Divine Creator keeps moving me along in my own spiritual development. Refreshed, I went back to work on Friday. I find patients are being sent to me who need that 'extra' touch, and I gladly provide it. Two weeks ago was a woman who was terrified to get dialysis, and was needing access for dialysis. Her son had died from lupus at age forty-two, and he had been on dialysis.
Gently, I shared with her that my mom had been on it. I gave her a box of kleenex and listened to her and soothed her. She asked me to write down my mom's advice on dialysis and I did--four points--EMLA cream to numb the graft before dialysis, picking the best person with the needle to the the only one at the facility you'd let access the graft, unsalted Ritz crackers to soothe the stomach, and to plan to rest at home for a bit after dialysis to allow the fluid shifts to complete. I saw she was terrified, no family member present, and ask, again, gently, do you need a hug? She nodded yes with her tears, and I held her frail body in my arms for a brief hug in pre-op holding.
I knew she wouldn't remember any of the surgery, and it would be fine for her. But I took the time (unpaid time!) to reassure her that she would feel better once her dialysis filters her blood. She must feel yucky now. And our family has had two kidney transplant recipients...She was delighted.
Just this week, a patient was very afraid. After I gave medicine to help them relax, I overheard the surgeon and patient talking. The patient had been through foster care and an unbelievable number of schools. The surgeon admitted his own mother had been adopted, so he understood what it is like not to know the parents or grandparents.
In the recovery room, this patient said a big THANK YOU to me. From the heart...
As we move along at the hospital, all three OR requests from staff for 'religious exemption' have been granted. It took a conversation about religious beliefs for about an hour, protocol most likely, since these workers were highly skilled and impossible to replace in a short time.
I still await the decision for me, although we are very short staffed and I had to work post-call the other day.
Last week took a lot out of me, emotionally, physically, mentally. I'm looking forward to this week, a slower week. I have Jury Duty, but fortunately on Monday I can make my eye appointment, because the Jury didn't need me that day to show up.
Yesterday I was going to rest at home, but family needs got me to drive way farther than my comfort zone...I went because I wanted to spend time with my niece and nephew and sister and brother in law.
It was a long drive. I had to go into a gated home in the countryside/foothills. I parked on gravel, I haven't done that in like, forever. I wandered up to the house, not sure how to get in. I was greeted warmly. I asked for the restroom and was shown it.
My sister was nowhere to be seen. But she texted me that Uncle Bobby was going to give me a tour!
I had no idea who Uncle Bobby was at the time. But he came up in a golf cart, and gave me the tour.
Immediately, I asked him about the Botero sculpture next to the pool. How did he ever get one of those???
It was a long story, a garage sale find...delightful.
The photo above is from part of the tour. I took it. He offered me the cross, but I said no thank you, it's beautiful just as it is, and deeply moving.
Uncle Bobby is an artist! A successful, contemporary artist, who even has work on display in Times Square, NY. And his land had a gallery, an art studio, a clay studio, and a chapel.
I adore art! And I felt like I was getting a transfusion of joy to see and appreciate all the works on display.
What was fun was that Uncle Bobby sort of 'gets it' about the world of Spirit and the Afterlife. He's been deeply moved by art images in the church. He has a book written called, 'Keep An Eye On Your Soul, Creating Change Through the Arts' that's been helping prisoners turn their lives around in Canada for ten years now.
My sister told him I 'was spiritual'.
He was delighted to talk of things that others usually didn't want to hear in the family--we spoke of how Spirit is real, and the physical/senses/our perception is the dream. He's had some experiences that were deeply moving. One was a photo of a nun taking confession from a priest where there were Dutch style doors to the confessional. There was St Paul there. Apparently he was beheaded in his martyrdom. But he showed me how the picture with the spirit was there.
He also spoke of the Trappist monks (most Ascetic of them all) who used to be Knights Templars and how Thomas Merton was a Trappist. I was like, hmmmmm....his step-son had worn a very dark, dark, inverted star tee shirt to my niece's birthday party.
