Officially, Earth is in a time of renewal. Today is St. Joseph's Day. The Swallows will come back to San Juan Capistrano today too. And tomorrow marks the official First Day of Spring.
For those who are closest to the earth, the signs have been there of heading towards Springtime for some time now. Here in Southern California, the fruit trees have new leaves and flowers, the figs have large leaves and baby figs already, and the citrus are blooming with their wonderful scent of Heaven.
There has been a lot of growth going on inside of me, but it wasn't until yesterday that I felt both 'new' and 'clean' on the inside. Many, many baby Christians have experienced something like this, where their trust and faith in Our Savior helped them to start a new life away from their old life of pain and sin.
My problem had plagued me for so long I had accepted it as an inevitable part of life. Complex PTSD, feelings of shame, feelings of not being good enough, feelings of being damaged goods in the most painful and delicate of ways inside my heart.
It has lifted.
I feel free inside, and whole. It's hard to describe it. But it has been worth the struggle and the fight to regain wholeness.
It couldn't have come at a better time. Next week Jared is getting married. If you've ever seen When Harry Met Sally you will know just how devastating it is to the ex. It's poignant. He's moving on with his life. And I've not really had 'a life' because I've been busy raising the child and putting priorities on doing this successfully.
Last night Anthony went to a bonfire at Doheny beach with his friends. One car is in the shop, he took the other one. I needed to replenish my energy, it's been low, mostly from lots of work. And I took a warm bath, it felt just like being at the Sensei Lanai in one of their onsen. I watched a little TV--there was absolutely nothing on broadcast channels, but Ross guided me to Taylor Tomlinson the comedian. I laughed so hard and realized that in my own way, I'm even a little better off having healed the way I have. It was shocking to see how the average citizen of the US is in comparison. You can tell by the jokes and the way they are tolerated and the subjects in the jokes.
What am I going to do this weekend?
A lot of resting and renewal deep inside. It's been a lot of work to heal. A lot of talking with Spirit. Many little chores around the home. And a lot of letting go.
I'm making it clear to both Ross and Divine Father what I want out of this life. And why. How I feel. My soul finally after all these incarnations gets a chance to speak up and release all that has been quietly waiting inside my heart.
What is the lesson?
Well, most of us carry shame and feelings of loss and failure. It is programmed into us from childhood, because our parents were programmed by their parents and so on, and childhood on its own is a pretty tough experience.
Like Hope Johnson says, you don't have to feel those feelings. You can choose to feel only LOVE 24/7. That's how it's meant to be.
I had a little trouble with the 'dissolving' of those icky feelings. Hope says you just feel them, and then they dissolve. Perhaps for me it was the PTSD part, perhaps it was the whole being incarnate and remembering Home. I don't know.
But I put it 'out there' that I wanted to heal or die trying to heal. And I found some Crappy Childhood Fairy on YouTube that had overcome similar obstacles. You see, there's no 'finish line' for healing from stuff like this. With Cancer you either have it or you don't, right? But her video on Ten Signs You Are Healed gave me hope! I wasn't as bad off as I thought. I could understand her logic and examples, and truly, I hadn't been acting like that for a long time. A very long time.
Somehow that set in motion the lightening of my being. Here I am today, feeling much better and much different in my usual 'pockets of pain' I carry.
The other thing that helped, was talking to Barbara because she had the unique perspective of recently being incarnate, but also now in Heaven. And I shared from my heart about the weight and responsibility I carry as a soul, as partner and Twin to Ross, and how as an earthly person and soul who has been through so much I just can't take it any more! Somehow, when we reach our limit, Spirit gives us an extra scoop of something or other to help us carry on. So this may have played a part in my healing too.
Ross and I are still working on our healing together as a couple, over what happened. A whole new layer of pain has opened up in me, for this part. Fortunately I am accustomed to soul pain, I can function with it like someone who has fibromyalgia or severe arthritis manages to function, and compared to the feeling dirty and broken pain from this incarnation (with overtones from our past one, of course), it is overall much lighter and easier to manage.
How does this effect the Earth and the global geopolitical scene?
A heck of a lot more than anything you would see on mainstream media, or alternative news, or in any history book.
I'm serious.
Why?
Because the enemy of TWDNHOBIAH--their enemy decided by them and they have been attacking it brutally since they ever set foot on this planet and time began--is the Divine Feminine.
