Wednesday, June 12, 2019

Are We There Yet?





The Council says yes we are.

It has to do with the energies. I have both felt and visualized Heaven in my meditations for about one week now.  Apparently we are bathed in the energies we are supposed to reach at our destination. And furthermore, it is a matter of 'going with the flow' and 'letting go' and 'letting it happen'.

Okay, fine enough, that sounds good to me.

What I'm not certain about, is, what are those energies going to do, and when, and in what manner or sequence?

I look around me, at the general population, at the workplace, on the road, in the schools, no even to mention in the realm of 'entertainment' or 'information'...and in my opinion there is a huge gap between what I see/feel/experience with my five senses, and what I know is 'business as usual for Heaven' with my sixth sense.

So there you have it.

Five days, three days, negative one day (that would be June 18)--does it make a difference?

I don't know.

The Council will probably say something mysterious like, 'the helping hand is the one at the end of your arm' as we approach the countdown.

I do know everyone is sent for a purpose. And it's getting clearer to me what the purpose is--at least, it's super clear some of the obstacles at my work I face. For example, people in general in my department don't care if I live or die. As the Chief of Surgery described my boss and those who act like him, they are 'service to self'.   I realize clearly my boss has a job he wants done, and that's about it. There's no sick leave. There's no helping for sick leave. The guy whose wife was very sick and died, and took off to go to China to tell her family, and we covered for him for six weeks--yesterday I told him I felt awful and wanted to go home. He wanted me to relieve him anyway. He didn't care. then I saw the picture of his new family on his phone, his daughter Grace is beautiful. I commented on his family (he got someone pregnant practically at the funeral, started a new life, and even bought a boat!) and he smiled and said his daughter is waiting for him with the wife at the beach, they love the sand, and he told me how they say sand in Chinese and how his daughter says it.

Yup.

Pneumonia?

Sand.

At least I see the truth.

It is what it is.

I've been in stress and fear mode for so long my body wore out. I'm late for work! I have to work sick. Cases need to be done.

You know, the charge nurse of main OR PACU told me everyone at work is sick and on Levaquin. All with what I had. I must have gotten so many patients and coworkers sick. So I work at a place where the vaccination thing is a huge deal. Gotta prove it. Or wear masks. First for flu. Now for measles. It's a big thing. Yet, my gastroenterologist had a dry cough yesterday when he was working. Just like I had!  He's in private practice. Lost days means lost income and yet the office expenses must be paid. The overhead. So...everyone looks the other way. I know surgeons who cancel lineups where they are sick. Some do. But not all. And some work with deadly diseases--pancreatic cancer, stage four lung cancer...until they can't work any more.

My goals are:

  • work hard at everything I do, doing my best to listen to Spirit. (I bought beads day before yesterday because I knew someone needed protection, spiritual protection. Then the order came in the next day!)
  • keep out of 'stress mode' as much as possible.
  • rest because I'm not getting any younger
  • practice self-care in the mornings--a routine--and also a different routine at bedtime
  • think good thoughts like Andy Bojarski says to do
  • think less in terms of currency, and more in terms of what I want. This aligns me with the powers of co-creation.  I want my house paid, free and clear. I want the old house to sell so I can enjoy the freedom of my new life. I want this new house minimized--all the 'stuff'. Today Anthony started working on his part. My soul is screaming for Hawaii. I want it and I visualize it, exactly where I want to go, exactly what I want to do. I mentally see a chaise lounge in my back yard and friends having fun here. I see peace like a cloud over my colleagues, and people helping one another. I even dare to visualize everyone having the perfect schedule they want. I see happy faces, contentment, and joy in every interaction. Spirit can bring you Hawaii. I've gone and stayed at a friend's vacation home before, for free (well, the cleaning fee which was minimal). It doesn't have to be money. Spirit is bigger than that. It's not what you know, it's who you know, and knowing Spirit is a good thing!


Anthony graduates from middle school tonight. I must dress up. Now that I've thinned my wardrobe, I only have one dress. It's easy!

I also bought him a nice card. And a lei. 

I'm so proud, and also, very emotional, because my little boy is growing up. He's not a baby any more. 




Ross has been near and helping, but he doesn't have anything to say. He says he doesn't want to 'ruin the surprise'.



clap! clap!

Aloha and Mahalos,
Namaste,
Peace,

Ross and Carla
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