The Return Of The Goddess...

As you may already have read, I am a conduit of the Goddess Energies. Lady Isis, the partner of Cobra, initiated me. 24/7 I bring in the energy of nurturing, warmth, love and compassion to Gaia and her people. It is my role in the process of Ascension for the planet and Her People and all life that is upon Her.

Do I think about it?

No.

I just live, and follow my inner guidance.

Not long ago was the first day I noticed Her, the presence of the Goddess, and it was at my work...

Goddess Tale One:
A nurse who is a single mother has a son who is a teen. Tall and lanky, he plays volleyball for the school team, just like her. He is ACTIVE and is hungry all the time.

She was sharing how his coach only has an energy bar and a soda, and buys from the snack bar. One day, she felt so moved to make a lunch for him while she was packing one for her son for the game.

He appreciated it, and soon it became her 'thing' to make for him his lunch. (She is not attracted to men, but she knows he makes very little money, is dedicated to teaching the children, and is a good man.)

The other day she gave him a cup of cinnamon applesauce, just like her son, who eats one costco-size container of it a week and is his favorite food in the world!

The coach stopped her to thank her. He said, 'I haven't had applesauce since my mom used to pack my lunch.'

She is the Goddess energy of nurturing, warmth, healing and compassion to him, just like she is to her son. And you can feel that energy flowing off of her as she shares this story--she is radiant with happiness to be able to help and touch this life.


Goddess Tale Two:
The worker in the cafeteria was just about ready to close. She is proud of me, a lady who is a doctor, and a nice one at that. I see there are fresh tamales! I ask what is in them. She says, 'chicken' and I said, softly, 'ohhhhhh' and turned to the salad bar. She was surprised, and asked, 'what is it that you want in them?' and I confessed I do not eat meat. I changed last year. She laughed and said, 'No wonder why you don't eat anything! Everything here is meat! That is good doctor, good that you turn vegetarian. That is good.'
Again, I could feel the nurturing, warmth, love and compassion...


Goddess Tale Three:
The worker who rang up my food.
She lost a child to SIDS a couple of days after bringing them home from the hospital.
Although you can see and feel her grief--it's been five years--she smiles and shows up for work, and carries on...
Sometimes when the Goddess is wounded, she still is able to give of her nurturing, warmth, love and compassion.
I have utmost respect for this worker who has been through so much.




I smiled when I realized everyone has their lessons!

Everyone is doing the best they can despite the 'static' and 'noise' of what is going on down here on Gaia's surface that is far, far different from the realms they once called 'home'...

Masculine or feminine, straight or gay, rich or poor, young or old, every size, every shape, every color, every level of soul 'education' as well as 'school learning'...all are beautiful Light for everyone to see!

We are One Family, One Love, One Hardship Carried Together, One Light.

We are joined at the heart, all of us....

I saw Her in me recently too.

I inherited an epidural from last shift. They had to bolus a lot. More than they let on, the other anesthesiologist. I saw the anesthesia record. There were huge doses! When I was called in to mix for the next bolus, I knew what to do. It was less than half the others. And I haven't been called since.

I detected a potentially lethal lack of supplies in my anesthesia cart. In the parturient (mom to have a baby) the airway is smaller than normal. There were no small sized breathing tubes. Only ones that would be too big. We have a new tech. So I stocked them. I went to the OR supply, wrote a note to the tech to be careful to check this stock and why it's important, and carried the proper size tubes in my arms across the hospital all the way back to L&D.

At the last c-section I did, I gave Reiki, just like always. I like to give the transition symbol to ease the addition to the family for all parties involved... But this time was different. I felt the presence of Ross. He is pleased with my skills, and enjoys watching me work. This time, I asked him to give a special blessing to the newborn. He did. It felt so good to have his help in welcoming this new child to the world. She was beautiful, amazingly beautiful, so much so that I took an extra picture just of her as I  took the usual photos of mom holding the little on for the first time, and dad proudly watching.

Guess what?

The little one has red hair!

Just like Ross.

That's how he got his nickname.

As a baby he had red hair too. Rosso means 'red'. Ross is his childhood nickname.

One day perhaps I will share with you what was mine when we lived that life too.

We were the best of friends! I was born five and a half years younger than him. He fixed my toys when they broke. I always looked up to him. We were school mates, and as I grew, we became the best of friends.

We had no idea we were 'arranged' to be together!

When they told me I was to be married, they didn't tell me who. They described him, his attributes, his family. I was shaking like a leaf with fright! How could I leave Ross? He is the only one in my heart! How could this happen?

Then there he was! With a smile! Ross was HIM, the one to whom I'd been promised (they told me his given name, the one I did not know, on purpose, just to make me happy for the surprise. The same was for him, too, he had no idea it was me.)

