Ross sat me down this morning. I needed to talk with him, he said. And after we finished, he said I have about a ninety percent understanding of how things work.
The good news is the icky, out of sorts feeling I've had this whole trip has softened...and I believe the reason I was sent here to my favorite place in the whole world was to be given the truth...about who we are...and why we are here.
I am supposed to break it to you, those of you who have eyes that see and ears that hear, and have been working on it.
Here is the easy part...
My consciousness is awake and okay with all of my many past lives. What is aware and in me as Carla is totally connected to my other lives. Basically my memory is intact. It's the combination of the memories and the feelings from who I was. I have been a temple girl (not sure where), a princess several times, a queen, a soldier (yes a male, as well as a female!)...and of course, Ross' partner and twin. Before I remembered, many things in this life gave me much pleasure and joy, more than normal, and it was my soul remembering that which I couldn't. Indian food, for the first time, was like, 'where have you been all my life?'...I felt love for the culture, the food, the music...a deeper love than one would expect for a college student in Berkeley who was in her twenties, you know?
The whole point is not who I was, this is about you, and who YOU were in your past lives...when you reach a certain point in your Ascension, you will know in your heart by making the connections. You will have memories nobody else could have. It's not because someone tells you. It's not a whim. It's part of who you are.
When you discover your truth in this way, there is a feeling of satisfaction, of completion, that the nagging questions about why you are the way you are--sort of a 'wow, that makes sense!'--conclusion about the whole thing.
One of my past lives was the daughter of Kamehameha. That one wasn't so happy. Because of my 'mana' (spiritual power) I was cloistered and my marriage was political.
Another was Liliuokalani. There's so much more to that one...however, it explains why on my first trip to Honolulu I had absolutely ZERO interest in seeing the Iolani palace. I had aversion to it, and I couldn't explain why? It turns out, in the history books, Liluokalani was held on house arrest there for several years, I forget how many, but it was a long time.
The integration of who I am, together which who I have been, for me, has been an effortless one. I don't overthink it, and I accept.
Along with this, other things are increasing with the energies, to the point where telepathy is a tool I use every day to communicate, particularly when I want a favor or something done. I think it, and a microsecond later, the person brings it up as if it was their idea.
I pick up people's 'stories' too, intuitively. Not perfectly, but close, very close, by the process of claircognizance. This is telepathy in reverse, so to speak--how I receive information through this spiritual 'wifi'...
As for manifesting, in general, things are starting to work out as I keep my thoughts 'high and tight'...more sleep when I'm at work, leaving a little earlier, help with the child care...more routine which I love. It's not perfect but on the whole it is markedly improved since the past few years.
Gratitude plays a huge part in everything. Yesterday I practiced gratitude. It's more of a way of life for me.
The 'searching' is much less, as well as the need to 'do things' as earlier Spirit has many tasks for me to do. Now I get a little more freedom. I don't have the 'push' to write. And for the delicate things like this, Spirit lets me take my time and process it.
Early in the Awakening I enjoyed the presence of my guides often, and I could ask for signs and I got them. Now, later on, I sense they are fostering my independence as a soul. I ask, and they will come, but they aren't always noticeably with me.
In essence, I enjoy and promote peace and harmony in all I do, and my inner world harmoniously reflects my outer world--in body, mind, soul, spirit, and purpose. I am a teacher-healer, I've been one for a long time, and I help out when asked to be of assistance in both the seen and the unseen.
I also have compassion for those who are struggling to awaken, and to step into their truth.
I know of one who couldn't detect a dark one--it was understandable given the situation. The dark ones are experts at this deception too. It led to total and immediate destruction of everything that had been under the care of this soul--a whole planet. The soul was devastated, and still is. But it functions. This soul is trying to prove to itself it can detect such things...in its own way the soul is trying to undo the past. Souls do this. I'd say the detection rate for this soul is probably fifty percent. And when there's another who can detect when it can't, it goes ballistic. Absolutely, positively, explosive on it. Because it's too close to home. That's when all people get angry. And this soul keeps punishing itself--and projecting onto others--because of the one lesson is has yet to learn. It could easily compensate by attracting others who have exceptional detection skills--who still aren't perfect--and to work together to heal this sore spot.
