Messages from the End of the Road: Committed to Learning

 

The sky's the limit! 

Sometimes we believe we have everything 'all figured out'.  We are cruising along in our own lane. And it appears that absolutely nothing has changed, that things are still the same. This happens because you are learning important lessons unconsciously. Perhaps feeling feelings you had buried a long time ago? Perhaps building a new framework for your strengths you didn't realize you had in your personality?

I work a lot.

Money is tight.

I do my best to be a good person.

I have had some insights recently that knocked me on my bottom! Like, 'what the heck?' kind of insights. 

Remember Truth hurts sometimes.  There is something about being incarnate where you think if it is in your sphere of influence and you are comfortable with it, then you are fine. That is why the Truth hurts. It is sudden awareness of our misperceptions.

First one--I had focused on my losses when it came to Ross. I have been and continue to live in a world of pain from our past mutual incarnation relationship. He was not there for me. He vanished in a horrible way. He was no protector or provider back in those times (he is now, I give him credit).

It came to me after mass--his greatest triumph also happened to be my greatest loss. And for him, it was a Good Thing. And because I love him, I could at least acknowledge his Triumph and Success and be happy for him to have lived out his Life Plan to the letter. 

This is the first step in releasing my death grip on resentment against Divine Father for his plan, against Ross for going along with that plan, and to realize I played a pivotal role in the success of that plan myself--just at my own sacrifice of my life's hopes and dreams. The plan worked. I must have agreed to it on some level without my remembering I did. 

Is this gaslighting myself? No. Absolutely not. It is holding the space in my relationship with Ross, and with Divine Father, for two simultaneous truths at the same time. Yes, it sucked to be me back then. But it really was Ross' biggest achievement.

How about the second Truth?

Even though I was abandoned in pregnancy, and I have done everything I could to raise a good son, and my heart is happy I got to be a mother, it does not negate the fact that I had a baby out of wedlock. Many women do now. I 'broke the rules'. Here I am upset with that Only Fans woman for her sleeping with one thousand men, and even more upset because my own son is a victim to something along those lines with someone he says, 'is like a famous singer' (polite cough, yeah, right). Yes those are upsetting things against God's rules for a happy life. But just because I am focused on their blatant misperceptions, does not excuse me from my own. I sinned too. 

Do I understand why I sinned? Yes. Attachment trauma in the past. Severe trauma that I had been in denial about, trauma that caused deep psychological damage that makes it near impossible to bond normally to another human being. The reason that those attracted to me had been horribly abused and child protective services had to be called is because they were my mirrors I was not wanting to see.  People like me are raised to accept behaviors a healthier person would identify as 'red flags'. We think it is 'normal' to be mistreated.

Deep down, every sin is just like everything else, a cry for love. Sometimes it is very distorted. But all of us are crying for love down here in this virtual repeat of Sodom and Gomorrah. Yes it will be nice to have God take control and get rid of the insanity. But, be open and honest with yourself about how being in this environment has affected you. Be willing to admit your mistakes. Remember they are a cry for love. And accept the love however it arrives.

Acknowledge and accept your shortcomings. 

This has led me to a whole new way of breakthroughs in my personal life. 

I let go of the anger, and frustration over our new group at work being rejected for our Medi-Cal application. I explained politely that in Legal Zoom the Articles of Incorporation are the one sheet from the state awarding you corporationship. But the Bylaws are the parts that spells out who does what in the corporation. So it was my mistake not to include them in the request for the Articles of Incorporation. I thought they were two separate things.

End result? People helped me to resubmit it and it is in process. 

This was a ten thousand dollar mistake to our group. Because the state required an insurance policy. It cost that much. In August of last year. But now there is a second chance before August  and renewal. Late, but not lost money.

Recently I got a parking ticket when I picked Anthony up for Spring Break. It was for parking in the red zone. What had been a loading zone had been repainted.  I explained that I had just driven through bad traffic for two hours, and we were going to turn and drive back home for another hour an a half. I needed to pee. My son said I would be okay to go up to his apartment. So I ran. And I had the times of the texts, I had my Oura ring showing the activity of me running. I admitted I had made a mistake but I was thinking with my bladder and I am sorry it won't happen again. One hundred dollars is a fortune for me as a single mom. Would they please lower the penalty?

I was shown mercy. It was changed to a warning. 

