Stephanie's bouquet, a fake lemon on a stick. The baby is near the nest under the eaves in the back yard. I told the nest--the mom wasn't in it--'mama I'm sorry'...

It was good for me to cry. And it is good for me to see how my sorrow is just always under the surface, raw...and to respect it about myself.  I've been through a lot.  And that's okay.

Does this make sense to you, the talk of 'self preservation' or 'self love'?

In essence, it takes a strong, healthy 'self' to be able to Love others in a healthy manner.

Be certain to take the time to know yourself, your own special circumstances, in all of your incarnations you can remember, and to stay in the moment carefully listening to your best teacher, which is your heart.

Honor it.  In doing so, you will honor you.  And then you will be able to love and enjoy others, and have the relationships which add so much to our lives...

In the end, your loved ones are all mirrors of you--teaching you lessons so you can have advanced knowledge in 'self-love opportunities' and grow.





Aloha and Mahalos,
Namaste,
Peace,

Reiki Doc

My Beloved? Give And Take--The Rains

Thank you.
Thank you for answering my call.
I just read this: http://sirianheaven.wordpress.com/2014/04/11/heavenletter-4886-believe-in-love-april-11-2014/

I am at the top of the stairs, spiritually, looking down at the view the climb of yesterday that was so much Spiritual Sweat for me.

It was an unanticipated Day Off. Although I got my wish--I did the paperwork and went paddle-boarding as I had hoped--my heart just wasn't in it.

I confessed to you My Sweet Beloved, My Honey, that secretly I wanted YOU to take the reins of my life, as my own way of making the 'rain' stop. You see, I have filled out so many forms in my studies, in my certification process, and in my establishing credentials everywhere I work (and maintaining them!)...I just can't make myself fill out another form....or keep on top of the paperwork.

You came to me, in Spirit, and said the situation is just like on the paddle board--you get out as far as you are going to go, then you have to paddle back in.

Could I hold on just one more day? And you gave me some advice.

I took it.

Was it easy after that? No. But I finished two of the three things on my list.

Long story short: after the ecstacy, the laundry is RIGHT!

Activities of a spiritual nature, and even nature itself, are so much more appealing to me now.

And the narrow, limited, day-to-day activities to keep my life 'in order' are so dry. Work, with all of my colleagues and patients, is wonderful. It's the filling out of forms and sticking stamps on envelopes that really drains me dry.

Now I understand.

Love is everywhere. But you can feel it more in certain ways--in the garden, with others, with connecting to God.

And God is there, even with the bills, and the checkbooks that get lost and make me cry and run to YOU, my beloved. I confide I am so dumb I feel like I am like this (take your finger and make your lips go up and down as you blow out and say that noise like buh buh buh buh buh).

Even this strange behavior to a Galactic becomes a source of amusement, and instead of feeling sad I am soon laughing with all of you instead.

I feel the love in my heart that is between us--it is always flowing--and to my pleasant surprise, it goes both ways!

When I am overwhelmed, there is a little extra from you to carry me through.

I will look for the Love today--in the flowers, in the sky, from Gaia, from the auras of everything alive, from the opportunity to burn off much karma on a 'fast-track'...like it is. Sometimes I think our lives on earth are like those accelerated classes that you take in high school to gain college credit--Advanced Placement Karma! LOL.

Today IS a whole new day. The slate is clean.

It's time to start it. There is much expected of me. Time to get ready for work.

I ask You to bless everyone whose life I touch today.
And to make my hands, my heart, and my intelligence filled with Your Presence to Heal Others.

I want the presence of both God, and the Goddess, in Perfect Balance and Harmony as much as possible to accompany me everywhere I go, the strengths of the Divine Masculine and the Divine Feminine ready to assist all I meet who are in need of Divine Assistance.

May angels smile, and shed a tear or two in laughter as they watch over my day...let the Light shine back to Home...and may our connection together, in Light, be bright!

I love you.
I thank you for your time, and your gentle explanation of What Is.

I thank you for this clarity that just hit right now--it was two kinds of paper'work' that tested me yesterday--not one. There was my own paperwork, and then the one that was brought to my attention because it concerned me.

I hope I passed my tests.

Your love is healing to my soul.

