This morning Ross had me sit for a moment while there was still sunshine. It's been raining.
I sat outside.
First he had me relax, completely, and not to concern myself with anything else.
Then, month by month, he had me look at what will be sure to be happening. And also, he asked me if there's anything I would like to do, during times I anticipate having vacation.
I saw Anthony turn eighteen, then his Spring Break travel, his graduation, and eventual college placement wherever it is meant to be. I saw myself with new patterns in my day, and new time for interests later in the year. I realized with happiness that both Thanksgiving and Christmas eve are mine this year, with the rotation we have for the co-parenting. Anthony likes to keep things fair between us, so he continues what the court set up for him, even though he's almost an adult.
I was calm instead of anxious.
I saw myself one year from now, asking myself the same things.
For some people New Year's is a time of renewal and hope.
For others, including myself, my thoughts tend a little towards the somber. For example, an image of my father wearing the 2009 eyeglasses on New Years when in June that would be when he passed...
Many things happen which we can control, and the ones we can't, well, we most certainly can control our reactions to them!
I was grateful for this meditation. I highly recommend it. It's never too late, really, to just imagine the year ahead, month by month...
I learned an important lesson last year. I'm not sure if I was able to mention it or if I just thought I had.
Everything is love.
It really is.
It's like this set of glasses or goggles that fit on you, and once you get them on you are like a little kid seeing right for the very first time. You're amazed by it. Romantic love, family love, love for coworkers, love for patients, love for pets, love for your garden, patriotism, is all LOVE. Anger, pain, suffering are from needs for love being thwarted in some way, sometimes going way back to our youth...these are cries for love that are greatly distorted. Even heading to the most distorted cruelty and sadism imaginable--these are sick, twisted reactions to a perceived lack of love. You don't need a romantic love to validate you. You are YOU. And when you look, the love shows up in mysterious and delightful ways! Sometimes when your family of origin is lacking, then the warmth and nurturing are made up with friends, yes? This is an example.
But most important today, truly, is the meditation.
I hope you enjoy experiencing it yourself!
Ross is smiling and nodding.
Aloha and Mahalos,
Ross and Carla