It's building up.
The resilience.
While seemingly doing 'nothing', and living every day that's not much different from the rest, clarity is forming. Lots of old ways of being I am stepping out of like an old costume. An internal sense of justice and what's fair and what isn't is coming online.
I treat myself much better now than I ever have. I stopped the weird dieting and am listening to my body more. It's been hard undoing a lifetime of putting others before myself, that was sealed in stone by the time I graduated from residency.
For this I am grateful.
Look for similar changes in yourself. You might not recognize them at first. The changes are so subtle. Super slow and hard to notice.
The goal is to be the most vibrant and authentic representation of YOU...and let others deal with it as you are unapologetically YOU who was Created by Divine Creator and have every right to walk to planet at this time!
What are forces helping me in this? Exercise. Having to stay in a budget and really watch the cash flow. Acceptance of What Is. And having patience when so many obligations challenge me. And routine! ahhhh routine, routine, routine...including daily fun with things that make me feel like I am eight years old. Lately it's been watching old episodes of Columbo,
What are forces hindering? Too much screen time. Finding balance between things I want to do, things I need to do, and things that are required of me. Getting sucked in to ruminating thoughts when people push my buttons.
When I stop and think about it, the things hindering me are actually more opportunities to grow. They make me think about what I truly want and to alter my course.
This is a Spiritual war.
A parallel is my war with the neighborhood rats. I spend over fifty dollars a month on professional treatment at the home. But it is barely enough to keep up with the population. And they are SMART! I learned putting two sonic flashing devices under each hood keeps them out of the engine compartment. But now they climb into the space between the liner of the hood and the hood, cutting out the sound and the light. I can hear their fruit pits from the Sago palm rolling around when I open the hood. I had one fall out of a tiny hole too, the pit. So I, and later with Anthony's help, removed every single one of the hundreds of fruits off the Sago palm. They are highly toxic to dogs, it's not good to have them, plus the rats love them. Well now what? The rats ate every single loquat off my loquat tree! I know because I saw the residue (they don't like the skin) and seeds that were left behind.
And these are just rats!
Can you imagine how clever the darker spirits are who prowl the world unseen?
So give yourself the time and space to grow on your intended path. And sometimes taking a step away from the things , like my stepping away from writing more frequently--will help you find your voice and your strength. Especially if you are keeping up with regular spiritual practice.
Be strong.
Remember these times, difficult as they might seem, are special in a spiritual significance. Be glad you are here to experience them. And be glad for your brothers and sisters who are awake, for your Teams, and for your Purpose. Follow your heart it will guide you well.
Ross
Carla just had another run-in with her work. She went over eight hours working with no breaks and no food. Her blood sugar got low. She was cranky. And therefore was written up.
This time, Carla, instead of cringing, is witnessing the abuse of the anesthesiologists for what it is. In order to make money, the system runs at the expense of the anesthesiologists' health and composure!
So, realizing this is something her old boss encouraged, and is perpetuated in the system, she realizes that perhaps change may be an appropriate thing to consider. Does she really want to be treated like this? Is the money worth it to her? Already she has made one change to eliminate both late nights/overnights/and weekends. That has come at a price, less income and more politics. Carla is careful not to rock the boat. But new eyes and new self-worth and self-respect are coming into the picture.
Carla trusts in me and in my ability to guide her.
For you, on your path, I want you to focus on your inner stirrings and glimmers of emotions, and watch for patterns. You are guided in all Divine Ways. And never worry, a few wrong steps and you will be guided ever more strongly back onto your intended path.
That is enough for today.
Clap! clap!
Aloha and Mahalos,
Namaste,
Peace,
Ross and Carla
The Twins
