'Lemons' are another word, in my opinion, for 'Lessons'--which are experiences that your Guides and your Higher Self agree are 'good for you'--and you have to experience them in Life at times perhaps when you would rather not.
Yesterday was a classic example.
It was a tight schedule. I needed to get to the dentist and then pick up Anthony for his basketball practice. But the school had scheduled an 'Art Show'--I'd wondered why Anthony never brought any of his artwork home from the Middle School--from five to six-thirty for the parents to come and see.
I rearranged my work assignment--I should have been out by one p.m. at the latest.
I was looking forward to a 'good' day--on my terms, some sense of control, some chance to enjoy my afternoon and accomplish things that were long overdue.
For example, in the gap between my cases, I called the insurance company and straightened things out. Long overdue things, for like, two years. And I contacted my payroll company (I know it's stupid--I work for myself but I pay this company seventy dollars a month to write my own paycheck to me) with other questions that had been put off for five years.
I had the luxury to eat, to enjoy, and to go visit my patients in their rooms from yesterday and write the notes.
There was a case only a cardiac anesthesiologist to do, I was the first available, and it was scheduled after a procedure that takes most docs twenty minutes but takes this provider an hour every time...it was DELAY on top of DELAY. (I cancelled my appointment, which had been long overdue to clean my teeth--they were surprisingly understanding)
For the second provider also 'took his time'.
Was it a medical emergency?
Could I say 'no'?
Not really. The one who did a favor for me on Monday when I wanted to go home, I owed the favor back. I couldn't push it.
Was it nice to be needed for my skills with risky cases? (and this one was a 'doozy')...yes.
I was able to put in the arterial line in such a short time the new anesthesia tech was surprised I was 'in already', and had to throw away a wire because I didn't use it.
I enjoyed the company of the staff present in the O.R.
I also felt a connection to the family only I could give, I felt needed.
It's been a short week, I had traded tomorrow (today's) money-making position to be able to attend graduation at the school...and this case would help...
I found this case and the dumping it on me--the on call cardiac guy was in the heart room all afternoon--there are four of us who can do hearts, two are actively doing them--I found this case to be an EXERCISE in neutrality, impartiality, confidence, and trust that 'things would work out'.
Let's fast forward to the end--the 'show' is over at six-thirty, but the 'worker' who kept Anthony was off at 'six'--and I fought traffic leaving the hospital at six-ten.
I arrived at six-fifty, therefore according to the 'worker', I owed FIFTY DOLLARS to the school--that's right, a dollar a minute.
Was I delighted to see Anthony's art work? Hanging on the wall, even though it's late?
Did I ask for help? Another parent? A sitter? Anthony's dad?
The case kept seeming like it would finish, because it took twice as long as most of this kind...and Anthony's dad had 'work and things to do'.
Here is the lesson I could never in a million years have predicted: as we were walking out of the school, Anthony saw his father and his father's girlfriend leave the Japanese restaurant next to the school and quickly drive away.
Anthony was hurt.
I was devastated.
Not just for the fifty dollars I could have saved.
But for our son's heart.
He kept trying to figure out if it was him? Really him? Why would he do that? He must not have known about the art show?
I showed him the text--it had the show and the time.
I told him perhaps they had seen my car?
Then he shared that it makes him angry when his father does things like that.
In the same breath, he muttered, 'what can you do?'
I said there are two things in a situation where you can't control the outcome that you MUST always do:
- the first is to always know how you feel about it
- the second is to confide your feelings to someone you trust
Otherwise it stays in, and hurts your health.
The poor child has a stuffy nose, a sore throat, and was dehydrated. They didn't have access to water for him and he had been playing basketball (he totally missed his practice). His water is in the classroom, which was locked.
I learned a lesson too.
I took him to the Italian restaurant he'd been wanting to go to since a classmate's family took him.
He drank both his and my glasses of water.
Once, when I was on a date with my second husband Frank, early in the relationship, when it was time for dessert I said, kindly, with a smile, 'get what you want'.
This--to Frank--was when he fell in love with me.
He said, in his culture (which is Mexican)--this personality trait is called 'gracia'--and because I had gracia he knew it was of great value and his heart fully opened to me.
Yesterday, I realized the value of gracia to heal, to make an amend, and to help support Anthony in HIS lesson with his father...
I ordered the same exact thing as him, and we shared the same exact salad--because he needed someone to validate him. We had the caprese salad and the chicken marsala with risotto.
I also got him the box of kleenex from the car, for his nose.
Why do we have these lessons? Both of us?
I don't know.
For me, I saw the data points--call early to line up help if there is trouble getting home, call the school, ask Anthony to help figure out a solution--and I took note of them.
I also saw the data points with Jared, and my needing to contact him too when there's trouble--because like it or not, he's family, and Anthony needs both of us to look out for him.
In summary, when life gives you Lemons--they don't have to be a bummer--you can get creative!
Lemons are my trade.
I build with them.
I build hearts.
Look at the wonderful increase in Consciousness I 'built' in Carla...
I am methodical.
I want you to look for it in your lives--your lessons are provided to you in your 'language' in only ways that you can understand.
Just yesterday morning, Carla's cousin confessed to her his heart, his struggle...
She encouraged him, and used the words--words she typically doesn't use, mind you,--'you will find your way'.
He accepted her support.
And in his day, out of the blue, he came across this song--look for the tiny blue PLAY button up and to the right
He had mixed it many years ago.
He didn't sing it, but this song has his 'mark' and is the product of his creativity.
He felt Heaven had touched him, in a special way, for him to find that song, and it meant deeply to him hope and support and validation in his struggle.
(Ross has his fist up by his chest, fingers towards him, and he blows on his knuckles in the gesture in America which means--job well done that I did--and finishes the gesture by brushing the knuckles back and forth on his shirt--ed)
I orchestrated it.
Aloha and Mahalos,
Ross and Carla