For those of you who are struggling, look down where you have climbed. What got you to your height is opportunity to experience Love and Life from a different angle. Sometimes the best views require a short 'hike' or 'struggle'.  Enjoy your accomplishment. Then, perhaps, the next time the road seems a little rough and the going is more slow than ever, and you do not want to take another step--look within, and connect to Source. Follow the hints, the nudges. Hang on for one more day, one hour at a time, if you must...

When you understand your Lesson it is as if the sun shines down from the clouds!

So keep paddling. Keep walking. And trust that you are loved, so very much loved, exactly as you are...even if sometimes you lose things, or complain...you are perfect just the way you are.

Aloha and Mahalos,
Namaste,
Peace,

Reiki Doc

P.S. Self-reiki twice a day is important. And know that once you read, like, or Tweet Doctors With Reiki, you are given Reiki healings--two times daily--for free--just to help with your own Journey--if you accept it. All you have to do is say, 'I'd like that' and 'Yes' with your intention, and it will be so.

There Are Many Different Kinds Of Love To Experience

There are many different kinds of love, all of them healthy, all of them enhancing and strengthening the aura.

Let us talk about them a little...

Self Love:
Things you can do to make your life more healthy and enjoyable go a long way in healing the planet. Why? You might ask? Well, as your vibration increases, your aura grows stronger, and your auric field is one of tranquility and love instead of struggle and frustration.

With that I am going to share some things that I have bought or experienced recently, that I think are great and really helped me to enjoy my life experience:

• The Squish Collapsible colanders. https://www.google.com/search?q=squish+collapsible+colander&client=safari&rls=en&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ei=Hn4SU8_YAeXN2wXoyoHACA&ved=0CHwQsAQ&biw=1624&bih=852  Why? because the regular plastic colander takes up too much space! I make pasta once a week. The colors and the concept really help to organize the plastic container drawer (well, glass with plastic lids, and BPA-free plastic for lunch boxes.)
• Zing On The Go Liquid Squeeze Bottle: I'm a lunch packer. And I enjoy making my own salad dressing with oil and vinegar. These little guys are just the right size, don't leak, and come in your favorite bright color. You can even match your chakra you are focusing on with this!
• Naked Earth Organic Red Wine:  it's amazing the difference, not just in taste but how you feel after. Now,  I'm not Wes Annac; I don't enjoy lighting up. I'm French and Italian combined so one glass of wine with dinner every once in a while does it for me. If you prefer some other 'substance', go for it. I went to Berkeley. I am not here to judge anything or anyone, if you ask me. However, if I am going to put you to sleep for an operation, I want to know every recreational ANYTHING you take so my drugs and yours don't 'mix'...
• Paddle Boarding: I plan to take every opportunity I can to enjoy this new activity.
• Yogurtland:  I don't like things that are too sweet. Some of their flavors are AMAZING.

Self Care:

I am ticklish as one can be. But I am overcoming it in order to enjoy a mani-pedi once or twice a month. It is good for me, with long hours at a very 'masculine' line of work, to slow down and enjoy being female. This is work for me to surrender to my Divine Feminine, and play it up. I'll never be a 'mall enthusiast'. But this is some movement in the right direction. Make some time to relax into your vibration, and gender can sometimes be a big part of that. I also have an excellent relationship with my 'gay boyfriend', my hairdresser, and I go regularly to that too.

Relationship With Your Twin Flame:

(lightning and thunder just struck! LOL!)

Seriously, it is raining like stink today outside!

Anyhow, before we meet out Twin Soul, it is best to work on our own issues, and to be open to their presence in our lives. (More thunder, : ))) )  I would light candles, sing songs like A Thousand Years while I drove, for him. And I raised my vibration. This is the single one thing you can do most to enhance your opportunity to be together. 

Be okay with not meeting them. Let go.

When I was introduced, in meditation, I couldn't see his face. I thought, well, how boring is that? We're stuck with each other FOREVER! And now we know who is who...

I couldn't have been more WRONG (loud thunder and lightning).

<3

What is best is how within this relationship it is deeply healing. Even when I am present, and things 'come up' that don't sit well with me, I bring it up. He doesn't get upset. (super heavy downpour).

He loves.

To be honest, it takes him (lightning.....now loud thunder) a while to 'get it'. He is galactic, and in a slightly higher vibrational state than I am. But because I am a medium, we get to 'connect' like I do with others in my mediumship work.  We talk. I can feel him physically. And I see him very clear. 