Again, I made a mistake while ordering beautiful recycled plastic Adirondack chairs for the yard. The order went through funny on Amazon. So I clicked again. I ended up with eight chairs instead of the four! Each box weighs forty five pounds! I can't lift them. Because it was not sold by Amazon technically (their inventory) but through the company on Amazon, I needed to straighten this out. I told them I loved the chairs, just I had too many. The deal was four hundred dollars for the four chairs, but the expense was eight hundred. I needed the refund. Through patience and kindness of others, I was allowed to pay for two chairs to ship and they paid for two, so I paid a total of eighty dollars (taken off my refund) to return the chairs. Also, they helped me get this done before I take Anthony back to school for the Spring Quarter.

The lessons are mistakes happen. God knows it. Other people know it. And we manage them as best as we can. Others can be our mirrors, our teachers, our coaches and our guides. Be thankful for your experiences. Be kind and gentle with yourself when new awareness of Truth hits. Enjoy the day and the freedom we have been given to be spiritual beings having and Earthly experience.

clap! clap!

Aloha and Mahalos,

Namaste

Peace,

Ross and Carla

The Twins

Messages From The End Of The Road: New Insights

 

This week there was a special lecture about a certain famous shroud. I chose to attend. The place was packed. The lecturer was a famous Jesuit priest who also has his own TV show. He works for the diocese and our pastor works with him there and knows him. He is highly acclaimed.

I would like to share some insights from the lecture, as well as the new insight, which, isn't it ironic that someone who apprenticed to work with wood as a contractor was put to his end by being nailed himself to wood?

The long story short is that the carbon 14 dating is off because there was an electromagnetic radiation event that sent out lots of neutrons (uncharged particles) which created the image on the shroud. This image is not from dye or blood, as it only affects the topmost layer of the fibers of the linen.

The shroud itself is fourteen feet long, and it is made of exceptionally expensive, fine woven linen. 

The victim of the crucifixion is five foot ten inches tall.

The crown of thorns was a Syrian crown, not a circle like some show but more of a cap. It is not like a British crown that has parts that meet up over the top. It is a solid, almost beret like hemisphere with a ring  like band at the bottom. Oddly enough I can't find anything that even looks like the image he showed us on the internet. That is a big hmmmm. And this is what the crown was made of syrian christ thorn. They are thick at the base, taper to a point and curve in.

The shroud is a negative image. So what we see is like looking at what the negative in film would make, the positive image. It is anatomically accurate and shows the front and back of the victim. You can see the spine, the spear wound, one hundred twenty six whip wounds (big number but I forget exactly how many), and even that the right shoulder was dislocated.

Apparently when he carried the cross and fell, the heavy wood bounced up and then fell hard on the shoulder. The arm could not work any more, it was paralyzed. That is why someone else had to carry the cross the rest of the way.

The nails went in at the base of the wrist and angled the tip towards the elbow. This goes through the median nerve. On the right he wouldn't feel anything (hopefully) due to the dislocation but on the left it would be terribly painful. 

There are fluids in the shroud that have been tested. Blood type I think was AB positive. They saw high levels of creatine and another thing that according to the priest was indicative of rhabdomyolysis and extreme trauma. Rhabdo is when muscles are crushed and kidney failure is a risk because of the myoglobin from the broken muscles in the bloodstream gumming up the kidney filtering apparatus. We hydrate and acidify the urine. I have taken care of many trauma patients. The only one I recall with rhabdo jumped off a bridge in a suicide attempt. Just to give you an idea of the intensity of the trauma.

It was hard for me as a medically trained person to listen to a priest talk about medical information.  Especially when it came to the water coming out of the chest. He said it was pleural fluid. I know you can get a pneumothorax, a hemothorax, or a pneumohemothorax where the chest fills with blood. Since he had trouble breathing because of the positioning on the cross, if he tried breathing against a closed airway, fluid would rush into the lung tissues, and pink foam would come up and out. If chest trauma had caused the hemothorax, and the blood had clotted, then you would see clear and blood tinged fluid. 

What bothers me is that the tip of the spear went over the fifth rib on the right and touched the heart tip (possible) according to the priest. Then the 'water' came out.

What I think is that this soldier had seen a lot of crucifixions. And that death was imminent with the fluid of whatever kind in the lung. And he knew how to let it out so that the crucifixion could go on for longer. That person had the kind of knowledge of someone in battle or in healthcare who works with trauma has. That is one of the first things a trauma surgeon team does is put in a chest tube. 

