Something changed yesterday. I felt it. It was a kind of breakthrough in the energies. It has remained ever since. For this I am most grateful.
My view of the Wentworth Falls waterfall from below Entire elevation 867 metres 2,844 ft The total height of the waterfall is 187 metres and the water comes from the Kedumba Creek,
Yesterday I began to write the blog post and I couldn't. I just gave up and went to breakfast with Anthony. In the morning the energies were still thick and dense.
Last weekend I flew with him to New York City for a conference. Just like with my mother, where my intuition told me long time ago that my up-until-then perpetually healthy mother would be the sickest of all in the family, serious, doctor-qualifying 'sick'...and she ended up with a 'flu' that turned out to be kidney failure from Goodpasture syndrome...I recognized shortly before the flight that Anthony had that kind of energy signature on him. Serious health problems that would ruin the vacation. I spoke to him from my soul of this warning. I saw fear in his eyes. Fear and dissimilation (hiding the truth).
A week before, on Sunday, after playing video games in a chair that doesn't support his back, Anthony sat up with serious back pain. He lay on the floor and asked me to crack his back for him. I did, gently, gingerly. Apparently his father Jared has been cracking his back like a chiropractor without a license. Yet another thing to make me sad.
Anthony was normal on Monday, but then after throwing some dodge balls had acute onset of severe back pain so he couldn't stand up. I had to pick him up from school early. I did ice, heat, massage, ibuprofen. He couldn't even stand up straight.
Well, then on Tuesday he went to school. But on Thursday I was called by him in tears. Everyone was against him and humiliated him--the teachers. It turns out there was a big misunderstanding. The teacher tried to explain to me that he wasn't in trouble. I smiled, acted oblivious to the situation although I knew full well, and said I was picking him up for an orthodontist appointment.
Friday night he confided in me that he had frequency, urgency, and dysuria but no hematuria. A UTI! Very rare in males. And the back pain had been at the costophrenic angle (over the left kidney).
Our first morning in NYC, I took him to urgent care, missing important sessions of the conference.
We got an antibiotic. The burning improved. But the pain was terrible. It kept getting worse and worse. At 7/10 I decided to skip the rest of the conference and take him to the ER at Presbyterian-Cornell. It was a sixteen dollar cab ride, with all the bumps causing him anguish along the way.
Even though Anthony is taller than I am, and adult size, he still needed pediatric emergency care due to his being under eighteen years old. We sat in the waiting room forever. The doctors coming out to screen us and the other patients in the waiting room. After two hours of screaming kids, and completely oblivious girls playing a wall screen video game practically on my lap, we were let in to the actual emergency room.
I was prepared to spend the rest of the trip at the hospital. I raised my concerns about kidney stone workup in children--were they able to do it? And like at the ER after his car accident three weeks ago, there was hesitancy to put him through a CT scan due to the radiation exposure. So, he got another ultrasound, only this only of the kidneys instead of the abdomen like before.
I saw it. I can read those things. A small hyper echoic mass the size of a small marble. The rest of the kidney looked okay but they took lots of doppler images to show the blood vessels.
Anthony has a tumor of the left kidney, an angiomyolipoma. It's supposedly benign. He will need an MRI back home.
I'm fortunate because my mom friend and urologist Regina was available by text for support.
With toradol i.v. he finally got the first relief from his back pain in days. (Back home, we only got ibuprofen and acetaminophen, which even in combination didn't touch it.)
And although I dreaded it, I told Jared what happened, and he who makes fun of my taking our son to the E.R. didn't argue it with me, and said kind things to Anthony on the phone.
As an anesthesiologist, untreated pain is extremely frustrating. I know there are more choices and with the opioid crisis (the mainstream media tells you this. In my conference it's all how to do anesthesia without it--that's not possible. You just add lots of other things so you use less.) it is really sad he had to suffer.
The whole time too, I felt the extremely dense energies. There is another conference that goes on here at the same time as mine. I felt all of the low energies, in the crowds, here at the hotels and out and about.
I felt powerless. I felt trapped in a hotel room.
I know the dark ones had me contained through my son.
I accepted it, and waited to leave when our flight is due home.
I also have been talking lots to my guides, as this lesson was extremely painful. That double-bind between work and family, I know is through Ross. And I said, 'I get it, I get it! You want me to have compassion for you back in our days together, I know. I don't know why you keep sending me this lesson.'
For days, my only prayer was, 'I'm sorry for my sins. I'm deeply sorry for anything I ever might have done to offend You.' and I just wanted to go Home. Home home. Up. I couldn't take it any more.
