My Perfect Day

Today had a dreamlike quality to it. It was very good.

The first part was a case (I can't tell you what, exactly), but with a new very BIG piece of equipment (Think Domo Arigato Mr. _____-O), in the chest, with one of my old surgeons from my old work where I was a professor.

I heard this voice say 'good morning' to me as my bouffant hat stuck on my ponytail and covered my eyes. I looked up and it was him--I had been up many a night with him over ruptured thoracic aneurysms and even once told him to re-open the chest because my TEE showed there was a kink in the coronary bypass graft when he closed it. Although he was not my mentor, he was more like a brother and a friend through the many years we worked together.

It was wonderful to feel the affection and respect of the old team, and heart team we had been, all of us, from perfusion to scrub tech, all of us, worked together as one.

This patient was as perfect as could be--no teeth (more room for the double-lumen endotracheal tube), super easy i.v. insertion, and easy arterial line! I verified the tube placement with fiberoptic scope, taped it, and the case was on!

I was shocked to see in the room a strange man who looked an awful lot like the chief heart surgeon at our old work. Why would he come here? But it wasn't him.

As I sat, my Reiki 1 student RN came up to me. She is looking into RN First Assist--where she scrubs in and helps the surgeon. I thought COOL! More Reiki opportunity. But then here is the kicker--last week, a sick vascular patient came in. Both this RN and the scrub-tech-now-nursing-student were giving Reiki as the prep was being done. They gave a lot.

The surgeon opened and said out loud, 'I don't know HOW this patient could still be alive!'. 

The vascular problem had burst!

Everything went well and it was a huge save!

Back to my patient's case, at the end, the strange man came over and said, 'Excellent job on the anesthesia! The lung went down and it STAYED DOWN!' I demurred and said since the patient had no teeth it was easy. (In reality, I picked the right size tube, checked to make sure it was in position, and taped it really well). He does hearts in Dallas! I asked about the eating habits there, and he said 'It's job security' (everyone is heavy and full of heart disease). He can do robotic everything on the heart, valves, bypass, off-pump, you name it. It was really great to meet him. It was most UN-cardiac to be nice to anesthesia like that. Wow! I really appreciate it.

At lunch I saw the Egypt thing. I think this is the beginning of the end of the cabal. I was pretty excited. But when I saw a picture in the paper this morning of Obama and Dubya in some middle east place commemorating 'lives lost in a plane crash' anniversary, I saw some pretty strange body language. As you know, W is a full-on archon inside that body, with no scruples or heart whatsoever. (Both George senior and Barbara are products of Joseph Mengele's Monarch program). And they both had their hands clasped in a weird way down low over their bodies. W had no facial expression or body language consistent with the occasion--it could have been a kegger, you know? Anyhow, Obama looked at W, as if looking for a signal. Something was being 'said'. And with the media frenzy now over Egypt, it's time to meditate meditate meditate each morning over  Egypt like Cobra says until 'the fat lady sings'.

While I saw the T.V. in the Doctor's Lounge where my huge white vortex is working very nicely, thank you very much, the table of doctors present decided to slam alternative medicine. It started with a colonoscope patient asking about detoxing. An then the gay primary care doc said he was asked at a spa if he wanted to pay twenty dollars extra for seaweed extract for a massage. Apparently since seaweed 'absorbs pollution from the oceans it can absorb toxins from you.' No thanks, he said. Another spoke about the negative ion water, the liver 'flush' and kale. That's when I spoke up, put on my biggest grin and said, 'I LIKE kale!'

You see, their grief is over people getting information from just anybody on the internet. Now they DIRECT people to 'good websites':

• http://www.webmd.com
• http://www.mayoclinic.com/health-information/

So, alternative or not, now you are informed of some 'good sites' on the conventional front. 

I prefer to sit amongst them and just know that one day, my truth will come out, all truth will come out, and they will be amazed at how cool I was not trying to 'convince' them of anything except that I enjoy kale. (everyone but me had the nasty 'choose your own' pasta bar, too. I ate a salad.)

The next case was a patient with clear signs of overwhelming metastatic disease. I gave Reiki and the transition symbol.

Then I wanted to go home.

I went in through the recovery room. Someone was coding. I saw the code team there, and walked to my lock box cabinet to put all the anesthesia narcotics away.

