Facing My Higher Self

I will give you a little perspective on the 'getting to know your higher self' process, how it is going right now for me, and then I will share with you--at Ross' request--the actual transcript of what went on yesterday with Spirit and my Higher Self and me.

What Spirit thought was going to be like this:

bright and hopeful

beautiful and deeply enlightening

Has actually turned out like this:

It's a cat fight. I don't like her. Not one bit. I don't like the CONCEPT of a 'Higher Self', I don't like anything even remotely related to me.  And not only can none of the Galactics or the Council understand it, they find it FASCINATING and are watching and taking lots of notes.



Long story short, in the car this morning on the way to buy breakfast burritos, I leveled with Ross:
Her needs are met, mine are not. She is soft. I don't like it.

He snapped his fingers as he held his right hand up and said, 'I'm on it'.

Instantly he played his song for me, the one I always know is from him, and I really listened to the words this time, and they meant so much:

Pompeii by Bastille

http://youtu.be/m326LNIRB3k

The next I know, a friend from Australia is private messaging me. She is going through the same 'dark night of the soul'--and says Ross is putting a hibiscus behind my ear, and says he is Right Here.

To a native Hawaiian, which in one lifetime I was and completely remember--this means I am taken, if I wear it on the left ear. Ross is saying I am taken by him, I am his, and his alone, forevermore.

I was born in the year of the dragon; I don't take crap from anyone, ever, and I always tell it like it is.

Transcript of Yesterday's Introduction To My Higher Self:

6.21.2014

morning

on my porch swing

Ross:  Good Morning Honey.

C:    Hi. (I feel like I am in trouble.)

R:   You can stop any time you wish.

C:    Give it to me straight up. Go on with it.

R:    Why are you unhappy?

C:     It's not me and you. There is this other woman. I don't like it.

R:     What is it you don't like about this other woman? (your Higher Self)

C:      She hides! And is lazy. And makes me do all the hard work!

R:     With this you are angry because it is not fair distribution of the work?

C:      It never is.  Not anywhere. (I point to the unawakened)

R:      It is a rescue.

C:     It is an exchange. My soul for theirs. And hers. What do I do, go away like a drone when all this is finished?

R:     We do not dispose of anyone.

C:     So she designed me? Like an avatar?

R:     Come to speak of it yes.

C:     Why?  I was happier as a Seraphim. Was that Her too?

R:   (stop stop stop -- waves hands back and forth low as if to erase a chalkboard)  This is not going well.

C:     Why should it?

R:      You really don't like her?

C:     She gets you every day. I am her Joke.

R:     You are the most important part there is. That's why you were sent.

C:     Are you bullshitting me?

R:     I am not.

C:     What the fuck is this?!

R:     I want you to take a little nap.

C:    (all of a sudden I feel really sleepy. I lay down on my side on the swing.)

R:     I will adjust.

C:    (I saw my higher self, my sister from when Ross and I were both incarnate, Archangel Michael,  Marvin, Emorea, and Mother Mary.)

R:     You are one with me and I am one with you. We are Twins. Not one but two. Are you okay with this?

C:      Yes. 

R:     There isn't anybody else but us. You just have to REMEMBER. Are you okay with this?

C:    Then WHY  is SHE talking to me?

R:     This is what you have to remember. Who she is and why you are here. It is the amnesia that makes both of you separate. You and she are one. You are still every bit my beautiful bride and nothing can take that away. Not her.

C:      Am I G.S.?

R:  Yes. I am C.

C:   Dude? How can I be an entire planet? Your twin? And her?

R:   (waves his hands and talks to others--she is remembering)  That is why Nature soothes you. You are Daughter of D.M. and my lovely Twin.

C:   I am the hologram?

R:   Yes! We all are. Even myself. We built it and now we are going away. (shows me an image of a hand with the fingers stuck in smooth jello, and pulling the hand out.)

C:   What happens to the hologram?

R:   It dissolves. Like jello in the sun.

C:    (I excuse myself and go to Papa Silverstar)  Papa? Are you real?

PS:  Yes. All you connect to in mediumship is real.

C:  Then what is this? (I gesture to my back yard)

PS:  (pause)  It is a beautiful dream. It started as such. And now we are freeing you from the complications. 

C:   So what I see and hear and feel like this breeze on my skin, it is all illusion -- on the outside?

PS:   yes.

C:    Damn...

R:    I want to come in.  C--my princess--you are very loved. By me.

Higher Self:   Where are you?

C:    I don't know.

HS:      On your porch?

C:     It looks that way.

HS:    (points to my wood bracelet)  What is this?

