Last night, both Anthony and I wanted a nice cozy night at home to relax. I even wished I could have baked cookies--I never do.
He had homework due, 'three paragraphs'.
I did give him a smoothie he likes (coconut sugar and a banana and cocoa) and three oreos. (They were left over in my pocket, I got a pack for Halloween treat, from the office). I had almond milk and one oreo.
He couldn't believe it! He said, 'Mom! I have NEVER had an oreo in this house!'
So we got 'close' to my having cookies and milk when he came home...but the writer's block hit.
He couldn't research the Cheyenne Indians. He didn't know how to search. He looked at wiki. And some sites that quote wiki.
I didn't know how much to let him flail (and learn) or to help.
After two hours I said, 'Look, you need an outline, a stem, on paper to help you organize your thoughts!' I sat with him, and drew one for him. Then I found an educational site with a video.
The video was perfect but in the middle you learned you have to pay a monthly fee twenty dollars a month, just for the minimum.
I signed up for the five free days trial.
Then he went to take the quiz, online, and that cost more.
He was frustrated! He said, 'mom, don't spend more money.' He did watch the video over and over, and after dinner, was able to write.
I was glad to cook dinner. And as I made the salad and watched him struggle, I felt Spirit nudging me that 'what you seek does not exist' and instead, ' THIS is a different kind of cozy warmth for you two to enjoy'.
After the meal, I told him that he's taller than me now, and he needs to help out. We washed dishes together and put leftovers away for lunches together.
The last points are: breathing is important--as in yogi stuff. I'm reading about prana. That explains why when I do the deep breathing in meditation, I am fascinated by the times I'm not breathing--either all the way lungs full and hold for count to ten, or all the way empty and count to ten--because I FEEL something flowing into the top of my head. I didn't know what it was. Well it's Prana, a life force thing. It flows while you are breathing too, but you can't notice it because of the air movement.
I'm a beginner at this. Don't hold me to it, until I learn more. But it's good.
My Millerite came in the mail too. It's wonderful. A very good mineral, and it's giving it's blessings and benefit to everyone I heal, which includes you who read this.
Time is short. I am too. I must get the kitchen ready for our breakfast.
Ross is very quiet just today. That means he's busy. If there is an emergency, he will come, for a moment, but he's not 'hanging out' like he was earlier this weekend and week.
Our relationship comes and goes. And in a way, I've adjusted to it. Now having a partner--who is on the Other Side--who isn't always constant in his ability to be present--helps me to realize he has stuff to do like me. When he's quiet, I pray for him, for everything he does to be a success, and I do my best to learn my lessons.
Other times he's quiet is when I am being actively tested. I never know until it's over. I guess some people don't like an 'open book test' when it has to do with my growth and development, so he goes quiet until I demonstrate something mastered (I never know what). I know the tests because when they are over Ross gives me reinforcement and support and hugs and kisses, and tells me how I did.
Carla is very wise.
I suggest you listen to her. (he taps the breathing, the 'Ross has stuff to do and I pray for him', and the tests).
Aloha and Mahalos,
Ross and Carla