It's okay.
Souls have time.
And lessons sometimes take long time to learn. Incarnations and incarnations.
This soul will find its way. The soul on a soul level knows what to do. I have peace with this...
This morning I had a beautiful swim in my 'office'...I snorkeled and saw many fish. I saw sail fishes with their fantastic fins. I sneaked up an an octopus too. It knew I was watching it, and I felt it's intelligence as it tried to hide in a tiny hole in a rock. I saw the big eyes and the siphon gills moving, that's it. Not one single leg. But both of us know I saw it. It wasn't sure I would harm it or not, but it played safe just to be sure.
But what startled me was the yellow tang. There are hundreds of them here. But one charged at me.
Not once or twice. Three times! I don't think it liked my camera. I've never had a fish get mad. But I saw it, I felt it, and it swam fast at me with fins out to make it look bigger three times!
At first I didn't know what to think...then I smiled. I realized you must be close for something to feel threatened and get mad at you. And yes, I truly was swimming in it's 'space'...
Now for the hard part...
This article really caught my breath.
We are almost 'there'.
'Why not invite your Higher Self to come see through your eyes and help co-create your reality? You have nothing to lose?'
Right?
First hurdles--our society--people 'sell their soul' down here. That's not good. That's why, one soul, one body, one lifetime, no problem, right? We are taught to be careful and not let other souls/spirits IN.
Then there's the 'nothing to lose' part--who says things like that? Those who trick us, right?
'Why be a scout with a memory problem?'--that's right on target in the article, because basically, that's what we are...
That's why I put the 'hint' from spirit with the cover for the magazine from the hotel--Meet The Creators--at the top.
What ARE the Creators?
Why is this Illusion?
That's why Ross sat me down.
What are we? Why are we here?
Ross showed me an image of someone clicking through the stations with a remote--watching T.V.
There is an essential curiosity and desire to discover that is unique across all living beings in the cosmos--and our Reality (what is actually Illusion--in their words) is a means to promote that for some beings who are 'Higher' than us.
Ross says it's not to make money like down here with the television. It's done with Love.
Then Ross showed me where I snorkel. And all the places I have snorkeled. They are each fascinating places, little nooks with rocks and coral and fish, each one different. Yet here on Hawaii, they are all Island coastline, or a short boat ride from shore. And water is water. It is all Ocean. The divisions of the oceans into names is all man-made and artificial. The ocean and the sea is One. They all connect.
We are all Consciousness.
Consciousness is like the saltwater on earth--no matter what--it is the same. Ross says Love is this energy, this Consciousness--the unique combination of intelligence and love which gives LIFE--much in the same way the seawater gives LIFE (and our bloodstreams are not much different from seawater here on land, too).
So Creator is the source of all Consciousness--Divine Mother and Divine Father--like all the oceans put together on Earth.
Then me and you are like the little inlets, each one different, each with its own unique composition of fish and rocks and coral....and somewhere between Creator and Us is a Higher Self who made it possible we could be here as we are.
The way I understood it, as I reflected on Incarnations and First Incarnations and Aspects...is a Higher Self--for example, Archangel Michael--'sponsors' an incarnation. A full incarnation is a being in its own right. And as the incarnation learns and grows it reflects well upon Michael. When there is need, a second incarnation is made, a full incarnation--which has certain strengths and abilities Michael put into it--and yet this too is a separate soul, and has a Purpose, Lessons, and friends and family and work. The aspects of Michael aren't full souls. They are sent to earth, but aren't as completely sponsored. To be alive as an aspect feels like a full soul--but in the sponsorship there is only so much energy that is given. I'm not sure what happens to aspects later on. Yes technically, everything I have described is still 'Michael'. It's multidimensional. And it doesn't make sense.
I know soul groups are over souls that split into pieces, and the group reconnects as One at the end of a creation cycle. I've seen one such soul group reunite. They are close friends and communicate often and help one another through life. I know schools of fish and some primitive humans share one community 'soul'--and act like a fundamental unit of consciousness.