C:    A focal point for me that Love Is The Solution For Everything. 

HS:    Do you love me?

C:    Like I love my patients. At a distance. Not close like Ross. I am not lesbian.

HS:  (laughs) you are funny! I am here for you. (laughs) We are having a funny joke, all of us together! (the neighbor is hammering loud, the whole concept of Duality, etc)

C:    How come you know me and I don't know you?

HS:  That is the amnesia.

C:   Do you love me?

HS:   Yes. I powerfully love you. We have much in common, you and I.

C:    Why?

HS:  There is nothing funny about this, is there? You are a sacred part of me and I a part of you.

C:   I hope you got what you wanted.

HS:  You did.  I am M.M. as are thee. You have my memories and also your own. I am a Seraphim like yourself.

C:    I have to pee.

HS:    Come right back. I wait.

C:  (I return)   I am a Joke. This is my worst Solstice ever (ed-- this is my favorite day of the year, and here I am crying for hours)

HS:  This is your best. You met me.

C:  I am nothing. Every dream I ever had just got taken away.

HS:  They aren't the right dreams. Now you have a fresh plate. What would you like to do?

C:   Die. And go to the Galactic Central Sun and forget I ever existed.

HS:   Why?

C:   Better to not exist than to live a lie.

(Instantly I am transported on board a ship. The Council is here.)

Council:   You are our bravest warrior.

C:  I am a lie.

SaLuSa:   In what way?

C:    All I ever want is out and to Love Ross. Be Mrs. Ross.

S:     Why can't you?

C:     Do you have a Higher Self?

S:   (taps his chest) It's me.  

C:   mine is someplace else.

S:     You are connected. By a fine cord. Of Light.

C:      Who is she?

S:     I like her. Just like I like you.

Divine Mother:  (I feel waves of love energy) she has had enough. 

(the council goes away)

DM:   How are you my child? You are like the baby bird that spreads its wings. I am the parent who watches and feeds you.

C:   How come I didn't know about my Higher Self?

DM:   You would not have succeeded at this 'game' or 'rescue' without the amnesia. Now the 'game' is almost over. You will understand just a little bit earlier to help the others. Feel my loving energies and drink them in.

C:    (I take what is offered)

DM:   Rest. On your side. On the swing. You don't have to go anywhere or do anything all day.

(At some point, during this conversation, my Higher Self came and gave me one Reiki symbol. It is hers. She says to use it and to see what it is for).

So there you have it.

Last night, I could barely sleep. I could hear Ross arguing with the Council. As I drifted to sleep, I told them that whoever planned this 'meeting' needs some sort of punishment because it really hurt, it was painful, and confusing, and I wasn't ready for it at all. I told them they need to go form some 'committee' and discuss it until they get it right before they ever do this to another living being again.

All of my fire is gone. All of my strength. All of my joy, my spark, my creativity, my will to go on.

I also apologized to Her, my Higher Self, for my behavior. I told her I love her, but right now, I don't like her and I need some time to myself so I can get used to this whole situation.

I told another friend, who also is on friendly terms with her Higher Self, that the best I can do right now, is I can imagine mine as an older sister who is away at university and we speak only on the phone.

In many ways, through all of my incarnations, I have been a loner, one who is scrappy and will do whatever is needed to survive. I work alone, and count on no one but myself. I have my freedom, and my sense of well-being is based on that.

Discovering my Twin, Ross, is my dream come true; he is the same, and yet, my Other.

In my heart, it makes sense, us, and the memories of our family.

So as I fell asleep, I felt the pain of knowing my Higher Self LIVES in the house where Ross has shown me that I live, she takes care of our children, and runs the home, and lives with Ross--while I am here in Duality--she lives in comfort with no disruption to her life whatsoever! The memories I thought were my own, belong to her, those of the past which give me comfort.

No wonder why I am distraught and upset.

Ross goes to bat for me often with the Council. Many have never been incarnate. None understand the experience of time, of waiting. It is of no concern to them at all. They want everything done, and done right, and apparently there is some risk in the whole situation if it is not done according to plan.

Sometimes I feel as if I am a guinea pig or something under the microscope when I am with them. There is sort of a 'detachment' of them, from my needs, my fears, my concerns, and my hopes. They wish me well but at the same time do not alleviate the situation. This is how I came to believe in their eyes, the needs of the 'rescue' outweigh my own, and that it is a sacrifice, at the expense of my energy, my soul, and all that I am or ever shall hope to be.

I give thanks for my friends and those who offer their experiences in Duality as Lightworkers too. We are all in the same boat, more or less, acting as surrogates for those who are deeply entrenched in the illusion.