As I was at the cabinet, I realized I should give reiki to the poor person that was coding. I did. The spirit of that person showed up, I explained to them and Blessed Mother how I was helping, and She said she would take care of the rest of it. She took his hand and they walked away.

I walked back to the bedside. Two of my Reiki students were there, taking it in. That is good. And my friend who was running the code was doing okay. My offer for help was declined. I also, oddly enough, saw the spirit clearly in the nurse who thinks they are a doctor in the cardiology department, the one who back-stabbed me quite viciously three years ago. There was NO connection to source. All efforts were through the mind, and they were confused that 'things weren't working'. I saw all of the life, from childhood to adult, in that person in one glance. I realized the back-stabbing wasn't me. (part of the first case helped soothe the pain from that stab, too. It has been festering for some time now). A scrub tech was saying it was time to call the code (stop resuscitating efforts). But as I walked out, plan was for ICU on drips.

On the way out the door to the parking lot, I ran into a colleague walking in. 

The coding patient had died. This one was coming in to help the anesthesiologist that had a bad day.

Mine, on the other hand, was excellent! A little Reiki here, a little educating the doctors there, a little thoracic wonderful and everything. It was a good day. <3

Namaste,

Reiki Doc

What I Do

I do what I adore!

It takes a lot out of me. I just got home after working all day since seven-thirty a.m. But I get to do my dream come true each and every day. I am so very blessed to have a chance to follow my passion and heal others with really cool people who enjoy healing others too.

Today, after I made breakfast, washed the Martial Arts clothes, packed for the weekend with dad, made lunches, and took care of the animals in addition to getting myself ready...I:

Attuned an MD who was changing lines of work while they were on my operating table getting surgery. I attuned this doc to Reiki 1. Clearly, they were taking positive steps in their life, as shown by the health improvements since eleven months ago at the last operation. Over MY entire body weight was lost! (Spirit guided me to do the attunement--the patient is unaware but is going to have some Big Positive Changes 'just start happening' in their life. )

I didn't knock the 'front teeth' out on a patient who had really bad dental work that was falling apart. Imagine the silver 'ring around the tooth' that was connected one tooth to the next but the next was broken inside the silver ring and wiggled while they talked. This patient had a BMI of 57**--and let me tell you, there was not much room in that mouth for me to work, and not much TIME to get the airway secured, but I did it without messing up the 'teeth'. And I documented it every step of the way--TEETH INTACT!

I gave someone who was crying in pre-op before surgery a 'Strawberry Margarita' in the i.v. to help block the fear. The spouse could not believe the sudden transformation to mellow once my drugs 'hit'. This scared one was H-A-P-P-Y!

I took care of someone who had cancer because their spouse was sucking the life out of them. I didn't say anything, but I 'just knew' on an energy level from interacting with both of them. I didn't talk about the cancer. I just played it cool and gave lots of anesthesia.

I dodged a bullet by having a slow wake up with the patient in the paragraph above--so someone ELSE had to stand by with the six-hundred pound patient who was getting a skin biopsy with no anesthesia. The surgeon wanted anesthesia there 'just in case'.

Someone asked me to help with a Code Blue in the O.R. I did. I also did 'mediumship' and
'Reiki' the whole time I was helping and present. I asked Our Lady to assist with the crossing over, if there was to be any for this patient today.

I prayed for someone barely one year older than me who had AIDS and no veins whatsoever on my table for a long case. I asked If nobody has prayed for him, please God, let at least the one who has prayed for him be me.  The Reiki worked very well. Instead of the drug-seeking behavior seen in Pre-Op Holding, by PACU there was twenty percent of my usual narcotic dose for narcotic-naive patients, and the guy was sleeping FINE! Can you imagine giving LESS narcotic than you would for a clean-living Korean grandmother, only twenty percent of that dose, in an IV drug user who is actively using and having it be OKAY? Cool, like, totally unbelievable, right?  Reiki is magnificent! It balances and heals without any side effects. 

Anyhow, tomorrow is a big day. Two nurses, one surgical technician who is also a nurse-to-be, my son's teacher, and a boyfriend who is into UFO's (of the tech) are taking Reiki 1 class with me.

I am taking Reiki into the O.R. where I work--and now others in Conventional Medicine are interested in it too!

Namaste,

Reiki Doc

** from WebMD:

What Is a Healthy BMI?

