When I came out last week in the Operating Room, the number one question was: was it scary and what is it like?
For those of you that are not able to talk to the deceased, I will give an example of a comforting that came to me in the OB Anesthesia Call room last night.
I was in meditation.
A voice asked, 'what is it that thou wants?'
I want Tom and to be sixteen again, with my heart full of love for him, and with the emotional/mental maturity that I have now.
I want someone to be there for me, and I for him.
I want to wash his underwear and know he would be washing mine.
I want to feel his skin next to mine. I want to be embraced in full acceptance, like Joseph (a fellow psychic development circle student) with his toning OM last night in a hug.
I think the bigger picture is: I want to be a spiritual being healing in medicine as an anesthesiologist.
But to have a friend, much like I have in my children, someone whose love for me is pure.
I am tired. I am tired of being alone. I am tired of meeting and falling for the wrong person. I am tired of everything. (my energy is sinking very low at this point. I am crying out for help from the Angels with my heart).
I miss Tom.
No one was ever like him.
Teddy (Tom's mother) is here. She just pops in. Here is what she ways, in bold:
You loved my family.
You bonded with them.
Try to get it back.
Look at you. Tom. His middle sister. My oldest son. My oldest daughter. (at their families now)
How did you do?
me: I did better.
What got you from here to there?
me: lack of sex
It has been a long hard night for you, hasn't it?...It is DAY! (c: I see Heaven open up and she gestures like Vanna White)
me: Teddy, you know how much I loved you?
I did. And that you looked up to me. I also loved you with my heart. I wanted you to be my daughter-in-law but Howard wanted no part of it. Your future was that bright, and he sought to protect it for you.
What do you do when you are alone? Do you hate it?
me: Away from my children? Yes. In a social setting I am brave. Being a couple is out of reach.
There is no match for you, is there? Well, there is ONE (holds up one finger). You are close
(shows a tiny space between thumb and forefinger, like to pinch)
me: any hints?
Love and family. Where do you go for that?
me: Church? (no) Disneyland? (no) My house? (yes) Is it Q (neighbor)? (no)
(she points down the hill in the neighborhood) Love will carry you. Your love will carry you down in a basket. You will not be dead.
Let go of all your worries. God is beaming love into your heart. That heart is beautiful. I can see it here bright as day. Tom loves you. Just like you love him.
And with that, Teddy was gone. And I was in tears, with relief, joy, and gratitude for everything she said. It came with a love that does not come through in my transcription.
One day soon, you will not have need of mediums, psychics, and psychic development. It is all something you know how to do, and have the ability. When the energy ramps up even more, and Ascension takes place, you will be able to do all of these psychic gifts and more. Please regard this as a sampling of what is yet to come in your life, for always and forever. Heaven is healing.
Namaste,
Reiki Doc