It was a good life together. A very happy one.

We go way back.

One day perhaps I will share more of our story with you. For now, this is plenty...

Aloha and Mahalos,
Namaste,

Reiki Doc

Too Scared To Do Reiki: Code Sepsis

Yesterday was a short day at work. I was torn between seeing mom and heading home to 'catch up' on everything that had been 'falling behind' since she got ill before New Year's Day. That included sleep.

I spoke on the phone with my sister who lives close for an hour. At her request I called the doc on staff at the nursing home where mom had been admitted by her health care plan for post-surgical rehabilitation. It is not the best place*, but the only place insurance was willing to pay for it. There are times when as a doctor you have to take your knowledge of medicine, use it like a baseball bat, and aim it at a provider who is not doing 'enough' for your loved one.  I have a list of concerns about mother. Shall we go over them one by one? There are four... and I carefully clicked off each organ system and disease process that was dramatically (read: medically indefensible) out of whack. This doc 'saw the light' and disclosed that 'she needs a higher level of care'. No Duh. Even the urology attending could hear a lung process on her follow-up visit last week!

A large part of medicine, in practice, is the avoidance of things that if left unchecked could grow into greater problems. You 'head it off at the pass'.

This is where medical ignorance and 'burnout' are deadly. I once had a fellow intern who would not check labs because then there would be more work to do and more problems to fix. He got let go from the training program a couple of years later. Checking labs is how you get your patient better.

Mom was floridly septic upon arrival to the E.R. last night. They called a 'code sepsis'. She was hanging between life and death. I dropped everything, picked up the kids from school, ate a quick bean and cheese burrito with them, and drove an hour into thick traffic to say our goodbyes.

This is where I was too scared to to Reiki. I didn't want to know with my own mother how close to death she was; there is a characteristic slowing of the chakras until they stop completely. 

Instead I said, 'I accept whatever happens. I accept. I accept.'

The full-court press in the E.R. worked. On Levophed (norepinephrine), mom had a blood pressure that was compatible with life. But her WBC count was over fifty. I have never seen anybody make it with a count as high as this. Her internist said she has seen someone make it, but it took a long time to recover.
She also asked if mom was DNR. She knew from my sister that mom was full-code, full-care.

We surgeons called the Medical ICU 'The Death Star'. Unlike our surgical one, few made it out of the MICU alive. One of the reasons is the intensivists were so quick to make everybody DNR (do not resuscitate).

So I told her, specifically--Yes for chest compressions; Yes for chemical code; Yes for electrical code; Yes for intubation.

I was surprised at how confident she was that 'her chest x-ray is clear therefore her lungs are not the source'. Everyone who has had medical training knows that the clinical picture in a CXR can 'lag behind' the clinical presentation of the patient by two days. I pointed out that her breathing was labored and respiratory rate was high, she was gurgling with ineffective cough, and although her oxygen saturations were 100% she was going to tire soon. She would require intubation. We discussed tube sizes--the intensivists like a big one (8.0 or 7.5) to do pulmonary toilet, but the last time she had a tube emergently she couldn't talk right for six months after. So 'be careful' please?

We three sisters took turns with mom and the others with the kids. She was talking but weak.

When it came time to say goodbye, as the kids have school and I have work (docs can't 'call in'), I touched her arm and gave Reiki. I did what my Reiki teacher taught me to do, but with my mind/energy, not all the positions. Great peace reached both of us. I saw mom relax. I felt myself relaxing too. Her energy system was weak but not 'checking out' like I had feared. In our Reiki tradition, we give the Transition Symbol, to help make the crossing over to the Other Side easier. I gave this symbol to her. (I had also asked for prayer,healing, and Reiki on every list I know.)

Reiki is a wonderful gift at the end of life, especially when it is a close bond. It heals both the recipient and the giver.  If you haven't taken a Reiki Class, I would suggest it, if only for this one time for its use. It is worth it to take the training to have it available when your loved ones are very sick. Mom is being kept alive by chemicals right now. When the nurse giving break futzed with the Levophed pump because of 'air bubbles', I saw mom's BP drop from 120 systolic to 80 systolic. It took the regular RN coming back to 'fix it' with the pump. I pointed out mom's vitals, and said to him, 'she missed you' and he laughed. It takes a very alert and vigilant nurse and doctor, both, to keep a person this very sick, alive.

I thank you for all the Love and Reiki that you have sent. I can feel it, and it helps tremendously.

Namaste,

Reiki Doc

* SIX patients from the same insurance policy were 'bounced back' to the system hospital from the SNIF rehab center that same day. My sister overheard the ER nurse comment to another RN that 'the doctor there is making rounds again', implying that the medical care was suboptimal at this place.