Thank you for your kindness.
This has been a hard week. I feel out of sorts. This latest lesson is difficult.
I think long story short, Ross can see how people have the capacity for kindness.
This kindness is especially healing right now for me.
Anthony was late for school two days in a row. I have the week off (I was supposed to go to conference in Maui, but his father doesn't want him missing school, so I chose to stay).
Yesterday, he was witness to my grieving over the planned cutting down of two pepper trees, my guardians, and also, my connection symbol from my guardian angel Laetari to me.
He told me yesterday afternoon, as he suggested we go to Dana Point, catch Magikarp, and reach my goal for a Gyrados, and even that we eat ice cream (both activities I had wished in my heart and not told a soul...usually it's homework, homework, homework and cooking and cleaning for me)...
He told me during my tears before school that day, he was talking to Ross the whole time. He asked Ross if this was a test for me? Was it for something that had been taken away from me in my past life when I was married to Ross? Ross had said yes, but not to tell me until the afternoon. Anthony told Ross he thought the test was cruel.
I still am in shock, and have been for most of the day.
Anthony was late again, because we were calling the Association, Veronica Huerta, and letting them know we don't want it cut.
We heard the saws first thing as sunrise off in the distance, and a landscaper lead pulled his truck into my space. I asked if he was going to cut down the trees, and if he was, to get out of my parking space, because he's not welcome to park there. I had tears in my eyes.
He said it's a different team, not his, to cut the tree; he empathizes, and he showed me he put the chainsaw into the back of his truck where it can't be used to chop anything while his workers are there.
Immediately I made the sign of the cross and dropped to my knees for this small miracle.
Blessed Mother and my guides promised me a miracle as I woke up. And I was inspired to reach out to my friends online, and ask them to help. Many have and this has been a great comfort to me.
The Lead from the landscaping company said those are two healthy pepper trees, and there is no reason to cut them.
The response and support from others online who feel the same, and have cried over trees, are helping me go step by step through this journey...this lesson...this pain.
Yesterday the trees told me to pick bark off them for me, and for Anthony, and also as many little tree shoots. I went to sleep with the scent of fresh pepper tree in my room. They are giving and kind, even in death...
And this morning when I hugged them, they told me to be strong for Anthony, after I told them, 'I DON'T UNDERSTAND! and yet I TRUST something good will come out of this.'
I let go of the outcome.
No victory is every possible, no miracle, unless one lets go of the outcome.
Either way, I grow, and hopefully, I am given a reprieve from this loss, if it is for the Highest Good.
What we are having here in the United States, from the recent election, is a perfect storm for my soul.
My PTSD in my soul DNA is acting up. It's seeing the mobs/protests who want Trump 'out' (or DEAD), it's knowing there's something more going on behind the scenes organizing the crowds but I can't put my finger on it, and it all reminds me of Ross in his last days.
I am a gentle soul.
I want peace.
I wanted my husband to be by my side for a long life, which wasn't to happen.
I know on one level--both then and now--it is all Illusion, however, it is exceedingly painful to me.
Ashtar was very kind, and offered me support in my healing, and asked me how I felt about things that happened to Ross so long ago? I gave words to the agony. I found the loving support of his best friend to comfort me. And the trees have been bathing me in their constant love and support, and promising me they will never leave my side, and will always protect me.
Since this is a lesson, the only way to heal it, is for me to experience it and learn it.
This is why Ross isn't helping me, and I am working it through on my own, as much as I can, although I am needing more support than I thought I would, and it is helping me very much.
What Ross sees is outside the Illusion. That people are good, that they open their hearts, although they are at risk of being pawns in some ugly game.
I know for the people who were violently against Bush--both of them--they were picking up on something I couldn't even read or know--that the Dubyah was an archon incarnate--and they reacted accordingly.
This morning I watched videos on YouTube (I added them to Truthseeking). There are so many on the other 'team', and you can see with the camera the hidden signs, and signals, and anchoring.
My assessment is from both sides we are screwed--both from those who promote protests of Trump, and for those who support him--because every single one HRC or DJT is on team Those Who Do Not Have Our Best Interest At Heart.
The only way out is to be love in everything we do, and to daily go to our inner space where we are one with Source/Creator, and to relax and allow whatever it is we need in that special time.
These are chezzu (mulberries). Although they are sweet, they stain the hand of whoever picks them and eats them.
It is my hope that the things I see--in Spirit--with Madonna, Miley Cyrus, and the rest (look up the YouTubes on them...they are HUGE with Those Who Do Not Have Our Best Interest At Heart)--will be visible like the stains of the chezzu--to all who have eyes that see...
This is my angst, that so many are on that team, and so many more have gotten away with terrible things (for example, there is a certain sacrifice one must do to reach thirty third level in mason), and so many have no clue about what is hidden in plain sight...
Just like with the Pepper Trees on my street, I say, 'I don't UNDERSTAND! and I TRUST' that this hidden hierarchy too will be removed from our reality forever, and people will be sovereign again...to learn and grow while they are incarnate on Earth.
Why would I put you (or your Higher Self or your team put you) through your latest test?
Do you want to know?
Anthony wanted to know.
You passed with flying colors.
You remained in the 'I feel' mode throughout, not resorting to anger, and you were always loving.
You stayed in your center by focusing on your love for the two trees who have shaded you while you and Anthony play catch, the ones who catch your eye every single time you come to your house, and turn your car to go into the garage.
You didn't lash out.
You kept it clean.
And I know you were dying in your heart of hearts, in agony, for I too have the connection and I felt it.
You were RAW.
You were honest.
And you didn't hide the tremendous emotion you were experiencing. Not from your team, not from your son (our son), not from our readers.
You didn't over eat. You didn't dull your senses with drink.
You didn't try to force anything from your own free will.
You noticed by opening your eyes there are a tremendous amount of beautiful California pepper trees just like it in your neighborhood, and you hadn't have noticed them had it not been for the loss of your own.
All the trees offered their loving support to you, in spirit realm, in ways trees communicate to psychics but not to others--as far away as those by Anthony's school.
What have you learned?
That talk never solved anything, that LOVE is the only solution, when it comes from our souls.
That people of extremely low vibration (for example, your association, the management company, and the gardening company)--operate on a totally different bandwidth from you, and are totally blind to the subtle vibrations of the trees -- or the neighborhood, and ramble on, trampling everything in their wake?
Your lesson is finished.
You won't have to say goodbye to me, ever again, not I in the form of a tree, or as a galactic, or even how I was incarnate and was destroyed by the mobs in the flesh and died a horrific death.
I kiss the top of your head, and now I bless you.
Your challenges have helped others who aren't so clear to SEE. And hopefully, to live their life with a little less 'blindness' and 'out of focus' to the subtle things of the Higher Realms.
I love you.
I'm taking good care of you tonight honey.
With all my soul and my heart.
Aloha and Mahalos,
Ross and Carla