It's been hard lately.
A little bit of my muscles are sore and I'm tired but happy--in my life.
And a little of really stopping to feel the feelings I'd buried so long ago, ones that are quite painful.
I work a lot, a lot, a lot, and when I come home I'm tired. The days are good, I'm not complaining. But I miss the times when I used to just space out on the couch and talk with Ashtar Sherhan.
It seems like so many years ago. Ten years, to be exact.
And, I recall in 2012, when we didn't all Ascend, I was so bummed and completely heartbroken. Why? Because the next astronomical alignment was in 2025! So many years, right?
Here we are.
I've grown a lot more on the inside, I had no idea I was walking around with those scars I had inside. Today I have found lots of support, and they are healing. Slowly. But I know the basics of how to look for red flags, how to communicate more effectively, about the delicate balance between the Divine Feminine and the Divine Masculine, and how to maintain strong boundaries in my relationships. It's good.
If I had experienced Group Ascension back then, and needed to interact like I do back Home, then I would have been relying on my Amnesia to be suddenly lifted in order to function. Today, I'm chipping away at the Amnesia by gaining valuable interpersonal skills. It reminds me of those who lift weights and body build while they are in jail. There's nothing else to do, right? Might as well get stronger in the meantime.
What has changed?
I made a promise to stop Frog Farming forever. (The Queen's Code is an excellent resource on how to learn that).
I'm slowly processing the painful childhood experiences...the deepest healing couldn't take place until my mom passed and her estate settled.
With Anthony in school I've adapted better than expected. It's good we are both growing, him discovering himself, and me, rediscovering myself.
My health--my knee--improves.
What is lacking?
Motivation. Joy. Being able to plan things and look forward to them. Carrying out my 'to do' list. I find I respond well to fresh air and sunshine. I try to get as much of that as I can. I think I am going to need to schedule more time off for myself just to decompress because the work is so intense. I headed into this week thinking I needed to get things done around the house, and actually, I need to invest into myself a little first.
I feel scattered.
But not in a bad way.
I feel like God is nearing the completion of the demolition phase of my life, and I'm giving Creator permission to remodel me into whatever it is I'm destined to be. I'm not riding on the influence of people on The Other Side I know and who love me. I'm not even thinking about who I am when I am Home. I sense at some point the me here will be the exact same as the me There. Same old me. To whoever I meet.
The other thing is that there's still lots of opportunity to help others. It's the best way to heal a number of things that concern us.
Do I think we are Ascending?
Yes.
I see more and more signs of it. For example, over the weekend--I found--or should I say, it found me!--a little fair with pop-ups of businesses that specialize in autism services! Sensory toys. Special vacation places for families affected by autism. Dance companies which specialize in special needs dance lessons. There were groups that helped families navigate the various social services too. There was a horse with the mane and tail dyed rainbow like a unicorn next to two other horses by a trailer. Not sure if they were therapy animals or not, but they were so beautiful to see.
This wouldn't have been possible in the eighties. People used to play down such family members. Now, it's a thing. And there is support.
It's just a tiny example of things overall getting better. People seem more genuine and kind everywhere I go. This is a welcome thing!
Ross
I would like to share an example of Carla's growth. Yesterday while relaxing and watching TV, a small mouse-like critter boldly walked across the carpet and climbed into the entertainment center cabinet.
Carla remembered her mother having rats living inside the couch at her place, and groaned inwardly. With just one person in a home, there's not enough noise to keep the animals at their distance.
She had also left the door open while taking out the compost the other day, and understood the opportunity.
Instead of freaking out, immediately she went to find a trap and set them with peanut butter.
Nothing happened during the night. Nor in the morning.
She looked quickly through the cabinet, it didn't appear there were nests there. And it was a tiny bit of tiny poops just behind the entertainment center on the side where she had seen the 'mouse' approaching.
What could she do?
She's been through it plenty at her old house.
Just wait.
Well, today after exercise class, she came home, and was startled to see not one but two tiny baby rats with long long tails, in the traps!
She took them outside after notifying Anthony what had happened, both last night and today.
Then she let the trapped ones out of their misery.
There is not even a blip on the emotions. Not even upset. Simply action. It's like keeping your shoulders down instead of letting the stress tension make them raise up when you are exercising.
Now, that is a warrior who has been through training!
clap! clap!
Aloha and Mahalos,
Namaste,
Peace,
Ross and Carla
The Couple