I know everything was cruel and deliberate and designed to make the victim suffer. But from the lecture, that is the biggest thing I encountered.

The lecture itself was hypnotic and boring. My Oura ring actually registered sleep for the whole hour, and my neighbor seated next to me, his wife and daughter didn't even come because they thought it would be boring, and even though he always goes to the special Lent lecture, he agreed it was boring too. 

The speaker spoke of technical things, carbon fourteen dating and other tests. Not many photos. And after long discourses of technical matter, would say Bing! Bong! Wrongo! Basic elementary sounds to summarize to the audience what all of his discourse had been. Proving scientific doubters wrong about the most miraculous piece of cloth. 

He was literally preaching to the choir!

I am grateful for the opportunity. I was hoping for something hopeful, something visual, something to prove that which cannot be proven, once and for all. 

Time to go through another day, and start it. Thank you for your interest and for your reading.

Ross is quiet. He smiles briefly, nods and looks down, and holds up his left arm and hand to say, 'I'll talk to you later'.

clap! clap!

Aloha and Mahalos,

Namaste,

Peace,

Ross and Carla

The Couple

Messages From The End of the Road: Lock and Load

 

I am a fan of summer. Do you know what these are? These are water balloons. Someone is ready for a huge fight! And unlike what has been going on with the spiritual warfare, and unrestricted warfare, and information warfare--which has been going on forever, millennia in fact!--water balloon fights are relatively quick. You run out of the ammunition quickly.

Are you ready?

One of our loved channelers, John Smallman, passed away in October. His daughter Kristie let us know today. That's it. He is gone. No more Saul or Jesus through John messages. It was his time. 

No one knows what tomorrow is going to bring. Even those experts who study the Bible that I follow, well, the algorithm is hiding their posts. And bringing the Bible prophecy in alignment with current events is what they are talking about. 

All I know is that there are some horrible plans out there, and they are not good. This is nothing new, it is in the book of Revelation--things are going to get worse before they improve. There is some agenda thing that is scheduled for 2030. If you have studied those types of sources you could see movements in that general direction. I was talking with a friend in Europe who says that the government wants to 'permanently borrow' the savings of the citizens. That is not good. 

Friday I was stuck doing things on the computer. And one of the things I needed to do was scheduler a technician to come to the house to fix something. A long time ago this company was headquartered a couple miles from my house, and customer service was excellent!

Now I find it is hard to find ways to access a human through 'contact us'. On a different website the electronic form would not submit even though I had clicked all the boxes necessary. Personally, with my old billing company, no one picks up the phone. People respond to email, not voicemail. All this working from home has changed things radically. So here I am, on the phone, with a human, the only person I have spoken to all day, and this man Jerome, let's call him, had the best story!

His daughter is in college, so he works at Taco Bell at night to make it so she does not have to take out loans. And there is something new at his Taco Bell--AI is receiving the orders on the drive through.  He said that some people are okay with it. And others? They just get angry and curse and swear at the speaker!! He said you can't tell who is going to lose their cool by looking at them, but significant numbers just hate the new way to order.

It doesn't surprise me. Other fast foods have their apps and encourage you to order 'ahead'--to get rid of the workers just like the self-check at the grocery store gets rid of the workers too. Some places are cashless. I went to a street fair, and the bar was a pickup truck, especially modified, and that's it there was no cash. I got my first green beer ever and was okay. I also bought some things I didn't really need to help support those who were selling things and renting booths at the event. It helps to support the local economy and the community. 

Another thing that got me upset on Friday is how you need your telephone to get the text so you can log into your bank accounts. It is supposed to be for security. But I always look deeper. How easy it would be to require some implanted device to prove our identity to be able to get into our bank account, or to buy, or to sell! 

I am not the only one thinking along these lines. My church is packed! And last week, on vacation, I went to mass in the morning, at six-thirty a.m. There was about one hundred people there. 

People KNOW.

They sense it in their bones that something funny is going on, and that something isn't right.  I encourage you to really get in touch with your intuition (and discernment). Tell fear to take a hike! But act on your best judgement.  

If church makes you feel better, then go. 

If going on hikes makes you feel better, then hike. 

Be sure to love those around you and let your family know how much you care about them.  Give thanks for everything that goes right in your day, don't worry you won't bore your Creator. Be glad and rejoice for every good thing. And for every not so great thing, look for the silver lining and lean on Spirit to help you make it through.

