Lost Girl Found

This is a story.
I write it at the request of someone who is deceased.
This someone was my father...once upon a time...

Today I was eating my lunch at Au Lac. I sit at the counter. And Papa Ito came in! He is the ghost there,  the father of the chef. I have taken messages for him, in the past. I have been shown a miracle--a perfect red heart in the marble on the wall that is still present that Papa Ito pointed out to me.

Let me go back in the story, so you will understand.

I had such a strong desire to know Ito since the first day we met, my soul was longing for this reconnection every single day. I thought he was my twin flame, my twin soul! This silent raw vegan chef who I didn't know from Adam, felt like the kindest, warmest soul I had met in a long time. And there was something about him I couldn't place...

I kept coming back to figure it out. The one time I first saw Papa Ito, he came back to me at my home, and asked me to write for him a message. I wrote what Papa Ito asked me to write, and gave it to Ito--who gave no response whatsoever.

Then came the memory, and why I had to seek forgiveness.. Imagine this little boy above as Ito, only about three months younger and wearing only a diaper. Imagine the look of horror and shock on the boy's face as his father was holding him up over his head and shaking him violently. Imagine a frightened little girl not much older than him who was wanting to help but in fear for her own safety, holding back and having her heart torn in pieces by the suffering of her younger brother.

That was me.

And the memory stopped. I have no recollection of that life, except that I died young.

I asked Ito for forgiveness, for what I did in the past life. It would have been better to act, and to get hurt, for him to learn that there is someone who cares about him, and that anger and abuse is not right. Instead, I protected myself and stayed still and silent.

He forgave me. And I forgave him for my soul wanting to know him, reaching out, and his not giving me the time of day...for his letting my spirit ache for him for such a long time. The two karmas 'cancelled'.

So every time I see Ito, I want to make sure he feels like this. I had been buying him little presents and things to make him laugh before the memory for some time. I did not understand why I felt the need to do such things for him. Now I see that as his sister, I want his happiness more than anything, even if I am reborn and now younger than him, my soul connection to him is one of older sister.

I feel great pride every time I see my little brother and his accomplishments after a childhood as rough as ours.

I have been told by those close to him, that he once had a sister who had died.

I was told this after I shared my story which I had told no one except them and now as I tell you at the request of Father.

When Papa Ito came in today, I was feeling like this.

C:  Hi Papa! Long time no see! how are you?  (my heart filled with love for him)

PI: I drank.

C:  I know that Papa. Everyone knows that about you!

PI:  I hit. I was violent. 

C:  I know that too. (when I wrote the channelled message for Ito, there was an apology along those lines to him.)

PI:  (very long pause)  I killed you.

And then I saw an image, very clear, of a little girl and a struggle, and him striking her in anger with his bare hands, and her lying deathly still. It was true. My heart filled with love and forgiveness for him.

C:  Oh Papa! (I sensed that he wanted forgiveness, but there was nothing to forgive. All there was now was a powerful sense of love and family between us. It did not change.)

And with that, Papa Ito went away. He found peace.

For all of the interaction with Papa Ito, I have no recollection, or contact, with my mother from that life. I don't know why, and I don't question it.

The lesson that is here for each of us, is that love is more powerful than death, even when someone close to you in fact, kills you in a past life.

The reconnection is more important for the healing overall.

There have been other lives where I died in order to teach a soul lesson to help a struggling soul out of darkness;  in seeing the horror they had created, they woke up spiritually and began the journey home to the Light.

This is the energy of Papa Ito now. He is wise. He is loving. He is not affected by anger and chemicals. He has found his peace. He is joyful with the hope of helping his loved ones from where he is now.

Isn't that a miracle?




Aloha and Mahalos,
Namaste,
Peace,


Reiki Doc

Happy Birthday Mai With Much Love

A true gift is from ourselves, from our heart...little did I know how I would give a gift like this today...

My friend Mai has a birthday sometime around now. She doesn't like people to know. I bought a card, and I went to visit her.

I remember thinking there should be some gift I should bring, or put into the card, but spirit said, 'nope, this is fine, just bring this.'