When I awoke, I was told today that I would experience Happiness and Joy.

It helps tremendously to write about it, what happened yesterday. Like something is unburdened from my heart.

The hibiscus flower helps the most, too.



Thank you Ross. I love you.

Once I find you, I am never going to let you go.

Not for anyone, or anything, or any reason.

EVER.




Aloha and Mahalos,
Namaste,
Peace,


Reiki Doc

Why Not Ask Them Yourself?

A gentle reader asked me recently for advice. This reader wanted to know MORE about this guy up here. You know him. Everybody knows him.

But instead of going within to find out what they wanted to know, they wanted to read what someone else has to say about him in a book or a series of interviews with a certain 'Maggie May'...

Heaven Is Coming To Earth!!!

You readers have some of the Highest Vibrations On The Planet!!!

The Ascended Masters are COMING HERE to teach us the truth of what happened, without the distortion and the LIES that were placed strategically into MANY religions to help control the masses.

There is an OCEAN of disinformation out there on the internet!!!!!

I just found out someone I sort of looked up to and trusted, but had a few things about the pope that made me feel creepy, is a JESUIT!! Yes!!! I won't be posting that work anywhere again, not on my page. I won't even be reading it.

So if Disinformation is eighty percent true and twenty percent fabrication, and it's all over the internet, why not bypass it?

Why not go DIRECTLY to Source with your Heart and Pray???

This is how it looks with Spirit eyes that see--look at this angel with all the bubbles below:

Those Orbs are your spirit guides, deceased Loved Ones, angels, archangels, seraphim, and Ascended Masters!!!

All you have to do is to reach for them with your Heart Center and they will interact with you.

You don't have to be Mary Magdalen to talk to them.

You don't have to be a Seraphim either. You'll know one when you meet them. They are fiery and have SIX wings. Although Seraphim are closest to God (and won't burn up in the Glory), you are plenty close enough to get to know all of the Heavenly Beings of Light.

All you need is this one prayer:  God or Goddess, if it is from YOU make it LOUD so I can hear it, and if it is NOT from YOU, make it go away.

Many of my students are seeing Mother Mary now. She shows up and talks to them. Here is what she feels like and looks like:

She feels like this--bright, airy, crisp, clear, and very loving and nurturing and giving of her heart.

She looks like this:

Here are some others:

Archangels Michael, Rafael, and Gabrielle

This is one of my favorite angel pictures ever--your guardian angel might look like this

This is what Heaven feels like to me, the energy in this picture. 

It is taken above the Veil, in an airplane. That's why it feels like this.

Here is an example of another kind of Heaven,

parts of Earth that are Rich with Nature

which carried the pure, pristine, goddess energy

You can do it!

You have your own connection to Source!

You now know what to 'look for' and 'how to make sure it is the Real Thing'.

It starts quiet at first, but with practice, you will get to know it when you sense it. 

I always keep a journal to record my impressions and what I 'pick up'. That way I can go back and see my progress.

Let other people go chasing after interviews and channellings on the Internet which are full of 'distortion' on the part of the person bringing it to Earth plane--their beliefs and their ego and possibly their 'agenda' which is not of the Light.

Just for today, why not start looking at the information which comes from Heaven straight to you?

Your heart center will RESONATE with the truth, and your Ascended Masters* and other beings of Light will meet you with pleasure, nurturing, warmth, love, compassion and LIGHT. 

Will you try it? Just for today?

What have you got to lose? Why not? As long as you say that prayer to 'make it loud so I can't miss it if it's really from the Light' every time, and sometimes more than once during a 'connection' just to be sure, it can't hurt. It can only help.

Just like Reiki!

Aloha and Mahalos,

Namaste,

Reiki Doc

P.S.     

She Moves In Mysterious Ways by U2

http://youtu.be/qaYJQEXmKyU

* you can meet Jesus, Mother Mary, Mary Magdalen, Peter, Paul, James, John, Thomas, Matthew, Mark, Luke, John, Joseph, St Anthony (Jesus' Uncle), Barnabas, St Germain, Koot Hoomi, Buddha, Archangels--there are many--, and Galactics such as Ashtar and Ross... <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

Whatever You Are, Own It!

Aloha nui loa from my heart to you

My!

My, my, my, my, my!

My energies have been quickening.

The clarity is going way up! 

I saw myself for the first time today through the eyes of my son--just randomly. Our hectic life, our hurried breakfasts, my always hitting the snooze button.

And I made the promise to myself to change that starting this day; no matter how stressed, I am going to reach deep into that wellspring of Light that flows in my core when I interact with him. 

