We are at countdown day one hundred twenty-seven, and we wish to remind you how magnificent you are, how resilient, and how enduring your strength and ability to overcome.
There are times when it feels life gives you nothing but lead balloons--heaviness and doubt and fear.
Ross recently gave me some advice when I needed to go to the loan office and it was super stressful. He said, 'just play'.
It's true.
We are here for learning, we are here to take risks, and we are here to fail on occasion. You never learned to walk without having a few good spills and taking a few bumps, did you?
So...for the moment...let's disengage from the outside burdens and responsibilities...and focus on what counts.
This is the Basilica of Orleans. In France. This is where Joan of Arc was from. She was a peasant girl of much faith. She went to battle under the disguise of a boy, and eventually led armies in support of the Dauphin, the true king. She led an amazing life and touched many hearts. Eventually she was burned at the stake as a heretic.
When you are dealing with your fears, sometimes you might need to tap into your inner Joan of Arc.
You just face it head on, whatever is coming, unpleasant as it may be...and you let go of the outcome and do your very best.
I do that one a lot in the operating room. There are some patients who are so sick the prospect of giving them anesthesia frightens me to my core. They are so sick, there's no other choice, there is no way to delay or to optimize the situation.
In those cases I invite Archangel Raphael, and Ross to assist me. I also prepare the room with backup equipment for contingencies, and if it's really bad, I invite another anesthesiologist to be present while the patient is going to sleep just in case things go bad...
Tapping in to your inner Joan of Arc isn't just in your head. It's in your heart, and also, you take action to prepare for whatever you must face.
Remember this.
I don't know about you, but, in my life there have been some things I have said, 'I could never _______ (fill in the blank)' and I meant it wholeheartedly.
What I don't understand is that the very things I have said like that, I ended up doing.
It's weird, huh?
Being a surgeon. (I trained for two years as a general surgeon before switching to anesthesia which matches my personality better).
Being a single mom.
I went from engineering to medical school where I thought I was going to be a pediatrician--and I fell in love with surgery. I wasn't squeamish at all. I used to tell people I would faint at the blood from an incision...but I never did and actually ended up making many an incision myself!
And from being so adamant that a child deserves an intact home and it's not fair to the child...I ended up falling in love, being abandoned by the father of my child in pregnancy, and ending up living the fate I had feared.
In a way, being abandoned for reals sure healed my abandonment issues--I was still alive and the world didn't end--but it also made me never want to open up to anyone and risk being hurt again.
What I didn't know, was that motherhood was incredible, it's the best thing I ever did with my life, and I'm eternally grateful for this.
What is the worst thing that can happen?
This is a good question to ask yourself when you are facing your fears. Many times the worst isn't as bad as you'd think, possibly a little inconvenient and embarrassing, but it's not the End.
Remember the big picture, and how you are so very loved and cherished by Creator of All That Is.
Remember you are eternal, you are pure Consciousness, and you are having a Human Experience.
Be love in everything you are.
Keep in mind we manifest things we have on our mind and give emotion to. So in a way, worry is praying for what you don't want. Focus on what you do want. And the Universe will provide it for you.
I wanted to be a doctor ever since I was very little, since I was four.
I had problems figuring out how to accomplish it though. Other kids had privilege. We were poor. And mom and dad were totally against it. I had to do engineering where I could find work after college and support myself.
I actually had advisors but was too shy to ask for a letter of recommendation the first time around.
So, fast forward three years, and I need neurosurgery. I am IN a hospital, UCSF Long-Moffit hospital, and I love the environment. I had been invited by two friends, separately, to go sit in on lectures with them when they went to Medical School. I declined because I might like it, and my world was comfortable as it was. Married. My health was my last invitation, and I couldn't say no.
I had to leave everything from the Bay Area behind. And the scariest part? Letting go of my health insurance from my old job, and going onto Student Health with my preexisting condition of the pituitary tumor/surgery/follow up because sometimes they grow back.