As I sat next to her while eating lunch with her and her lovely daughter, Linh, I thought, 'well, what they say is true--sometimes our presence is a present.'

Mai gets up and walks around. A lot. She's busy. Spending time with her is like spending time with a blur, but our hearts are close and I have gotten used to it.

I shared today the story of how Nana Angelina crossed over, and how I assisted her, and Mai had a tear in her eye. She didn't know I help people to cross over to the light, and that I have for twenty-two years. Mai is spiritual. She is okay with it, my being 'different' in this way.

Linh is surprisingly open-minded in her spirituality too. Today we talked, when Mai was away, about Illuminati. It turns out that the YouTube video I most recommend to explain their connection to the music industry has been pulled. The whole channel. Because of 'multiple copyright infringements'. Funny, it made the channel look more 'right' and YouTube less so for bowing to corporate interests instead of airing the truth...

Then she asked, since she knows I can see spirits, if there is anyone 'around her'.

I looked, and to her left shoulder was an older lady who looked like her Aunt Kim, whom I have met.

Linh was confused. "Is this my father's mom or the one who raised my dad?" she asked.

I didn't know there were two moms. Apparently the father had a baby with another woman who was not his wife, while he was married. The wife and the father raised it. This love child grew up to be Linh's dad, and Mai's husband. And he is a colleague of mine, whom I have known longest of all of them. And I never knew!

I looked to the spirit, who wouldn't say exactly who she was. But the family resemblance was strong, so I insisted it was whoever was related to Aunt Kim. It was the woman who had raised her dad, a woman she had never met. She had died of tuberculosis. Apparently when she had died, her 'son' was present, and she kept looking at him, and had tears running down her face. She had loved him.

'Was there any advice on how she died?' Linh wanted to know.

'Don't smoke'. I heard and shared. Linh said that her 'grandmother' had breathed a lot of second-hand smoke from her husband.

The 'grandmother' said she loved Linh very much, and was with her every day. She is also blessing Linh's new business venture.

Linh asked why her 'grandmother' was so very strict?

This came through as a thought-picture. The grandmother was concerned the son might have inherited the 'tendency to have sex without control' from his birth mother, and kept a tight rein on him to make sure he turned out right. He did. A concert pianist and a doctor.

Linh was also wondering is 'anyone else' was there? As she asked, I noticed the presence of an elderly Vietnamese male over her right shoulder. It was her grandfather, her father's father.

He explained that he had fallen in love with two women, and had sought comfort with the mother, never intending her to get pregnant. With the war it was very turbulent times and they were difficult on everyone.

'Where did they meet?' Linh asked.

At a bar.

He also said he was not able to show favor to his son, because of the delicate balance with his wife raising his 'love child'. He had to always reassure his wife that 'her babies were the best'.

Linh asked if the birth mother died in childbirth?

The answer was no. She lived. And she had watched the boy growing up but he never knew who she was in the village, that she was related to him.

Mai came and sat next to me. She caught up with the family story, and was totally confirming details, and enjoyed how the truth was coming out at last, on why her husband is the way he is, and how he was raised with so little affection.

A beautiful woman with facial features like this came over Lihn's left shoulder. The hair was jet black, and pulled up in a single barrette up the middle, and very long hair to her waist. Her face was stricken, with huge eyes, and I felt her energy as if she was stepping forward in spite of herself. The other female figure stepped back.

I am not worthy to come here!!! I felt her thoughts of fear and shame. She started to pull back.

I closed my eyes and concentrated. I didn't want to lose her. She was in trouble as a soul, with her heart. I called Ross, and he came, quick. She looked at Ross, who gently held her left arm in his right hand, at the elbow. She calmed down.

Here is her story:  She loved the father. She didn't know he was married. She loved him with all her heart. When she got pregnant, the truth came out, that he had another. She looked at her options--to be a beggar or a prostitute with the child? To have him be shunned as he grew up? With no future? Or to give him away, the only thing to do to save their honor--of all three of them--the wife, the husband, and herself. She watched him growing up, and she knew she had made the right choice, but it was difficult. She chose his welfare over her own. She never had another man. She never married. But those were different times. She lived a quiet life and she kept to herself.