Every human incarnate who reclaims their Divine Feminine in any form of healing--is a powerful, Heaven-supported upheaval of the status quo.
Energetically, this goes far and wide with a ripple effect. All the spells and enchantments working by magic to keep the people in a stupor of magic weaken. By a lot.
The more we are able to reclaim what is ours, our birthright, our Consciousness and our Heavenly Balance within between a healthy Divine Masculine and Divine Feminine, the more our teams win! Further, the more we begin working together, as couples, as community, as Family (as in One Big Human Family)--the faster the opposition will weaken and dissolve.
Remember what is Good and True.
There is One Truth.
I personally find it funny how so many people feel that Truth is what they choose to believe in or not. Perhaps the term for that is 'my perception of Truth'. But the real TRUTH doesn't budge for anything because it is TRUTH. Believe it or not, that's fine, but it's kind of hard to ignore/no believe something so freaking obvious it runs the entire Universe, right?
To keep things simple, let's call that Truth LOVE. The Divine Energy of Creator that makes everything out of nothing in the physical world, the spiritual world, and the stars in Heaven.
Don't worry about trying to convert others to be able to 'see Truth'--everything is always filtered by our perceptions. Just honor TRUTH however you perceive it. And try not to get so attached to it that you freak out if something happens and you realize what you 'thought' was 'true' actually isn't. Even if you were a long ways off and your 'truth' was like, one hundred eighty degrees in the opposite direction, Creator's love for you is unchanged and will never change. You are so WORTHY of this love! And the LOVE is so amazing and incredible, hang on to that, let go of the fear and crazy weird everything else, and enjoy it!!!!
In the meantime, keep struggling to bring up everything to the surface and heal.
The Divine Feminine (your entire PLANET and Divine Mother Creator on top of that!) are counting on you to anchor and balance and heal on your end so this entire reality can be flooded and tipped and rebalanced energetically to a point where everyone is awake, everyone is absolutely revolted by conflict like war, and everyone can see through the total fucking bullshit of TWDNHOBIAH. And also, may their minions/victims have expedited healing through their various personalities/dissociation/trauma-based mind control.
Ross
Carla is talking about -- for one minute--compassion for the self. There is a steady stream of 'self-talk' we subject ourselves too. But is the voice in our head really our own? Or is it the voice of generations of parents who have raised us and guided us to be 'all that we could be'?
And furthermore, what percentage of this steady stream of information is controlled by TWDNHOBIAH by the media and propaganda that is 'already out there'?
The space between your ears belongs to YOU and to Divine Creator, both the Masculine and the Feminine. That is why you have autonomy as a human and as an incarnate soul.
You are free to believe that which you wish.
And also you are free to change that belief system at any time.
It helps us as your guides if you are clear with us about what you want to change and why.
For example with Carla, it would go something like this:
C: Divine Father I hate my life script I feel yucky and I don't know why I ever agreed to it.
DF: Well, tell me, beloved Carla, why is this? What could be better and how would you feel about it?
C: She tells him everything from her Perspective, submitting completely to all soul agreements made and karma she owes and honoring her Life Script promises/agreement, even though she hates it. She is looking for loopholes and ways to adjust her life within these constraints to make it better for her.
DF: Doesn't really say much of anything, but listens, and takes everything in.
Carla has had similar conversations like this with me. And she is growing in her confidence to be able to be her own best advocate with what is left of her incarnation, however long that is meant to be.
It is by growing closer through these conflicts that the Divine Feminine has a chance to strengthen itself and heal from the imbalance of undue and unwanted exposure to massive amounts of Unhealthy Masculine energy.
Put this in your pipe and smoke it (he's teasing a mutual friend, our best friend) and put it into action in your lives, seeking the optimum balance for you and for your interactions with your loved ones.
May you experience the pure unconditional love of the Heavenly Realms, 24/7, 265, and may it uplift you and overwhelm you into joyous interactions everywhere you go, and with everyone you meets.
By taking care of YOU and your own imbalances--the little things in our lives--we make it energetically impossible for darkness to 'tip the scales' and bring horror and dismay upon the world stage!
Why?
Because we know better!
And there is only One Truth!
clap! clap!
Aloha and Mahalos,
Namaste,
Peace,
Ross and Carla
The Twins <3