For example, I was concerned about how the galactic idea of monogamy is a little 'stretchy'--not that I am sure of it, exactly, but I have heard and read enough to know. I blogged about it.

Then I let it go.

The next day, my beloved came to me, and softly said, 'My fidelity to you is a gift (lightning--now the roof is rattling with the thunder) I give you every day.' 

And I realized how in my hurt and pain I didn't understand how 'being galactic' doesn't apply to ALL galactics. Just the same, my fidelity to him is a gift I give from my soul every day too.

Service:

Giving of nurturing, warmth, love and compassion heals both ways. (thunder).

In my work with my patients, I am a continuous source of Reiki for my colleagues as well. I have done much growth not to complain about the physical discomforts--the long hours with no breaks, and the many times I am hungry and thirsty (lightning). As a parent, as a daughter, as a sister, as an online teacher and friend...

If you find you are lacking in the happiness area of your life, be sure to do what you can to help others who are less fortunate than you. Then give thanks for your opportunity to help them. You are able bodied and in the right place and right time to be of assistance in their time of struggle. 

In the Higher Realms, this type of energy exchange is what makes entire economies 'go'--mutual benefit, mutual exchange of Light. After all, Creator is so freely giving of Himself, and also Mother Gaia is exceedingly generous of Herself too. We are their children, and have good example to follow in our life.

Take good care of your piece of heaven today.

Aloha and Mahalos,

Namaste,

Reiki Doc

P.S.   

Love and Happiness by the Reverend Al Green

http://youtu.be/hsU6_eSG4k4

I dare you to dance!

I dirty dog double dare you!!!

P.P.S. Ross gives this post a big thumbs up. He approves of what I write too. And the thunder and lightning has stopped with Al Green. ; )

Love Is The Solution For Everything

Please look carefully at the photo of this child kissing its 'baby'.

There is an energy to it.

I want you to feel it.

It is the energy of Unconditional Love.

Love is the Strongest Force in the Universe that exists.

Love is stronger than hate.

Love is stronger than death.

Love is stronger than loneliness.

Are you ready? Let's move on together...  you have the power to create your life...

Love Yourself:

• You are flesh and blood that is combined with Spirit. Honor this connection to Source.
• Honoring spirit requires quiet time relaxing in nature and doing something you enjoy, even just for fifteen to twenty minutes. (Surprisingly, some of my most 'spiritual' time is my commute to and from work each day. I turn off the music in the car, and pray.)
• Your heart has a 'mind' of its own--it is a direct 'connection' to Source/Creator/The Divine. It's not very loud at first. This is why we honor spirit in quiet time.
• Think good thoughts--here is an example of the daily thinking Masaru Emoto does. Please note he gives thanks for things he wants to have happen in the past tense. This is not because of the Japanese language. This is because Masaru Emoto knows it is a powerful spiritual tool, to pray for what one wishes to experience in the past tense:   When I wake up in the morning I sit up and I settle down. Then I gaze at a glass of water pre-placed at my bedside. For about thirty seconds I verbalize my gratitude by saying 'I thank you, and I ask you for a nice day today.' Then I drink half the water. Next I think about what I need to do during the day. With the feeling of success that I imagine upon completing each task, I say to the water, 'Everything went well and I thank you." Then I drink the remaining water. By doing so  good information is sent not only to the water but to the moisture in the surrounding air.  It is possible to resonate with both the water in the glass and the moisture in the air. I get up and I go to the bathroom. After relieving myself, I say 'thank you' to the flushing water with my feeling of gratitude.  I then take a shower. The shower water includes chlorine, and it is not good for the skin. Love and gratitude is necessary to improve its hado (energy in the water). This is especially important for those who have skin problems and might not be able to install a shower filter. It is a good idea to tape the words 'thank you' and 'love and gratitude' on the wall of the shower room to improve the hado of the water.  When I have some time in the morning, I try to go for  a walk. Basking in the morning sun brightens my heart. While I walk leisurely, I think of positive things.
• Exercise strengthens the aura. Light, gentle movement is enough. Try to get some activity in your schedule every day. If you are busy  like me, park your car farther from the entrance to the store. Don't take the elevator, take the stairs. Stretch in your work day. And do what you love to do--for movement--when you have the time.
• Certain things weaken the aura. Educate yourself about them. Some topics are high fructose corn syrup, conventionally grown food, and GMO. Others are more easy to understand, but take a life change--hard alcohol, recreational drugs, tobacco, gambling, loud music, violent entertainment, and gossip have an energy-weakening effect. 
• A weak aura is prone to illness and negative energy attachments. (this is a subject of another blog post, you may look it up using the search box.)
• If you have been denying yourself something you want, find a way to give it to yourself. Being self-sacrificing is not healthy for you in any way. Love Yourself First.