A person with a BMI of 18.5 to 24.9 is considered to be at a healthy weight. A person with a BMI of 25-29.9 is considered to be overweight. A BMI over 30 is considered obese. A BMI of 40 or above indicates that a person is morbidly obese. This can increases a person's risk of death from any cause by 50% to 150%.

^{Body Mass Index (BMI), Kg/M}2

Weight (pounds)	Height (feet, inches)
	5'0"	5'3"	5'6"	5'9"	6'0"	6'3"
140	27	25	23	21	19	18
150	29	27	24	22	20	19
160	31	28	26	24	22	20
170	33	30	28	25	23	21
180	35	32	29	27	25	23
190	37	34	31	28	26	24
200	39	36	32	30	27	25
210	41	37	34	31	29	26
220	43	39	36	33	30	28
230	45	41	37	34	31	29
240	47	43	39	36	33	30
250	49	44	40	37	34	31

Too Scared To Do Reiki: Code Sepsis

Yesterday was a short day at work. I was torn between seeing mom and heading home to 'catch up' on everything that had been 'falling behind' since she got ill before New Year's Day. That included sleep.

I spoke on the phone with my sister who lives close for an hour. At her request I called the doc on staff at the nursing home where mom had been admitted by her health care plan for post-surgical rehabilitation. It is not the best place*, but the only place insurance was willing to pay for it. There are times when as a doctor you have to take your knowledge of medicine, use it like a baseball bat, and aim it at a provider who is not doing 'enough' for your loved one.  I have a list of concerns about mother. Shall we go over them one by one? There are four... and I carefully clicked off each organ system and disease process that was dramatically (read: medically indefensible) out of whack. This doc 'saw the light' and disclosed that 'she needs a higher level of care'. No Duh. Even the urology attending could hear a lung process on her follow-up visit last week!

A large part of medicine, in practice, is the avoidance of things that if left unchecked could grow into greater problems. You 'head it off at the pass'.

This is where medical ignorance and 'burnout' are deadly. I once had a fellow intern who would not check labs because then there would be more work to do and more problems to fix. He got let go from the training program a couple of years later. Checking labs is how you get your patient better.

Mom was floridly septic upon arrival to the E.R. last night. They called a 'code sepsis'. She was hanging between life and death. I dropped everything, picked up the kids from school, ate a quick bean and cheese burrito with them, and drove an hour into thick traffic to say our goodbyes.

This is where I was too scared to to Reiki. I didn't want to know with my own mother how close to death she was; there is a characteristic slowing of the chakras until they stop completely. 

Instead I said, 'I accept whatever happens. I accept. I accept.'

The full-court press in the E.R. worked. On Levophed (norepinephrine), mom had a blood pressure that was compatible with life. But her WBC count was over fifty. I have never seen anybody make it with a count as high as this. Her internist said she has seen someone make it, but it took a long time to recover.
She also asked if mom was DNR. She knew from my sister that mom was full-code, full-care.

We surgeons called the Medical ICU 'The Death Star'. Unlike our surgical one, few made it out of the MICU alive. One of the reasons is the intensivists were so quick to make everybody DNR (do not resuscitate).

So I told her, specifically--Yes for chest compressions; Yes for chemical code; Yes for electrical code; Yes for intubation.

I was surprised at how confident she was that 'her chest x-ray is clear therefore her lungs are not the source'. Everyone who has had medical training knows that the clinical picture in a CXR can 'lag behind' the clinical presentation of the patient by two days. I pointed out that her breathing was labored and respiratory rate was high, she was gurgling with ineffective cough, and although her oxygen saturations were 100% she was going to tire soon. She would require intubation. We discussed tube sizes--the intensivists like a big one (8.0 or 7.5) to do pulmonary toilet, but the last time she had a tube emergently she couldn't talk right for six months after. So 'be careful' please?

We three sisters took turns with mom and the others with the kids. She was talking but weak.

When it came time to say goodbye, as the kids have school and I have work (docs can't 'call in'), I touched her arm and gave Reiki. I did what my Reiki teacher taught me to do, but with my mind/energy, not all the positions. Great peace reached both of us. I saw mom relax. I felt myself relaxing too. Her energy system was weak but not 'checking out' like I had feared. In our Reiki tradition, we give the Transition Symbol, to help make the crossing over to the Other Side easier. I gave this symbol to her. (I had also asked for prayer,healing, and Reiki on every list I know.)