There was no judgement, but I could tell Discernment wasn't 20/20 focus in that family. The artist's heart was good, and he loved his pets. The deceased ones are buried in a beautiful grotto next to two Blessed Mother Mary statues. And a family was going to bury their bulldog pup who accidentally drowned right there today...
I'd worked very hard on the drive there, spiritually. As I drove through a military training ground for seventeen miles, I did the Jesus prayer. I remembered how Svali had lived near there, and described her family going there to practice at night--driving silently in the car, with the headlights off, to not create attention. I thought about how the dark military was right there, hidden in plain sight...and I was deeply moved to ask for Divine Help.
Little did I know at the end of the road I'd be working even harder!
Since I was in a new chapel, I knelt on the floor at the rail in the front, and I prayed the prayer sequence to get a wish when you are in a new church--three Our Fathers, three Hail Marys, and three Glory Be's. It's only the first time in the new church. But I made my wish for Uncle Bobby. So he can reach out to more people with his incredible ministry in his home. His wife, Aunt Ann, is an artist in ceramics...she was very nice too.
The stepson had terrified me at the birthday party months earlier, because he has a pit bull puppy. Now it was eight months. The jaws are massive. I can never forget the injuries I've seen professionally from such dogs. So I spent the entire time, hours after the tour, entertaining and protecting my niece who weighs like, thirty pounds max. My sister, too, helped to keep the dog away. I was told it was a Pit that had all the terrier breeder out of it, it's gentle...I'm not easily convinced but the dog was well behaved and didn't try to take anything from the table (food) in both the barbecue area and the table and kitchen.
It was hard for me to open my heart to the stepson, but I did. And I'm glad I did. It turns out his brother died from drug overdose related circumstances ten years ago. The mother was heartbroken. So close to tears.
When you are nourished in spirit, and I was from the art tour and the prayers said through the very slow traffic on the way there--you can. You will know when it's asked of you. You will just know.
Did I spill the beans with Uncle Bobby?
No.
I did tell him I know of my guardian angel, and his name is Laetari. He really liked that.
Uncle Bobby and Aunt Ann gave me an open invitation to visit. And Uncle Bobby promised I can paint with him too. I made him pinkie promise!
People are so close to awakening, and even though Bobby and I are on the cutting edge--one day hopefully soon the general public is going to crack. He told me how his awakening was when a Trappist monk put him in a room with a monstrance. There was a table with a cloth on it, and the monstrance. (a thing that holds the eucharist for adoration of the body of Christ). He wasn't sure if the trappist had left to go get something and was coming back, or what he was supposed to do in there by himself. But then, there was a sudden drawing of his consciousness to the monstrance--he could see his recently deceased mother through there, and also, he just KNEW in an instant with his whole being that Spirit was REAL. It wasn't an 'I have to think about it' or 'remember it and reflect'. It was like BAM!
Hopefully (Ross assures us that we are) on such a precipice and awakening is inevitable. And this Saul Message points us in the same direction.
P.S. I share what happens to me, first hand, in Medicine, on the Front Lines, so that you will know it doesn't just happen to me. It happens to everyone who works in my capacity. And the people in the Operating Room. And on the wards. The work expected of us is to do cognitive skills and people skills work almost like machines. This is the legacy of Big Pharma, which is a cousin to Big Oil and most likely Big Tech. It just IS. You need to go though whatever you are meant to go through to help you awaken. And we have staff awakening right and left, just slowly. I won't be able to keep this up forever. But I will have fun being 'in the thick of things' until it's my time to stop. And my career is firmly placed in God's hands, and I'm letting God decide how I best can serve for the Big Picture. <3
(Ross chuckles. He sees all the Big Picture, and he has so very much love. For us all.)
clap! clap!
Aloha and Mahalos,
Namaste,
Peace,
Ross and Carla
The Twins