Love Others:

Aren't these two bears simply adorable? That is how you look to Source--simply incredible and full of love and joy and creative energy from Source. Source cannot love another more than you! 

This is because we are One--all of us are connected to Creator. Some might have it be more easy to see than others, that is sure! Sometimes I look at their behavior and ask myself, 'what are they thinking?' We do not become a doormat or a pushover when we acknowledge our common 'spirit' that we have in one another; instead, we refocus our gaze to look past all the 'not so great' behaviors to the core of 'source', and respecting both parties'  common connection to Source, we then act from this 'perspective'.

Every individual you meet is actually a mirror of some part of YOU. It will help you see what kind of energy you are sending out, and how your personality is. They are your Teachers. 

In a way they are giving you a wonderful gift by being Present with you just the way they are; it gives you a choice on how to interpret that 'lesson' and incorporate it into your daily life. 

You in turn, are a Teacher to them.

Gather Together For Strength:

Have you ever seen an old couple who were getting up in years? His hearing wasn't so good...and her eyes were terrible! Together, they helped each other make up for their weaknesses. He helped her to see, and she helped him when he couldn't hear.

When we gather with like-minded people, our spiritual ability increases. Our auras strengthen. And we share our 'pieces of the puzzle' in the big picture of Life by being exactly who and what kind of person we are! It can be over a cup of coffee. It can be with friends to take a hike or enjoy some aura-increasing activity. 

What is recommended at this time by The Resistance Movement is to meet with the same group of people, be it a large group or a small one, every Sunday to share the meditation for the Weekly Liberation Meditation. Together, our energies combine and increase the energy of Gaia for the better!

These meetings should be in person, if possible, and do not need to be long in duration. Together you will create a support system for each other for the time of The Event. (when Gaia gets restored deeply and completely).

Look to the top right hand corner 'count down' for the meditation. I do the YouTube one, which is called Meditation number two. http://2012portal.blogspot.com

Aloha and Mahalos,

Namaste,

Reiki Doc

Self-Love and Reiki

Imagine your heart as a little box that has memory for everything you ever thought or did.

What's in it?

Mine used to have a lot of doubt, worry, fear, anxiety, dread, and wishing for something better.

Is that any way to live?

Then I got Reiki. I took Reiki classes. I found Reiki fellowship and friends. I started twice daily self-Reiki practice.

But it didn't change what was my 'status quo' of negative self-talk, and 'preparing for the worst so I could be surprised by the best when it happens'.

Then, a teacher gave a book that was channelled by an entity called 'Gunter'. I read a chapter every night before I went to sleep. This book had spiritual growth inside it, along with exercises, so that is why it was just one chapter a day and not the whole thing.

I learned that thoughts are 'things' and they are very powerful.

Think of a fish tank full of water, and all the fish are swimming around in it. Guess what happens to the food and the poop after a while if you don't have a filter? It gets yucky and stinky, isn't that right?

Well, Earth is like a giant electronic 'fish tank' with all of US swimming around in it. And instead of food and poop, every THOUGHT we ever have goes directly into this 'electronic cloud' around the planet.

An not only do our THOUGHTS have the ability to create patterns in our own lives, but the SUM of them helps to create what happens in society too. This is called 'the collective consciousness'.

So a lot of Gunter's teachings focuses on how to 'edit the thoughts' and to 'assess the feelings'. This is because THOUGHT + EMOTION = POWER TO CREATE THE FUTURE EVENTS THAT WILL AFFECT YOUR LIFE.

Read that equation over and over, until it starts to make sense.

All of the work of Louise Hay is the application of this Spiritual Fact towards the betterment of one's health. It is like the Law of Gravity. It is another Law. Although it has been called 'The Law of Attraction', that brings up in my mind friends who try too hard to control their life for the creation of financial resources.  Just think of it as 'Co-Create'.