Reiki is a wonderful gift at the end of life, especially when it is a close bond. It heals both the recipient and the giver.  If you haven't taken a Reiki Class, I would suggest it, if only for this one time for its use. It is worth it to take the training to have it available when your loved ones are very sick. Mom is being kept alive by chemicals right now. When the nurse giving break futzed with the Levophed pump because of 'air bubbles', I saw mom's BP drop from 120 systolic to 80 systolic. It took the regular RN coming back to 'fix it' with the pump. I pointed out mom's vitals, and said to him, 'she missed you' and he laughed. It takes a very alert and vigilant nurse and doctor, both, to keep a person this very sick, alive.

I thank you for all the Love and Reiki that you have sent. I can feel it, and it helps tremendously.

Namaste,

Reiki Doc

* SIX patients from the same insurance policy were 'bounced back' to the system hospital from the SNIF rehab center that same day. My sister overheard the ER nurse comment to another RN that 'the doctor there is making rounds again', implying that the medical care was suboptimal at this place.

Healing From Loss

This year Imbolc came to me. Imbolc is the symbolic end of winter. We acknowledge it with candles to light the darkness of the night.

It is also known as St Brigid's Day, and Groundhog Day, February 2.

Here is how Spirit worked with me to produce a deep healing, and increase in awareness, of something I had hidden in my heart.

I have a skill set in anesthesia that is unique. As a cardiac fellowship-trained anesthesiologist, I have the skills to help someone who is one their way to death, come back. This is more than inserting a breathing tube in someone who can't breathe and would die. That is bread and butter anesthesia skill. It is the Cardiac Anesthesiologist who is called to help when a colleague has someone trying to die in the O.R. and they want help with the Code Blue.

Yesterday I saw more blood, gore, and death than I care to admit. All I can say is that during the code I was helping in, I saw Our Lady in the corner of the room. She said that she would come back for this person later, but that this patient would survive the code long enough to make it out of the O.R. There is a big difference between a death in the O.R. and death in ICU, by the people who count those things.  And as the pupils grew fixed and dilated, and the v-fib grew coarse, I was inspired to suggest an amp on Sodium Bicarb. It worked! And patient went to ICU. I checked this morning on the computer. Our Lady was correct.

After my twenty-four hour in-house call at the hospital,  it was my turn to see Nana in the nursing home. She said, 'I am hungry' and there was a tray and a chair next to her. I tried to feed her, but it was not at all like feeding my baby seven years ago.  I couldn't navigate the teeth in the barely opened mouth. I managed juice. Everything is thickened, because she can't swallow right. Then the nurses and nurses aides' came. I asked for instruction on how to help her eat. I watched. I learned. I helped.

Nana asked for the wheelchair. I took her around the entire building. She delighted in the beautiful orchid displays by the front.

There was once a time when taking care of the sick was done in the home, and the dead were washed and dressed by women. I felt the Goddess, in all of the suffering that was being treated by the workers, both men and women, but mostly women, at the nursing home.

When I heard the husband of Nana's roommate, who is incommunicative, praying in Samoan, and saw him bow his head and hold her hand, I saw the fruit of a lifetime lived in Love.

In the meantime, I was texting and calling my sister to help decide placement for mother when she leaves the hospital. It is our request to have them be at the same facility, as there is a rehab section that would be nice for mom.

All of this didn't phase me. I just keep going and going. But when my sister said that Target had a clearance sale on the tall seven day Votive candles I had just run out of, I decided to go. I bought every one they had left. There were fifteen in all. A deal at eighty-three cents each. They had the scent in them, and go for over two dollars at the grocery store.

