Here is the Schumann Resonance Frequency for today click here. It's off the charts.
Coincidentally, Ross had me try a new meditation. I had to just be empty with no thoughts and be still. That was long ago how I started to meditate. Over the years, it's more like a conversation, and I see and hear and feel 'over there' like I do here.
Because of the incoming energies, and also, perhaps, a little bit of my life situation, Ross had me switch back to 'empty, empty, empty' mode.
And it's a good thing.
Some of my concerns are 'why aren't I working?' and 'what's going to happen?' (I use the new Reiki symbol for that one) and 'what is ahead for me?'
I tell you, some really deep 'stuff' is coming out.
As a child I had to wake up early and go to the baby sitter because my mom was supporting the family. She had to work.
I hated it.
I actually resented my sister a lot because mom chose to stay home once she was born, and she got to wake up when she wanted, not like me.
It's hard to describe this unconscious anger and resentment from when you are pre-verbal and you KNOW something is wrong but there isn't anything you can do about it because you're just a baby.
I had no idea just how much anger I've carried for so long over this, just under the radar. I know God prepared me for college and residency and being an attending, and also for the lack of sleep. I was able to get by on five hours sleep a night for many, many years.
It helped me too because Anthony never had a 'nap time' that was consistent on the clock. It was 'more or less' and 'close enough'. If there was a family gathering around his nap time, oh well, we skipped it.
I was also as kind as I could be for poor Anthony getting up super early to go to pre-school, but fortunately, mom was able to stay with us from birth until age two on mornings when I worked. He didn't have to leave his bed either, at least then.
I remember whispering into his ear, when he was so sleepy and I was afraid I couldn't wake him up, 'would you like donuts?'. In a flash he would awaken with a smile and say, 'YEAH!'. Some mornings it was chocolate, others it was his favorite takeout place. But most mornings we had breakfast together at home, and I dropped him off at school. This is our only consistent memory from my crazy work life, and actually, some of his happiest memories are eating del taco breakfast in the car on the way to school.
We can break the cycle as best as we can, and make life easier for others in ways we have had pain. But no matter how kind-hearted we are, and how functional, the pain will make its way known until we recognize it and release it.
Ross is having a 'trust me' kind of guidance lately. And I trust. I realize a lot of joy has been taken from me, just through living life. And my cup is very empty. Even though I'm ending up with a longer vacation than my peers this summer, just through the fluke of 'being available on the call schedule' and 'there not being enough work', I have to admit that I NEED it.
Anthony NEEDS it. Today he has work. Tomorrow he has school registration and then work. he's making his way into the world, but he still needs me to drive him around and pack his lunch. Once he has his driver's license, it's another story. I get to enjoy being his Uber driver for a few more weeks...then I can breathe a huge sigh of relief, because it's been a long haul getting him to this point, while working.
Yesterday Ross sent me to the craft store. I've been learning things in my classes. There are things I can make for others to help them in a spiritual way. It was delightful to go and prepare for something new. I've been learning a lot about healing.
In places where there is traditional folk medicine, the people shun conventional allopathic medical treatment.
The more I study, the more I learn that this is a healthy thing.
My mom confided to me, that back in the old country, everyone knew what the priests did with the nuns, and what happened to the products of conception. Nobody said anything. Everyone still had to go to church like all day Sunday and all this other times too because it was a small village in Sicily and church ruled everything in everyday life. But mom, and my uncle, both hated it. Her parents didn't like it either.
She told me that when she was little her dad told her that the world was run by a very small council of like eight or twelve people who decide what wars happen and when.
People like this would be well aware that before certain multi-national corporations and corporate backers financed the medical schools in alignment with big pharma, everyone went to traditional folk medicine. They just wouldn't say anything.
When mom was little, and kids would get a cut or a scrape and were bleeding, there were no such things as bandaids. The moms would get some cobweb and put it in the wound.
As a child who was in charge of the family first aid kit, I thought it was so primitive! Spider silk into a wound? How clean is that?
Well, actually, spider web, I can tell you as a board-certified MD, is a potent activator of thrombus (clot).
That little village in Italy was way ahead of its time! Yes, spiderweb isn't sterile. I don't suggest it to you now, especially if you have diabetes or immune compromise. But for little kids exposed to everything back then when mom was growing up in WW2? Sure! It makes lots of sense.
I need time to be free. I need time in the garden, it has such a pull on me. There was such joy Anthony and I shared over our first lilikoi (passion fruit) that was ripe. I cut it into two halves and we scooped out the fruity seeds. It was a triumph.
I need time to organize my house.
I need time to 'stop and look around' like Ferris Bueller says. 'Life goes by pretty fast'.
We watched the movie last night.
I see something new every time I watch it. This time, it's that the people want to have fun, like in the parade scene, and that this fun is contagious! This one is going to be really, really hard for the dark ones to override. I know social engineering has been actively getting people polarized and political. But underneath that layer, people are good.
A friend of mine is Jewish, by conversion, and he has studied the Holocaust. He says times now are a lot like leading up to it then--rights are being taken away here and there, slowly, and the people don't notice. It's the same thing happening all over again...and he's concerned.
I shared with him the teachings of Mr. Hague. These times are written. There's the AC calling the shots. But at some point, the Jewish people are going to awaken and take leadership even though it's the AC, and save a lot of souls. They will figure out what's up, and spread the alarm, correctly. He took great comfort in that.
That's enough for today. It's time to figure out what to make for breakfast. : )))
Ross is happy, I can feel him, he seems extra glad for todays message we are sharing. Even though it feels like just a chat as I write, I can tell he's very pleased with the message we have created for you.
clap! clap!
Aloha and Mahalos,
Namaste,
Peace,
Ross and Carla
The beautiful couple
