Life has changed in so many ways for which I am grateful.
Even though work has been slow, I prefer it.
And on my day off, I covered for another, and as it stands I ended up with a worse assignment than any of the others...yet with acceptance I made my way through it, and kept my head up!
I came in for two short cases first thing in the morning. Then there was a gap. I was to do a portacath insertion, but it had been double-booked and in the lineup of someone with a lower call number (worse lineup of cases) than me. But actually this one had continuous work!
My surgeon and patient for the last case had a miscommunication through the office. Patient showed up on day surgeon had off so surgeon could go to dentist. Dentist usually takes a long time. Patient waited in pre-op for five hours for surgeon. And I was to do the anesthesia.
There was some dumping of responsibility on me. Both by the person I was covering for part of the day (rain, heavy rain, and wanting to stay home after her son's school concert)...and from my boss...who saw the scheduling conflict and wanted it fixed without having to make the phone calls.
The funny thing is, trying to call the surgery center from the outside is miserable due to the phone system. There is no back line. So you call and have to listen to find out what three-number sequence to press to get the part you want on the inside. So the nurse supervisor my boss wanted me to call wasn't answering her cell, or her texts, or accessible by this phone!
I didn't let it get to me.
Instead I just took the two hour gap and went to see mom. She had been confused yesterday. I changed her stoma bag. I had just done it on Monday, and it was time.
Except for red swollen legs I didn't see any signs of infection to cause the confusion. She was very docile and sleepy. Perhaps it had been another stroke? (my sister came to check the blood sugar--it was normal).
The difficulty here is that my mom is very controlling and particular about what she wants. And what she wants isn't good for her health.
The doctor says she needs to lie on her back with her feet up for at least twenty minutes every day for the swelling to reduce.
Mom only wants to sit in her chair. Even for sleeping.
There was a horrible smell of feces when I entered the house. I smelled like c diff.
The caregiver had offered to check the diaper (adult pad).
Mom had said no.
Mom doesn't like to change her clothes or brush her hair.
So as I did the diaper as well as the bag, I assessed her perineum and her skin integrity. The caregiver was amazed at how humble I was, to make sure everything was okay, even though it's dirty.
I saw redness and explained both the need for barrier cream, and not letting her sit in any position for more than two hours to let the skin recover. Take the excuse of walking her to the garden for a short break.
You see, my sister bought the fancy recliner, for sleeping and it can also make mom stand up.
Mom hates it.
Ross wants me to talk about the butt. I was surprised since I haven't done exams in a million years, I was surprised to see how loose and large mom's anus was. I made a note of it. And when I went back to work, my surgeon who is a general surgeon and a mom, I asked her just to make sure--is this normal? She laughed gently and said she has noticed how some get looser with age, just like everything. And she said with the chronic constipation it's sometimes goes with it. She said many drugs, especially the neurology ones, are very constipating. First thing she does is look at a med list, and change some things around, and the problem goes away quick! What meant so much to me is her kindness to listen with her heart and reassure me that mom really was 'okay' in the butthole department. It gave me peace.
Ross asked me while I was working with mom, was it okay for her to go?
I gave a conditional yes, very tentatively, and I said, 'please make it so I may have time to grieve'. With nana, I was back at work two hours after she passed. It was horrible. And with my dad, the very next day I started a new job. I couldn't cry.
Ross is the gentlest heart when these things happen. I know about life contracts, and dates, I told him. He actually had been extending hers for some time now, to help me.
I was grateful.
For the most part, life is exceptionally good right now. I have shorter days at work. And last night Anthony and I made a pizza. They have the dough in a can. And I use tomato paste, lots of oregano, and we had cheese I let Anthony shred by hand. Surprisingly enough this simple meal is the one from his childhood that has given him the happiest memories!
The work here is coming along well too.
I have some adventure planned in the next few weeks and months. Internet might not be readily available, as well as time to write.
So if I 'go dark' on you, without warning, do not be concerned as I will be back--in a week. The Reiki healing will always be sent, regardless if I post it or not.
I still watch the 'news' online, looking for clues.
These two articles show me that the unseen hands are desperate, and are seeking to destroy society by attacking the doctors. This is always a key step in any takeover:
Here are some frankly disturbing articles--that show how far gone we are as a whole:
- Ways to hypnotize yourself through the TV to forget your binge series you just watched so you can binge again 'like new'
- Exposing the corruption and deceit of mainstream news
- This is no accident--DNA modification by GMO/DNA manipulated things to eat
Don't worry--just know that all this is coming to the surface like a skin infection bursting pus as it is ready to heal.
I see what Ross and his teams are doing.
The intervention is more intense. Almost like a cowboy movie. They are not just sitting on their ass like they had once seemed when I first met them. (both literally and figuratively).
And yesterday Ross sent me this image:
It was as bumper sticker of a spear-fishing enthusiast, and I was disgusted at first because I like octopus. They are smart and cute.
But I walked back and realized what it meant.
The tentacle thing had been conquered by those who adventured to go into an unnatural environment for them.
It's not 'the octopus'.
It's everything that is reaching everywhere into our society that is not from the Divine.
Those who have slept through the whole thing are going to awaken to a beautiful new life!
Remember that being present in the Here and Now, making a point every day to review (in writing if possible, your handwriting) one happy memory--the taste, the sights, the sounds, the smells, the feeling in your heart and on your skin--will help strengthen you emotionally. This will help you if you are exposed to shocking memories buried deep within, or shocking events going on around you on the TV. Concentrate on the good, and when the time comes to heal from the bad, acknowledge it and release it. Don't relive it. You've lived it once. That's enough...don't suffer!
And get yourself into a feeling of gratitude for being alive.
Yesterday I read a story of a woman who had her feet bound in China. It was horrifying, how at age two, the mother broke the bones with a stone, and bound them. The pain of her toenails growing into the soles of her feet. Even though it brought her high standing as an adult, it was sad. So I went to sleep last night thanking God for my feet. Normal feet. Not bound.
Everything happens for a reason.
Everything happens for the best.
We are in the best of hands.
God loves us. The Divine flows through us and within us and back to Source--Creator of All That Is.
Angels are freeing us right now with all of their might!
The hardest part is behind us, truly, it is.
The next part is going to be enjoyable, in a big way!
Carla has a late start today.
She has half an hour later to be at work. And she has almost exhausted it.
I awaken her each day, before the alarm, with a message. This morning's was 'God Will Have A Joyous Awakening'. Carla had to use the toilet, got up, and wrote it down.
By the time she was washing her hands, after, the alarms went off. There are two, one on her phone, in another room, and a small travel alarm in her bedroom. So there she goes, turning them off, one after the other. Then there is this moment --the time is four thirty am!--where she talks to herself and asks, 'can I have more sleep?' and 'do I need to get up?'...
Invariably she gets up. She gets to her post creates this.
My wife, my partner and twin gives up two hours every day to write this to you.
All without pay.
All from the love in her heart.
Love is the only thing there is.
Everything else is but an illusion and a bad one (technically flawed and distorted) at that!
Enjoy your day.
We will send the healing.
We will continue to encourage you.
Until it is needed no more.
Aloha and Mahalos,
Ross and Carla
The Founders of Doctors With Reiki
"the head honchos" Ross jokes...