Sicilian Orange. A label on another candle, a soy one, caught my eye and also stabbed my heart. Nana is from Sicily. Her house had just been sold to pay for her long-term care. Lilac & Honeysuckle. Dad. His favorite scents. For years we tried to get a lilac tree to grow in Southern California. It never worked. Our winters were not cold enough. Instead we grew honeysuckle on both fences that surrounded the back yard. The fragrance of honeysuckle in June is one of my favorite memories from childhood. I would pinch the bottom of the blossom, pull back the stamen, and catch a drop of nectar on the tip. I enjoyed many of these. Gardenia  Lily . Fresh gardenias were always in a bowl in my home I grew up in. Memories flooded my mind of my life with my parents. Beach Paradise. The beach is a huge part of where I grew up. It is always within me. Wildflower Meadow. That is my safe place I go to in my mind, when I was seven and walking on fallen logs with a friend at Sequoia. Life was so exciting and beautiful and fresh then. Bali Sunrise. This one I have yet to understand, but was guided to buy it.  Sweet Spun Sugar. I bought a big one, pink, for Erzulie. We go back, and she has always looked out for me. She keeps me always at my best, and I appreciate that a great deal.

I hadn't realized how important it is to accept death, and loss, and suffering, with something to focus  upon; in my case, it is a series of candles I will enjoy in my home over the next weeks.  I can smile because it happened, and look forward because I took the time to acknowledge where I had been in life.

Keep your eyes open for similar help from Spirit on Healing from Loss in your life too.  Happy Imbolc. And Blessed Be.

Namaste,

Reiki Doc

Wake Up and Smell the Coffee (Disturbing film)

Wake up and smells the coffee?

Yesterday I was called out of some good waves by a friend to come see this. As I looked at the horror of a dead harbor seal washing ashore, I sent strong messages Up, asking for Guidance:

surely there has to be some message in this (animal totem**)?

what is it You are trying to say?

Please send it so I might understand?

It took a few seconds, that felt like forever. And then it hit, an emotion/information that I understood immediately:

(There is a feeling you get in medicine, when the patient is not doing well, and is warning you that it is about to Code--code blue. It is the sickest one can be sick before actually dying. A code blue is a situation between life-and-death that can go either way)

Gaia is in trouble. She needs help right away. This is going to take MORE than reusable bags at the grocery store (the bags felt Insignificant, a drop in the bucket).

I felt a need to get everybody together and roll up our sleeves and get to work.

The whole Disclosure thing-whenever and however that is meant to happen-is only a start. The real work is only to begin after Disclosure.

Please send Love and Light to Gaia at every opportunity

Please listen for resonance in your Heart of Hearts to how you can possibly help Her

Thank you.

Namaste,

Reiki Doc

**Hawaiian Monk Seal from The Hawaiian Oracle by Rima A Morrell, PhD:

Hulu:  Challenge = Remembrance, Way through = Rhythm, Gift = Immortality

Aia ke ola i Kahiki

Life is in the Kahiki   (Kahiki are ancient lands)

In My Patient's Eyes: On the Edge of Code Blue

Last night, or rather, early this morning, I was called to the Intensive Care Unit to intubate a patient. On the phone, the nurse asked me what drugs I wanted for intubation. (I have options). I asked about hyperkalemia, renal failure, stroke, paralysis, all things that would affect my choice of muscle relaxant. And then intuition kicked in: what about blood pressure? Is the patient hemodynamically stable?


Yes.


I come upstairs to see a patient halfway through the dying process. There was a chest tube, elevated intracranial pressure, obtundation, and unresponsiveness. The vitals technically were stable, stable in the I am fixin' to code on you way. There was no margin for error on the anesthesia in this case--too much and the patient would require chest compressions.

I did an awake look, and passed a tube with no anesthesia, to keep vital signs stable.

But was it in the right place? It may have been in the esophagus (not-so-good) or in the trachea (good). My ways of testing were not as reliable in this patient due to the unstable blood pressure and heart rate, color, and noise in the chest and abdomen with ventilation. I called for waveform end-tidal CO2 capnography, just like we do in the O.R.

As I was waiting, the patient looked me straight in the eye. And instantly I knew--it was in the wrong place. The CO2 detector confirmed it. This is never a problem if it is detected quickly, and corrected at once. Which is what happened.

Energetically, when I walked into the room, I picked up an energetic maelstrom. The energy of the patient was chaotic. And I got a fleeting impression of, 'I want to die!'. But it faded. The entire time I was searching, as I worked with my hands, my spirit was asking 'SOS! SOS!SOS!'.

The patient, in their state of distress, on a soul level, heard. And gave me the answer that I needed. A direct look in the eye, that said, 'help me! something is not right!'

No matter where you are, or how confused you get, know for sure help will arrive; all you have to do is ask for it.


Even to keep somebody from coding.

Namaste,

Reiki Doc