She also came very close to me, with an object in her hand. She wanted to give it to her son. It was wrapped in cloth and string, a rectangle about one foot long and about eight inches wide. I had never seen anything like it before in my life. I had to ask what it was?

It was a doll for her son to hold because he could not be with her.

It was a handmade doll of cloth.

I could tell it was her heart's longing to be there for him, and give him the affection he so badly lacked while growing up. Mentally I accepted it, and handed it to Mai.

Mai listened with interest. Again, there was a tear rolling down her face. She said she had heard that the mother was a very close childhood friend of the 'grandmother', the woman who raised her husband. She always felt that she did not die in childbirth, and that something was not right in the stories that she had heard.

The birth mother explained that Mai was especially chosen for her husband. She is a real woman who is loving and PRESENT and worries for his health. She is not some dreamy person. She gets in his face and lets him know how she feels (for his health, for example, his diet and his medicine) and there is no denying he is LOVED by her, he KNOWS it unmistakably in his heart. This was to make up for his childhood, which was not so pleasant.

Then the birth mother reached into her heart, and showed me a flower. It looked like a small sunflower, but was orange. It was a spirit flower, and she pinned it into Mai's aura. I struggled to describe what kind of flower it was...

It was a lotus. she said, very clearly.

And she went away.

We had been doing the mediumship a long time. So long in fact that all three of us had to go use the lavatory! We were back in the 'normal world' again, and I gave thanks for the messages that were shared with us by Spirit today.

Sometimes a mother's love is the most beautiful thing of all...



Aloha and Mahalos,
Namaste,

Reiki Doc


P.S. as it was time for me to go, Mai whispered in my ear how her husband will be glad to know the story of his origin. The amount of peace I felt in the room, between Linh, Mai, and the 'love triangle', humbled me and made me give thanks for the gift I was able to assist the communication with, for all of them.

Spirit was right.

Nothing in the card! But not empty handed. It was filled with Blessings, Love, and Light...

Optimism--Gratitude--Hope

For the past three days I have experienced increasing pain in my left ankle.

Left ankle? That is root chakra, and receives...someone is sending me a message that they are in threat for their survival....

It hurt!

There was no injury I could recollect. I had gone paddle boarding, but I didn't fall or stretch it. Perhaps it was inflamed because of overuse?

It hurt all day. So much so that I applied a layer of tiger balm to it in the afternoon.

I wore different shoes when I went out to dinner, ones that would be more gentle on the feet.

And before I went to bed? About ten minutes of laser treatment, with the setting on 'inflammation', and then a thick coating of red tiger balm on it.

It hurt so much I could barely hop into bed!

This morning all of the pain I had experienced it GONE.

The leg feels a little stiff, but otherwise looks and feels the same as the other one!

The Laser (Mandala Sphere laser) WORKS!

And I never took a single ibuprofen.

Well, what about the spiritual/energy significance of the ankle?

According to Louise Hay and Mona Lisa Shulz, M.D. , in the book, All Is Well, the ankle represents imbalance in the form of inflexibility and guilt. Ankles represent the ability to receive pleasure.

The affirmation to remedy this is, 'I deserve to rejoice in life. I accept all the pleasure life has to offer.'

Yesterday I went out of my way to assist someone on their Journey.

Someone who traveled to Southern California. I was in traffic for over an hour, almost an hour and a half, to reach their hotel. I drove them to my favorite Living Foods/RAW/vegan restaurant. I introduced them to Ito and to Mai and Linh. All of this person's friends from the conference on Longetivity Now were at this restaurant too. She was like, 'Wow! Everyone is here! I can't believe it!'

It was like watching someone find an oasis in the desert, it was so much fun!

It was magical, the healing environment and the food.

(But my ankle still hurt...that's why I used the laser before bedtime.)

Make Someone Happy by Monica Ramey and Beegle Adair

http://youtu.be/fEmG6_lNL9A

Ross sent me this on the way to work yesterday.

I had a short day.