That is enough for today.

Oh, one more thing!

Here is a story of the daughter of Nathaniel Hawthorne, the author, Rose Hawthorne. She married an abusive man and left him. She became famous for helping those less fortunate, and became a nun. Here is a link story of her life. I really like her story because it wasn't her fault her life wasn't so good in marriage. She really changed and made her life worthwhile. She is on her way to becoming a saint now too.

Ross

I am achy, sore and tired, and I love you. There has been a lot which has been taking my attention as of late. There isn't much to say except you are being guided by the best I have to offer, my loving wife, and her heart is well connected to mine for always. We are close, and therefore since you know us, you are close too.

Remember my love. And to watch the birds and let them bring you joy in these difficult times.

clap! clap! 

Aloha and Mahalos,

Namste,

Peace

Ross and Carla

The Couple who are One

Messages From The End of the Road--Reflections on a Journey Called Life

 

It is a cloudy day. I have the heater on right next to me while I write. Oh! What a journey it has been!

The point is, that we are not encouraged to develop our souls, our spirit, and our knowledge of things metaphysical.  To support this, may I point out the many distractions in forms of entertainment or even struggling to be able to survive and pay the rent...being incarnate has a lot of reasons to overlook the pursuit of the ephemeral and the unseen.

But that is how our life works! Everything, after all, is composed of frequency and vibration, energy. We attract things and experiences to ourselves. 

So, on the one hand, we have a group of beings who are keeping this information and knowledge to themselves, and doing their best to take advantage of those who lack understanding of how everything works. What I have experienced is sort of a long, deep path like the Colorado river here at the horseshoe bend, almost a one hundred eighty degree bend...

I started out deeply fascinated by the metaphysical. I was seven years old and reading Linda Goodman's Sun Signs, my mom's books on numerology, handwriting analysis, palmistry...I couldn't get enough. I felt vaguely familiar with the materials. It was like meeting up with an old friend I had not seen in a long time.

At the same time, I was so drawn to religion! The first time I saw a rosary, I was like five or six, and I stole it from a family friend's dresser when we were visiting! Of all things to steal, right? But I HAD TO HAVE IT and I couldn't explain why. It was not for the beads or the sparkles. I couldn't understand it. We were lapsed from the Church. I made first communion at thirteen and confirmation at fourteen. I went weekly to services ever since. I remember at my grandfather's funeral, actually the rosary service, and I was at the podium guiding the family in their grief, saying the prayers (I did not know how to pray a rosary at that time). I felt energy flowing through me, so strong and powerful! People came up to me and commented afterwards how much my reading meant to them and helped them. 

Once I was in a serious relationship, his mom, who went to Mass daily, gave me a Rosary and I learned how to pray it. Through their family, I met Barbara Matthias, a visionary and locutionary in Santa Maria, California. And that was how I began a personal relationship with Blessed Mother. 

Medical School was daunting! I went to Mass every chance I could! But also, not once but twice, I had the experience of communicating with the recently deceased (not patients). It was just a place I could go. Instinctively, I could talk these souls into taking my hand and I gently walked them over to the Light. I also could go to an old, old house and talk with the owners in Spirit--my favorite conversation was asking the man of the house, in his wood workshop, what was Jesus' favorite toy? It was a wooden carved duck with wheels and a string you could pull. He showed it to me.

I got to a point where I was at the end of my rope. I did not understand why I had these otherworldly experiences, or why I was having them. Then life took me to an education, from psychic development, to Reiki and higher levels, to Divine Peace Healing, Astrology, Mediumship, Healing, and Sicilian/Italian herbal medicine.  I was hungry to learn!

And I was happy. I considered myself a Tribal Catholic.

Then, I read something in 2012. It was Cobra's Red Pill article and I read all of the links. It took a long time, days, but I understood that things are not what they may seem. And I stopped going to church because I did not want to support a facade of good over a deep, dark underbelly of secrets and lies.

It has been like things have been getting harder to hear in Spirit since 2012. I know I used to drink distilled water, and had stopped, perhaps it was my pineal gland getting re-calcified? Was it the trauma of Covid and how it affected our lives? Especially being in the hospital and being made to take care of these patients. I had to take twelve hour shifts just being available to intubate if there was a Code Nineteen overhead page. 

