I had been noticing a lot of changes in the world. Part of me has been looking to this time in the hopes that 'everything would be okay'. I wanted to feel the moment, to be in the moment, and since my son had no school on that day, I scheduled an overnight call on Obstetrics in order to be off with him at that time.
A colleague of mine left town this weekend, leaving the others to take up the slack. Both of us on call overnight, the main OR anesthesiologist and myself on OB, did not get sleep and were given the assignment to work all day.
I made a six o'clock appointment in the morning to go over the restructuring of the contract with the rest of the group with the embezzler who is in charge and in tight with administration.
I went straight to the Main OR after, and asked to be let out first, as was my right as the OB anesthesiologist post-call.
I went to the gastroenterology suite and started my day.
EGD's and colonoscopies and ERCP's on people as old as 98. But I had warned those I worked with that once 11:11 hit, I would be taking a one minute of silence to observe.
I got antsy. I saw on facebook that my friends had already had it, and they were one hour ahead of me.
At 11:00, as I sat at the front desk in GI, I felt it. Just like at Circle right before, when Spirit arrives. A tingly electricity in my whole body, one like the anticipation felt before a much-awaited event.
It lasted about thirty seconds, then it was gone.
As we started the case, the patient was difficult to anesthetize. Kept reaching up for the probe. I had to hold the hand down and inject propofol at the nearest port, because it was taking too long for it to take effect while I was injecting further downstream. I found myself wishing for A) patient to hold still and B) it to end quick. Between the charting, pre-op note in the computer, PACU orders, and this patient, I had no time to think.
11:11 passed while I was doing this. The procedure ended at 11:15. I was devastated. I told my friends in a text.
One said, 'it will come again tonight!'. I knew by military time we use in the hospital, it would be 23:11 and not right. (She was sweet and texted me again right before so I would not miss it but I was fast asleep).
Another, an ER RN, said, 'you did the right thing'.
Today, there was a message on YouTube from a subscription I follow. It is channeled and has pictures of clouds. It lags one day behind.
11-11-11 at 11:11 opened the portals to outer space. The 'worm holes' if you will, to allow inter-space travel. Much like on Star Trek.
One of the last suggestions given for the moment 11:11 that would happen at that time in each and every time zone, was 'to be in service'. The Hawaiian RN was right!
I did the right thing.
Next big date is 12:21:12. Time to start counting down. And the energy of the opening yesterday will continue throughout the time in between.