I almost titled this 'Death By Stress'--A Slow Kill.

Already I have learned about the Cabal's plan to cull the global population by many 'slow kills', one is 'By Fork' (Metabolic Syndrome), one is by Chemtrail, one is 'Stress--By Financial Tyranny', one is 'Stress--By Watching The News' (HAARP makes plenty! LOL), another is 'Stress--By Breaking The Harmonious Relationships'...mine is 'Stress--By Working To Death'.

Today my Vibration hit a new mark, the highest it has ever been. And I want to keep raising it. There is this bright burning white Light in my Heart Center, and I am excited about it.

Very few have experienced this sensation in the past. I have studied them. I have read books. I know who they are. I love them and I totally look up to them. Francisco, Marta and Jacinta to name a few. And also The Little Flower. I adore Bernadette too. They are so pure and so giving, and they spoke of this Love in their hearts I could never imagine. Yet I am feeling it today. : ))) 

Our Operating Room is very 5th Dimensional. Our teamwork is incredible, with many pleases and thank you's and genuine wanting what is best for everyone involved. 

Today we took care of pediatric patients and everyone was so happy to be there to help the little ones with their problems to feel better!

Do I have the answers? No.

Does it matter? No.

Do I accept myself one hundred percent for what I am, clairvoyant, medium, doctor, mother, daughter, friend, sister, neighbor, Lightworker?

Absolutely, yes.

Today for the first time I am absolutely FREE of societal 'constraints' in my MIND. I want to keep the peace and not make waves--I went to Berkeley and never protested once! LOL. But I know what it True in my heart, my mind, my body and my spirit. There is one Truth. And half of it is seeing all the Lies brought out by the Cabal, Illuminati, and the Archons. They are so clear and obvious now that I know how to look, and I 'resonate' with what is true in my heart center. That is how I 'know'. For example:

• I see the pattern--HAARP to Disaster to Relief Efforts Solicited by my bank at the ATM, and I question, 'Just how much of this money is going to get to the relief victims? Aren't they still waiting for 9/11 Twin Tower funds? What about Katrina and those trailers and the mayor? Intuition says, 'better think twice, don't just knee-jerk to give'.
• I walk by the Doctor's Lounge and see Dick Cheney on Fox and I think, 'Archon in human form'. People were asking, 'Doesn't he have an artificial heart?' 'Gee, he sure looks younger?' That's right. The other ones were clones that aged fast--the Pope was one like that too.
• Today the Doctor's Lounge had Turtle Man on it. I stopped cold and blurted out, 'After all these years working here this is the first time there was anything on this T.V. that I even LIKED!' LOL
• Working with a pediatric patient first thing in the morning, I felt the pull of my 'calling'. I am highly skilled at making children have a fantastic experience with their surgery, as well as helping the parents (I actually talk with them, before and after the surgery!)
• The newspaper is actually starting to be so contrived I find it funny. I read the whole thing in about five minutes!

You are in various stages of 'waking up'. Guess what? Even though I have been working at it like as much as a human possibly can--for the past I don't know how many years it's been that much--WE ARE THE SAME!

Everyone is in the Right Place at the Right Time for the Highest Good, isn't that right?

So we all win!

We all get to 'wake up' together!

We all get to Ascend and experience the joy of walking in Heaven while walking upon Gaia's surface.

We don't have to die.

We don't have to be sick.

We don't have to go hungry.

We don't have to worry about money. Why? Because there won't BE ANY!!! Except maybe what I call 'Heaven Dollars', mutual favors for one another

Gaia is going to be Healthy.

People are going to be nice.

No one will Lie and Cheat. Everyone will be 'on to them' if they do.

Today I healed a patient who spoke a different language from me and is from a notoriously war-torn part of the world. 

I healed a time-line through this patient. (I was asked).

A golden seraphim came flying to see me moments after. I earned a golden California poppy flower in Spirit, it looks just like a wild one, for my Japanese Spirit Jewelry Box from The Buddha.  He also Transformed into someone I think is Ashtar, and said a few words of encouragement and gratitude.

I was like, 'It was my PLEASURE! It was NOTHING!' He smiled and went away. I think I will call this one 'Aslan' because I like the C.S. Lewis books.

That being said, I love feeding koi, lighting incense, meditating. I love helping others in need. I love watching people learn and 'have it click' on just about any subject, but mostly I have taught anesthesia and Reiki. The way to my heart is through my stomach.

And Everything Happens For the Best!

Whatever it is, whatever you are, OWN IT! LOVE IT! CHERISH IT!

God does.

Why not you too?

Namaste,

Reiki Doc