I had lost my bright energy. Yes, my thyroid was half removed. Yes, I had lots of stress being a single mom. I did a lot of learning about myself, my attachment style, my undiagnosed highly functioning ADHD/autism...I learned to open up and share on a personal level, not just here as it had been my only outlet for the longest time, for my heart to just open.

I listened and learned a lot from YouTube like Jessie Czebotar, near death experiences, orthodox Catholics. I struggled with my weight, tore my ACL in Pilates, recovered...I got the job of my dreams (no call! no weekends!) but then increased responsibility (forming a new corporation) and politics really started to get me down.

The only positive is I have learned the Hawaiian language and culture, that has brought me joy! I have adjusted to my son going away to college. 

One thing that stuck with me is Kerth Barker knowing that Christianity is legit. Then Jessie and others have escaped the System through the mercy of our Divine Creator and our Lord Jesus. 

Then I participated in something called a Deliverance session led by an exorcist who is pretty well known online. I felt an incredible lightness in my chest and like all this weight had been lifted off of me!! This was in December 2024.

Then, right after that, the letter from the Homeowner's insurance of cancellation. Then, I had the power washing (expensive), car trouble (expensive) and damage from the power washing to repair (more expenses). This led to the termite tenting (really expensive!). This time I was also having a rat scratching away inside the ceiling over my bathroom and bedroom. Three visits from experts to isolate and stop it were unsuccessful (and expensive!). I also discovered my son was involved in an expensive addiction that he was hiding from me. The next month, more car trouble (expensive!). Oh yes, and a golf ball broke a window, which needed to be fixed (expensive, frustrating). But that has led to more things to need fixing...

Can you tell that someone somewhere did not like my participation in the Deliverance sessions? That someone was majorly pissed, was it not?

Now I have come back to the Church. And my heart is very happy, my energy is good, and I feel complete. What the Church does is say a St. Michael's prayer after every mass, and for this I am thankful! Divine Mother has helped considerably with my son's concerns, there has been improvement.

Both hands need to work together. A good tool for Divine Creator needs to understand both the easy/happy parts of the unseen, as well as have a working knowledge of what deception and activities are hidden in plain sight. It is almost as if I entered one curriculum that has been followed by another. 

I remember a long time ago, I was sick of having my heart broken by men, and I considered joining the convent. For the first time in my life, God said NO. I ended up becoming a mother. I learned about Sister Charlotte. God was protecting me! There was another time God said NO, and I trust again it was for my own benefit and to keep me from harm. 

Am I staying with Reiki?

Yes.

Nobody can appreciate the experiences in Spirit I personally have had. Does the deliverance guy hate Reiki and does it hurt when he says so? Yes. It does. But I also take into consideration where he is coming from, and his Purpose. He could not do what he does if he was having experiences that were any different from the ones he has had, right?

Am I pulling a Doreen Virtue? No. Not on your life.

Am I doing a Lisa Raven Eddy? In my own way, I would say yes. Both of us are processing our experiences with respect to our upbringing. And, like her, I would say there is a group of souls who are not the 'witchy witchy woo woo' healers Jessie Czebotar has described, but are more like the James and Deb who Kerth Barker describes. Super strong Christians who know things through the Holy Spirit and have a working knowledge of both this world and the hereafter. And this type of connection is very sweet. It connects hearts and brings out the best in ourselves and those around us.

We long for the afterlife because deep down everyone knows that is what is truly REAL. And like Hope Johnson says, what we are doing here is 'making everything up!'--here in the third dimension. The greatest purpose is for LOVE. 

The Colorado river started off as snowfall on the Rockies! Then it ended up flowing through canyons, carving them, taking seemingly random turns through a literal desert! Sometimes the water is green, blue, or even red/muddy! But it always keeps flowing, and keeps heading towards its final destination, the sea.

Be like the Colorado River. Always keep moving and learning. Pick yourself up after your mistakes and know that mistakes are totally human. Remember you are both loved and cherished. Of incredible value to all of us here and on the other side of the Veil. Keep being YOU, experience JOY, and make the most of the time you have here with us on Earth, incarnate.

Ross said he couldn't get a word in edgewise and is waiting until next time to speak and share his perspective.He is poking a little fun at me and that is okay. I am used to it!

clap! clap!

Aloha and Mahalos,

Namaste,

Peace,

Ross and Carla

The Couple