It turns out a friend of mine, a recovery room nurse who had asked me to do the anesthesia for her c-section two years ago, had just had her baby. She didn't like the other hospital she had switched to. Her doctor works at both that one and mine. So for an emergency, she came and my other friend did her anesthesia.

I came to see her and the baby.  It was so beautiful to see them as experienced parents this time. And the father offered to let me hold her. I won't say the child's name, because of privacy, but it is beautiful, French, and what I will share is that her middle name is Grace.

As I held the newborn, a special love and glow filled my heart. It was so warm, and nurturing, and filled with compassion for the being who is going to begin a new life!

And Ross 'popped in' to my awareness...

I asked him to bless the child. I could tell he enjoyed being with us in the moment too. He smiled, And gently, he kissed her on the head, and he left.

Yesterday was my 'other birthday'.

On February 6, 1990, I went to USCF and had neurosurgery. I had a micro adenoma of the pituitary. It was a prolactinoma. I experienced galactorrhea and amenorrea. And headaches and visual changes too.

I was scared out of my mind.

I could hear the clippers shaving the heads of the other patients in their 'bays' at the neurosurgery pre-op holding area as I waited for the surgery. Tears silently rolled down my face.

A voice came, and said, 'Is this (my name) with the tears?' in the most cheerful, loving, and kind manner.

It was my anesthesiologist.

Together she and her resident safely brought me through a very long surgery. My face is still numb because of it. Everything moves, you can't tell.

The afternoon after surgery I had nausea so bad from the drainage from my nose down my throat to my stomach, I threw up my own blood. I threw up so much I would soil my gown and get it all over the bucket.

Each time, the nurse would change me into a clean gown, and give me a new bucket.

We must have done this three or four times in a row.

After a while, I looked at her and said, 'Why do you keep changing my gown? I am only going to mess it up again.'

She looked at me and said, 'We can't let you be dirty!' as if it was the most natural thing in the world to clean up thrown up blood and change people's gowns all day when they have so much else to do. She had all the time in the world to help me...

And I prayed.

I prayed, Dear God, when all of this is over, please don't let me have thrown up my own blood in vain.

I prayed with my heart.

Last night, when I saw my friend (who is a CRNA and has serious health challenges) smiling and laughing at the restaurant that is owned by a woman who has had the same operation as me not once or twice but THREE times...and run by a buddhist who hasn't spoken a word in thirteen years--took a vow of silence...I saw the wonder that God can do.

It was a miracle.

My miracle!

And I am filled with Optimism, Gratitude, and Hope!

That's why I became an anesthesiologist.

So I could be just like her, my anesthesiologist, who was beautiful, kind and loving, capable and confidence, and able to look the horror of being a surgery patient in the face, and be strong enough to safely guide people through it...

And for the first time since 1990? I had my 'birthday', the anniversary of my life-changing surgery*, and never told a soul the whole day long!




Aloha and Mahalos,
Namaste,


Reiki Doc


P.S.   One year after the surgery I remembered abuse that had happened when I was four--the buried memory came up. That ended my marriage.
Then in my second marriage, ten years later, my husband developed the same pituitary tumor as me. It is extremely rare for both in a couple to have experienced it. He did a non-surgical approach, because his was wrapped around the carotids. That totally freaked me out. I wanted to run. But I stayed by his side the whole time. It wasn't until things got out of hand between us two years after--money and anger issues on his part--that the marriage dissolved, too.

Mai made her restaurant because all the surgery she had experienced had left her half dead and unable to function. Vegetarian lifestyle healed her symptoms, and gave her a purpose to live. She wanted to share her healing with others, through using food as 'medicine' (along with regular medicine in her case, but a minimum of it).  She started Au Lac.

Ito heard of her miracle. And he offered to help. He started as a server. It wasn't until some time later that she learned 'he can cook!'.

And how!

He is the best RAW vegan chef in the world.

So now you know how God works...the day Mai told me she had the same surgery as me, and more, I looked at her beautiful face and went, 'God? Thank you! She is NORMAL and her life only got better after her illness!'

I thank God for her and for Au Lac from my heart, 24/7. <3