I couldn't hear my guides. I knew I was losing lots of money. I knew I should have listened to my boss and not bothered to come. (The information I gained from the sessions I went to was priceless, though).
I just had the feeling that the dark forces didn't want to give up their town, that they made their presence known, I was on their turf, and they had as close to a win with their people here--the crowds--being as near godless as can be on a vibrational level--buying into the status quo hook-line-and sinker. Not just the locals. The tourists too.
It made me sad. There was no light in anyone's eyes. People were going through the motions of being incarnate, learning their lessons I suppose, but not sparkling with joy of the heart and mind working together. It's a 'mind only' type of thing around here. And 'mind only' people are sadly, easily misled.
I have shell-shock from all I have seen and done in the service of Creator of All That Is. For the attachments I've removed. For my paying to go for some conference or thing but only to be put into service at the last second to face the unthinkable and dismantle it for spirit.
I know on the way to the hospital we passed the U.N. Ross said our presence was enough, not to 'do anything'. Same with the hospital, which happens to be next to Rockefeller University on 66th street. Being close was enough for Ross and his teams to do their work.
There was a man who looked in pain/mentally distressed at a vending machine while I was buying food and drink for us. His money wouldn't work in the machine. I bought him a ginger ale. I showed kindness to someone in need and didn't ask for anything in return. Perhaps that was enough?
The loudest Ross came through, he told me to 'have fun'.
I didn't know how to do it.
By the way, I adore snorkeling, and I adore Puhi, the moray eel. He's not easy to see. He likes to hide.
For some reason, yesterday, Anthony didn't want to take any medicines, and he was in a mood to ride the subway and see Little Italy.
We found the old St. Patricks Church and took a catacomb tour (it's more of a mausoleum tour)...we ate lunch at the oldest pizzeria in North America. It was Lombardi's and built in 1905. (Cash only! LOL).
Then he found his Stance shop, he loves those socks.
I saw Sabon, a store that was next to where I took a ballet lesson with the Joffrey ballet when I was here before I was a mom. I wanted to look. Their foot cream is good. They changed the jar for it. At that point Anthony had the intense pains again. It was okay if he kept walking, but bad if he was still.
We found our way back home.
We both had fun.
Was the energy in me that changed?
I don't think so.
I know with great anxiety and distress I've been reading the latest messages from The Council. We are heading down a ski jump and soon to have lift but some have already made the jump (me). Don't watch T.V. (kindergarten advice, needs to be repeated and nobody listens. I realized here the Broadway plays are all reinforcements of the stories told to keep us in line with cartoons and movies.) There was something on judging and not judging. My heart sank because if THIS is the quality of the message, than I'm a total fish out of water with the 'status quo'--and if I'm counting on the 'status quo' people to 'wake up' so I can go home, I'm just done with all of it. The whole Ascension, the whole writing to help people, the whole energy healing, the whole everything. It's been years. I'm exhausted from breaking the trail for the world.
The world changed here.
It helped a lot that the Heisman people and the New York Anesthesia people left. Super better energy.
I think when I accepted defeat with the darkness then the energy both in myself and others started to spiral up. It's better here. And perhaps some planet popped into place yesterday. I don't know it but I can feel it.
And Anthony stopped being tortured by whatever was torturing him too.
Water fed by the Jamison Creek flows over the cliff edge at Wentworth Falls for a drop of around 187 metres to the bottom of the valley
This is for yesterday's countdown.
It's interesting because a Reiki symbol was shown to me, a new one, and at the church I saw something unusual that was also in that same shape.
The coincidence made me smile.
Toyama, Japan - Oct 4, 2017. People visit Kurobe Dam in Toyama, Japan. At 186 metres in height, it is the tallest dam in Japan.
And this is for today's.Keep up on your climb.
I'm sorry I couldn't write. I had to deal with my family, both in spirit and incarnate.
If you are NY-based, I'm sorry, due to the struggles this isn't exactly a good time for me socially. Perhaps when things are better I can make us available.
Hang in there as best as you can. Hold your lessons dear. And manage upwards when the lessons get too tough.
I don't see what the future holds. I know Ross told me to just 'make it to NY' and he had been humming and acting like he wasn't planning anything even though I knew he was before this trip.
If anything does happen you will be the first to know. I tell everything, sooner or later. Secrets aren't good.
clap! clap!
Ross has been busy with his things on his end and he says they are going rather well.
Aloha and Mahalos,
Namaste,
Peace,
Ross and Carla
The Couple