Soul families/star families also are know to reincarnate together. For some reason their Life Purposes align and they do this.
How I deal with this is I tell myself I AM my Higher Self. My HS looks through my eyes every single day.
It's a little sad to realize 'Carla' is a chapter in a book that one day will close, and yet I AM will go on past this chapter, much like I've done before with my other previous incarnations. I'm attached to this 'Carla'...that part of Ascension isn't as fun. Because 'Carla' wants to be with Ross forever and ever, and be DONE with everything once this Ascension is complete.
This brings me to the part I thing may have inspired the Council...how I said how it hurts Divine Mother Incarnate when all these other people say they are HER. It hurts me too for all the Mary Magdalen's out there...one of my many past lives...It hurts me too for all who speak for Gaia. It's not right. There's only one incarnate, as far as I know...
Could one be telling the truth and all the others be incorrect?
I won't say yes, and I won't say no on this one.
Does Divine Mother Incarnate do a whole lot of work on behalf of those incarnate on Gaia--things no other incarnate one does--even though they say they are HER and take the credit for it and have no knowledge of the blessed and intense spiritual work She does?
Does Fran Zepeda 'speak' for a part of me I have no control whatsoever? Does she channel something? Is it from the light or the dark and how can I tell?
I have no answers for these.
Only this--if you throw in a bunch of archangels, with their incarnations, second incarnations, aspects and more, add them to the over souls with all their many soul fragments--is duplication possible? I don't know--I don't think so--everyone tells us we are 'unique and loved' from Creator.
Can it be a huge confusing multi-dimensional mess that no one would understand or even think of here who is incarnate?
I think so, yes.
That is why, like the first one, Ross informed me, simply, that the concept of the Ocean and the Inlets and the seawater--is done with LOVE.
Not to control or dominate (like the dark ones).
But for the Highest Good in ways we can't understand except that we take Ross' word for it that it is Love.
Could my Higher Self have 'sponsored' more people than just me? I wouldn't put it past Her. After all there have been so many PAST incarnations, why stop at just one character living them all? Time, up THERE, doesn't exist, right?
This brings us to the concept of parallel lives. Shared lives. To be honest, I don't 'get' any of it.
I think that's the ten percent I don't know.
Ross never asked me to write this. Yet I could tell by his demeanor he wanted me to. I could tell by the release of the icky feeling and out of sorts--I always get the icky feeling and out of sorts before a memory comes up from my PTSD--it became calm again.
At the end of the day, I pick gratitude.
Gratitude for the balmy breezes, the ocean with the fish, and the chance to swim.
They keep telling us over and over again, the guides, 'we are One'...
I hate to think that I am imagining you, and you are imagining me, as this seems cold, and heartless. Under the concept of Illusion--down here on earth, anything goes, right? When I say 'imagining you', I mean that there is some 'Virtual Reality' we are engaged in, and perhaps, everything is 'virtual' in ways that make sense to people like Ross and not to us. I know my deceased grandfather told my mother 'it's like a movie' and 'you can create the reality you want' and 'you dream it the night before and it happens the next day'.
I couldn't fathom how this goes, how it works, and why it would be like this in the first place.
Why would we ever choose to incarnate and be like Drew Barrymore in Fifty First Dates?
Because everything is Love.
And we get to fall in love with life every day, just like her character falls in love with Adam Sandler.
Because Consciousness is Intelligence and Love put together, and it wants to grow.
Consciousness for some reason DOES this.
And whatever we are--incarnation, second incarnation, fourth incarnation, aspect, soul group --- we are here for a reason and we are deeply LOVED by Creator of All that IS, both Divine Mother and Divine Father.
WE are the creators...at least, the co-creators...and this never ends...the adventure, and once we are through with 3D and duality, we will co-create in a field of nurturing, warmth, love and compassion, for all eternity, for the Highest Good of All, without end.
Aloha and Mahalos,
Namaste,
Peace,
Ross and Carla
The Reiki Doc Couple
(this time around--Ross smiles)