I did it anyway. And you know what? Our insurance there was actually the best I ever had anywhere in my whole life!
Now in my life, I have other fears. Fear of overwork. Fear of overextending myself until my old house sells. Fear of never being able to retire. It's easy to let myself get sucked into it.
The reality is that this house is old, and needs lots of repairs and TLC, and I'm just not in a place in my life to do all of that. I'm tired of the association. And I could use a change. It doesn't have to be my 'forever home'. Just the next four years while Anthony is in high school is good. I moved at fourteen. It was a good skill to learn. Now he can learn it too.
I'm thankful I was here sixteen hears. Before this due to my career I moved because of my training. I just wanted to put down some roots. I have. I even raised my family.
What I realized last night, is that this home itself was bought not because I liked it, but because of fear. My ex wanted me out. I refused to double move--to an apartment then to a house--but the clock was ticking and I had to find something. This one was the biggest I could afford that wasn't too far from my last home. But it never had 'flow'. The feng shui wasn't right. And as Tim Braun said, 'I've outgrown the energy of it and it's not supporting me'.
I've been really watching a lot of Beat The Bush on YouTube. He's the frugal guy in the Bay Area.
He's right.
And it's a good wakeup call for me to establish my financial goals, and work for them. After delaying gratification for so long in my training, literally ten years--it was hard not to enjoy life. What my goal is now is peace of mind, serenity, as I am sensitive to my surroundings...and allowing my spiritual growth to take the next step. Even if it comes with challenges.
If you have an order from me, a paid one, thank you, and your orders are filled.
If you have free orders pending, those are next, and in the next week hopefully we will get all these orders filled.
Ross and I know the importance of getting our energetic support out there to our readers. That's why we offer them for free at times. Times are hard. People don't understand what benefit we have to offer, but they will. One says it is like an 'energy hug' to wear our jewelry or have our creations in the home.
We are extremely fortunate that some of our readers support our work--free bracelets aren't free, there are materials to use to make them, and packaging/shipping/postage too. For this we are most thankful to have others provide assistance so we can continue outreach to everyone who is interested in our energy work.
Once things settle down, there will be more emphasis on our creations and our healing services, and hopefully our website too.
Our app is in limbo, just like the website, because of the Apple ID, I need a website, and there's only so much time in a day. At work, caseloads are getting longer and we are working through the wee hours on a more routine basis.
What I saw, like a flash, is that after the house sells, and after we move, perhaps I can ask for work closer to home, on a per diem basis. This will allow me the time I need to move forward with Ross' and my work...
Depending on what June 17 brings! I've seen cloud ships. And also, sensed energy shifts for the better.
Be mindful of people who are of lower vibration getting upset with you. That's starting to happen now. Jared thinks I hate him and trick him (projection) and also people at work things I'm pulling fast ones on them (some more projection too) when I'm actually putting patient care first. I see the angry looks. The world energy field is shifting just enough so that the low vibe people are getting uncomfortable. They aren't able to get away with their old tricks. They are unhappy for that. Remember the importance of unconditional love and rest to refill your cup.
Be mindful of how your higher vibration is going to make some things not very fun any more too. I went to a basketball game as a guest of a friend. A college one. And the whole time I was like, 'bread and circus. This is total bread and circus!' The crowd enjoys being put through the bread and circus routine. And you see it, the control, the manipulation, and the willfully going along with it. It makes you pause and give thanks YOU are not caught up in it.
What do you think is going to happen when all the asleep awaken? And the bread and circus doesn't work any more? Hmmmm?
Yup. Total pandemonium.
So brace yourselves, be good to yourselves, be mindful of what's on your manifestation 'plate', and face your own fears with gentleness and honesty and no sense of shame or guilt. Just learn and move on...
Ross is happy with what I wrote.
And today we have plans to spend time with the family.
clap! clap!
Aloha and Mahalos,
Namaste,
Peace,
Ross and Carla
The Couple