So---one very effective form of self-love is to rewrite the powerful 'self-talk' that goes on in one's head.

Now I am moving on to another 'phase' of this 'process'. I am wanting to make my life better, and finding the VOICE I lost so long ago with my personal power.

I have been in a funk over paperwork the past six months. I hate it. I am not the best organizer, and I never know where to 'file things'. To be honest, when given the choice between life in Spirit and life on Gaia, I chose the path of Spirit every time. It was more fun! It felt more natural! And with a moon in Gemini, I travel just as often as I can! I like to 'get out of the house'.

I also accepted some B.S. about 'as a women it is my duty to bless (clean) my home for my family.'

I struggled.

I used to spend entire weekends cleaning the house.

Then I gave up. I just did the basics--bathrooms, kitchen, laundry, and meals.It wasn't worth the 'drill sergeant' to make the kid clean up either. I was exhausted and in need of sleep.

It wasn't until I noticed at the hospital in the O.R. that they have a team of people working full-time to clean the place that I 'woke up' on that one. It isn't just the O.R. itself--it is the nurses' lounge and the doctor's lounge and the locker rooms and the toilets.  Cleaning takes time, which I do not have. I am the bread-winner and I work full-time.

Here are some examples of self-love I am experimenting with:

• Looking into a maid service that I trust.
• Balancing my checkbook register.
• buying lots of nuts and RAW energy bars for my bag at work so I won't starve.
• asking a huge favor of a friend who lives close to the hospital to let me stay over there nights when I am on first call and get out of the hospital really late instead of sleeping on a gurney in PACU.
• going outside and sitting in the sun (it energizes me and clears my aura)
• signing up for delivery service for groceries.
• focusing on making good memories for myself and my son.
• reaching out and putting time into friendships and family.
• yoga! yoga yoga yoga yoga yoga.
• eliminating 'not so healthy' food from my diet to help me have more energy.
• buying a few new summer clothing items from Tar-g-t just for fun.
• Allowing myself to experience what I am feeling in this moment NOW (this isn't easy for me)
• giving myself permission to make two small mistakes and one big one every day. (just make sure you don't keep repeating the same ones. : )   )

Self-love is important. Only fulfilled and happy people can reach out and support others. For example, this morning, my son would like crepes filled with nutella and bananas for his breakfast. I have a late start, I am up early, and now is the perfect time for making them. He is going away to his dad's this weekend, and I can give him a nice memory before he goes. Usually mornings are quite hectic. But with a 'full cup' of my own well-being, I am able to assist him and help make his life experience more pleasant just because my heart is able to think of it, and want to carry the plan out.

Namaste, and Aloha,

Reiki Doc

The Charlie Brown Tree

To my left is a six-dollar Charlie Brown Tree in a four-inch pot. The golden star on a stick is shining. The tiny ornaments that bent the top with their weight are half-bleached by the sun. What day is it? February 24, 2013. Christmas was two months ago!  And yet only now I have the 'courage' to admit plant growing 'loss' and toss the whole thing away. Not even to compost it!

When I saw it at SavOn, it was at the register in the plant equivalent of 'Traumatic Full Arrest'. I was good with plants, but not that good. And not with this type. I had killed many a Bonsai tree of this type of bush in my 'wanting it to be a hobby' days. There is a knack to the art of Bonsai, mainly, good outside space, plenty of light, and plenty of time to care for it. And of also not being afraid to trim when it is growing in the shape you don't want. I had the 'eye' to see the shape of my Bonsai in natural trees and mimic it with my hand. I terribly sucked at actually growing my own Bonsai. I switched to Ikebana where I have been more in my element...

My sister, bless her heart, is struggling with yet another broken heart. In her confidence to me, I picked up we had a lot in common: being attracted to the complex-difficult partner, pushing the 'nice ones' away, and being utterly confounded at why 'he cheated on her' when she asked 'for someone to be the Real Deal' up front.

She has a lot of waking up to do.

I know, for I am finished with my self-discovery of who I am and what makes me tick. Many times the symptom of molest is the ability to have all of your life in order but your personal life is a mess. 'It takes one to know one', so to speak, and I have, 'whatever-dar' to pick up those who have been through this trouble like myself.

