It's been three weeks to the day since the surgery on my thyroid.
I feel much better and my scar is even a little less tight at the front of my neck.
Recovery from surgery may give the illusion that I have been lounging in bed, ordering takeout, and letting the housework 'go'.
I haven't.
I needed these three weeks.
Why?
Because mothering is a full-time job, and it never stops.
As long as I had the drain in my neck, Anthony understood I had just had surgery, and he offered to help and let me rest.
The drain was out in two days.
I have done a lot of cooking, a lot of dishes, a lot of laundry once I was really starting to feel better. Anthony is learning to drive too. He needs practice. His first official lesson was the day after my surgery. So the day after that, he drove us to breakfast. It's been so important to him to learn, that my needs have taken a back seat, or in my case, 'riding shotgun' in the passenger seat, and holding my head gently so the too fasts and the abrupt stops wouldn't pull on the stitches.
It's been a routine of dropping him off to practices and classes, picking him up, and just being home.
It's been wonderful. Absolutely wonderful.
And I truly appreciate all the work mothers do now. It really is WORK. Keeping a household running is not easy to do.
What helped me the most are the naps. The naps in the sunshine in the hammock. The naps on the couch. The going to bed super early. And the sleeping in 'late', which for most people is early but since I'm a super early riser, it's been deliciously luxurious to sleep in.
Today is my last day at home.
I haven't had continuous time off since the end of 2019 when I took four days.
Times are different.
Life changes.
And we move on.
I'm super excited to get back to the OR since I recently had surgery. I'll 'get it' a little better what my patients are going through.
Retirement would be something really nice, to have time at home, and to enjoy. But that needs an income. So, it's time.
I'm so grateful for these three weeks. They couldn't have happened at a better time. Anthony's driving is much better. I'm not as stressed. His swim team is back in full season preparation.
Spiritually, Ross and I are closer than ever. I've gotten through some big lessons in these weeks.
I had a strange dream last night. I was trying to take care of patients, and there was this weird dark shadowy man trying to stop me. His skin was all curled and flaky like dried mud.His color was dark grey.Even, thought. He didn't really have hair or eyes like humans. His size was human. I don't know who it was. But I'm not afraid of him. I feel strong enough to deal with whatever happens.
I do know lots of times when I have dreams like this, I must be doing the right thing because it must have popped up on the 'radar' and someone noticed and sent the dream to try to rattle me. This has been going on for years.
Ross
Carla has done a remarkable feat! Three meals on the table most days. Doing most of the dishes and housework by herself. It's starting to take shape, the household, and it's almost worthy for guests. At least those who really love them and can look the other way a little.
I want to write about something Carla did for the first time yesterday.
Anthony wanted ice cream. She had already taken him to breakfast earlier in the day. Dining out is no longer cheap as it once was. Their tab was fifty dollars.
She explained politely to him that she needs to watch her money since she hasn't been working. Once a day is enough, actually, once in a while is enough.
He drove them to Costco for gasoline and a few necessities.
At the checkout stand, he asked, again, 'mom can I get an ice cream from here?'
For the first time, Carla said, 'no honey, I'm trying to get you thin. When we are home I will make you tea. If you can't stand being without ice cream, you can then have some at home after your tea.'
Anthony was in shock!
His mother is usually so good-natured, and happy to help!
Sometimes placing a boundary is a good thing. And in this case, the citrus honey tea was enough to satisfy the sweet tooth. And after swim practice, the dinner was light and there was no need for dessert.
Everything has its right time and place.
Before Carla's time at home, observing Anthony and his habits, she wouldn't have known what to say or do. Lots of times when he was growing up he was in the care of others--Carla's mom, the preschool and their various snacks, the baby sitter...
Carla knows her son.
And this time she loved him enough to say no when it was in his best interest.
Think about it.
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Aloha and Mahalos,
Namaste,
Peace,
Ross and Carla
The Couple