Everyone knows about it but the person who is suffering from it. It is very much like the person who has agonized and plotted over 'when to come out' and when they do, the people in their life are like, 'we thought you would never come out'! 'The homosexual in the closet, much to their surprise, had not been fooling anybody!

So, if you are like us, and seek interest in a Charlie Brown Tree of a partner, STOP. If you suffer from one heart break after another, you are on the WRONG PATH. Turn around and go back into your Heart and LOOK. Just like in the picture above of the Crystal Cave in Sequoia National Park, go to that locked gate of your subconscious, open it, go inside and take a good look around. Around you there are mirrors that are other people and how they treat you. There are 'lessons' to help you learn more of your Truth about yourself.

For if you do not love yourself completely, adorable warts and all, you are in no position to love anyone else.

I have just come out of the cave I fell into and landed sharply on my 'bottom' eight years ago. That was at the end of my 'string of long failed relationships'. I crashed and burned. I said 'no more'.

I decided I had to be there for my family, to be strong for them, and to survive. I had a lot of healing to do when my ex clearly moved on, and I still had to interact with him for the sake of the children. Once his cell phone was in his back pocket while they were being 'passionate', and left a twenty-minute message on my answering machine, oh babies, yeah baby's, moans, the works! Fortunately I chose 'not to take it personal' and deleted it at once. Being witness to their lovemaking was a terrible knife through my heart.

But by being Open and Being Present, by Following Joy and a lot of Careful Observation, I got out of my jail that I had put myself into to survive from my trauma in the first place! After survival, many of the symptoms, hypervigilance, hyperarousal (a tickle makes you jump two feet up, you startle that easily), avoidance of triggers, and recall of events, affect the survivor with PTSD.

Reiki has helped considerably. It has helped me to stand on my own two feet and open up to work with Spirit on my Healing. This did not happen overnight. It has taken just as many years 'after the memory' as 'the memory was buried deep in my subconscious'.  I learned that I was blaming myself, on a deep soul level, and buying into a lie to protect the abuser. I did not consider myself worthy of Unconditional Love. Just like the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree, I wanted to be loved into my true splendor by another. But life does not work like that. And my 'love' for other 'shipwrecks' only pointed to how terribly off-course my own life path had been in the Heart-of-Hearts department.

I am thankful for all of my patients, my friends, and my loved ones who I have had the opportunity to share Unconditional Love--the lovingkindness from my heart to theirs. It was ultimately their Love and Persistence, and Gratitude and Acceptance, that made me see my Dis-Ease in not thinking I was 'worthy' enough to let all that Love in. Only from Heaven. Only from the Higher Dimensions, everything was able to be processed 'normally' by me. That is the headquarter for Unconditional Love, a healing power in the Universe that has nothing to do with 'taking it to the next level in relationship'.

It just is. In the Here and Now. And it is Wonderful. It is waiting to come into 3D, and lift you up to everything you have wanted to discover about Love and Life and Heaven. All you have to do it 'act as if', do your Lessons-Homework on your soul growth, and work hard at self-liberation from Untruths.

Once you come to this Truth, you are ready to step out of that Cave, and into the Sunshine where you belong. Dis-Ease dissolves completely, once and for all.

This is my message to you, baby sister, from your Sister who loves you so much. I am sorry for your heartache. I know the dreams you had, of a home, family, children. I know the emptiness that drives you to these 'relationships' with sharks of men. A snake is a snake, and a seeker must be light on her feet and alert to weed out the predators from the 'good partners'.

A man will tell you he loves you with his actions, with the way he looks at you, and the way he listens to your heart.

He doesn't have to say 'what you want to hear' to 'prove his love for you'.  If anything, to me it is quite the opposite. The 'poets' are the ones who are more interested in 'the chase' than anything else in Life. The one who is worth waiting for will go through the lessons in the Muse song, 'Madness' to make sure that the attraction is worth his interest. And will take his time until like the song by the Cure, 'Close to Me' to let you know he has made up his mind. Then YOU are free to select if 'he is right for you'. If it is, it is a 'match' or a 'stick', something mutually compatible for both of your Higher Development. But never a 'match stick' to burn up and disappear. If for any reason you are not comfortable, the Universe will send another. Just you wait!

I have to go. The mobile missile launcher Nerf tank has me under attack. The kids are trying to get me off the computer. It is a beautiful day, and I must go.

Aloha nui loa, for mau loa. Namaste,

Reiki Doc